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  #1  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 01:31 PM
Anonymous29412
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I really, really would give almost anything to hear T's voice right now.

I know it probably comes from a very young part of me...things are in upheaval, and he is my safe base.

I am so so sad today. I don't have anyone to talk to. My H is in a major work crisis, my "best friend" won't talk to me anymore...I've reached out on FB and text to other friends and no one is there. My mom is drunk and has been all day...sometimes her half-love helps, but it's almost never available.

My T is on vacation. I feel SO alone and adrift. All of the changes in my life are coming to a head and I seem to be running out of steam with the good coping. I keep telling myself that as long as I keep eating and sleeping and exercising I'm okay, but I have been crying all day (and eating, sleeping, and exercising). And I know big feelings really are okay, but I'm just so LONELY, and I just really really really need T. I just DO.

Ugh. It hurts.
Thanks for this!
WePow

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  #2  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 01:36 PM
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BlessedRhiannon BlessedRhiannon is offline
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Member Since: Feb 2011
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(((((Tree))))) I'm so sorry you're struggling right now.

As my T constantly tells me...just keep breathing and take things one small step at a time. You CAN handle this.

Can you leave your T a voicemail or send him an email, even knowing that he won't get it or respond to it right away? Would that help to just reach out and throw your worries at someone else for a while?
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---Rhi
Thanks for this!
BonnieJean
  #3  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 01:53 PM
Anonymous37890
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I'm here, not much help, but I am thinking of you and sending good thoughts your way. Hang in there! HUGS.
  #4  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 05:38 PM
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kaliope kaliope is offline
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Treehouse
Sometimes I will call T just to listen to the voicemail and then I hang up. Just hearing his voice helps. I also have one of his messages saved on my phone so I can hear his voice to ground me. I have some texts from my old T saved on my phone, words of encouragement that I have saved for a few years now, transferring from phone to phone so I can look at them when i need them. I know it is hard when you are reaching out and nobody is available. I do not have much of a support system myself. People say they will be there, but texts/phone calls go unanswered which only serve to increase the lonliness and feelings of not being cared for. I am glad I found PC because I can post and replies seem to pop up right away from people who genuinely know where I am at, who understand what I am going through. True, they are not my "friends" but they are giving me more support than my friends ever do. You know we are here for you when nobody else is.
Thanks for this!
BonnieJean
  #5  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 05:43 PM
Butterflies Are Free Butterflies Are Free is offline
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We are all here for you, Tree! I am really sorry things are so rough right now.
I like everyone's suggestion of calling your T's answering machine just to hear his voice.
  #6  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 05:50 PM
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elliemay elliemay is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2007
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Yeah, I know. I had to have a medical procedure today and it was kinda scary. I took the book "the gift of therapy" by our favorite Yalom with me.

I miss my therapist too, but that book helps me. to reconnect to how I feel when I'm with my therapist.

I understand.
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.........................
  #7  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 05:56 PM
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WePow WePow is offline
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((((((((((((Tree)))))))))))))
Can you go ahead and write T an email and just send to him? Even if he is on vacation, you can start it with "I know you are away and I don't expect a response... but I need you and just need to share my heart with you..."
Just doing that may help you to make it through.
  #8  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 06:09 PM
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laceylu laceylu is offline
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I get it and I am sending you my positive wishes for you to feel better.
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Hiding Hurts, Sharing Helps
  #9  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 06:12 PM
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mixedup_emotions mixedup_emotions is offline
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(((( Tree ))))

I'm sorry you're in such a tough place - and feel the need so strongly for T while he is unavailable. Such difficult emotions....You've gotten some great feedback here. I find that reading T's emails, etc. helps me - although sometimes it makes the urge to see him stronger...ugh. Purging your feelings by email is also another way that might give you some relief.

((( BIG HUGS )))
__________________
Don't follow the path that lies before you. Instead, veer from the path - and leave a trail...
Thanks for this!
BonnieJean
  #10  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 06:14 PM
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childofyen childofyen is offline
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(((((((Tree)))))))
  #11  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 06:16 PM
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nannypat nannypat is offline
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I also have called my T's answering machine just to listen to his voice and help ground my self. I do leave a message saying what I am doing and we have talked about it and he has said it is certainly fine to do if it is helpful.
I am sorry things are so difficult right now. My thoughts are with you.
  #12  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 08:02 PM
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rainbow_rose rainbow_rose is offline
looking for rainbows
 
Member Since: May 2011
Posts: 2,653
((((((((((treehouse)))))))))
__________________
Happiness cannot be found
through great effort and willpower,
but is already present,
in open relaxation and letting go.

Don't strain yourself,
there is nothing to do or undo.
Whatever momentarily arises
in the body-mind
Has no real importance at all,
has little reality whatsoever.

Don't believe in the reality
of good and bad experiences;
they are today's ephemeral weather,
like rainbows in the sky.


~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~

  #13  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 08:21 PM
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googley googley is offline
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Posts: 7,516
(((((((((Tree))))))))))

Do you have the phone message T left you after your last session? Could you listen to that? If not, maybe you can call your Ts voice mail to hear his voice. I hope that this passes quickly. Good job on using the good coping skills. That is the best thing for yourself. You can do it. Good job reaching out here.

  #14  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 08:29 PM
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unaluna unaluna is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 42,191
Quote:
Originally Posted by kaliope View Post
I also have one of his messages saved on my phone so I can hear his voice to ground me.
me too! a bunch! makes getting your messages a hassle but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.
  #15  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 08:57 PM
Anonymous29412
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What's so silly is that T leaves me a voice mail after every. single. appointment. I literally have like 42 voice mails from him on my phone (because my phone holds 45 and I need to leave some space for new ones). I'm embarrassed to type that, actually. Because there it is, as much T as I need, really.

I. am. just. so. alone. That's the problem.
  #16  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 09:09 PM
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dizgirl2011 dizgirl2011 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 1,193
Quote:
Originally Posted by treehouse View Post
What's so silly is that T leaves me a voice mail after every. single. appointment. I literally have like 42 voice mails from him on my phone (because my phone holds 45 and I need to leave some space for new ones). I'm embarrassed to type that, actually. Because there it is, as much T as I need, really.

I. am. just. so. alone. That's the problem.
Hey huni,

I am so sorry you are feeling so low ***huge hugs***

is there any type of drop in centres were you can go to just talk to someone? In the UK we have the samaritans for people in destress, they run a helpline and have drop in centres? It may just help to be with someone who will listen?

we are here for you
  #17  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 09:43 PM
Anonymous29412
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I'm okay. I really am.

It's just one of those things I have to get through. And I will.

Coming here and finding SO many replies really helped, actually. I know I'm not *really* alone.
Thanks for this!
rainbow_rose, sittingatwatersedge
  #18  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 11:26 PM
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googley googley is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2009
Posts: 7,516
((((((((((((((((Tree)))))))))))))

More hugs for you.

  #19  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 11:31 PM
rainbow_rose's Avatar
rainbow_rose rainbow_rose is offline
looking for rainbows
 
Member Since: May 2011
Posts: 2,653
oops. wrong thread
__________________
Happiness cannot be found
through great effort and willpower,
but is already present,
in open relaxation and letting go.

Don't strain yourself,
there is nothing to do or undo.
Whatever momentarily arises
in the body-mind
Has no real importance at all,
has little reality whatsoever.

Don't believe in the reality
of good and bad experiences;
they are today's ephemeral weather,
like rainbows in the sky.


~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~

  #20  
Old Aug 05, 2011, 11:32 PM
crazycanbegood's Avatar
crazycanbegood crazycanbegood is offline
Grand Member
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Down the road from the looney bin
Posts: 788
be strong!
  #21  
Old Aug 06, 2011, 02:03 AM
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BonnieJean BonnieJean is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2011
Location: in the windmills of my mind
Posts: 1,334
Quote:
Originally Posted by treehouse View Post
I'm okay. I really am.

It's just one of those things I have to get through. And I will.

Coming here and finding SO many replies really helped, actually. I know I'm not *really* alone.
Tree- I know you don't have to be *really* alone to feel alone. I can feel alone in a room full of people. For me, some of it has to do with whether I think there is someone who 'gets it,' who understands (like my T does). Even if I don't know your circumstances to 'get it' for you, I do relate to the alone feeling. I'm glad you are finding some support here.
__________________
-BJ

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