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  #26  
Old Jan 22, 2012, 11:45 PM
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CantExplain CantExplain is offline
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Originally Posted by stopdog View Post
I do not want to be mocked for crying and the t could do it. And loss of control like that could lead to chaos and I would only have myself to blame.
A T that mocks crying is no T. We've seen some awful Ts on this forum, but never one as bad as that.

Is there a box of tissues in the room where the patient can reach it? That's for those who cry.
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  #27  
Old Jan 23, 2012, 12:03 AM
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velcro003 velcro003 is offline
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yeah i know there are bad T's out there...but ones who mock you for crying?! unless they are a sociopath and joined that profession purely to feel power over crying clients (which must be like 95% of their clientele)...that should NEVER happen. Why would you think your T would mock you, and how would that look like to you?
Thanks for this!
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  #28  
Old Jan 23, 2012, 02:24 AM
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SoupDragon SoupDragon is offline
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Originally Posted by velcro003 View Post
yeah i know there are bad T's out there...but ones who mock you for crying?! unless they are a sociopath and joined that profession purely to feel power over crying clients (which must be like 95% of their clientele)...that should NEVER happen. Why would you think your T would mock you, and how would that look like to you?
For me it is that split between rational and irrational - I have learned to trust my T competely in my head - I can almost hear his soothing voice, how it would sound if I was crying and maybe for the first time he would reach out and even hold my hand or touch my shoulder - how caring, how acknowledging / validating - BUT how totally terrifying - I too can see him mocking, ignoring me, sighing, telling me to pull myself together - guess this is transference?
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  #29  
Old Jan 23, 2012, 03:05 AM
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CantExplain CantExplain is offline
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Originally Posted by SoupDragon View Post
For me it is that split between rational and irrational - I have learned to trust my T competely in my head - I can almost hear his soothing voice, how it would sound if I was crying and maybe for the first time he would reach out and even hold my hand or touch my shoulder - how caring, how acknowledging / validating - BUT how totally terrifying - I too can see him mocking, ignoring me, sighing, telling me to pull myself together - guess this is transference?
Could well be transference. In my paranoid moods I often feel mocked.

Has your T ever mocked you?

Anyway, the usual advice applies: take it back to T!
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  #30  
Old Jan 23, 2012, 03:37 AM
KazzaX KazzaX is offline
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Originally Posted by SoupDragon View Post
Thanks Kazzax - do you know how it happened for you to feel negative feelings again at least? I am willing to sit and feel these things with T, I just don't know how to do it - sometimes I would like my T to be horrible to me as I am sure that would bring about some emotional response.
I'm not quite sure. She insisted we keep going over my negative past and pushed and pushed me, and then I got angry at her for doing so. Bamm! I could feel anger! And then when I realised she couldn't help me, my depression got worse and therefore I could feel sadness again! And that's where we stopped.. lol. Sadness and frustration and anger. And that's still where I'm at, 3 years later haha. But in theory, 3 emotions is better than none. Apparently a decent T would have kept going and eventually after the negative emotions comes the positive ones.
  #31  
Old Jan 23, 2012, 03:45 AM
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CantExplain CantExplain is offline
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Originally Posted by KazzaX View Post
I'm not quite sure. She insisted we keep going over my negative past and pushed and pushed me, and then I got angry at her for doing so. Bamm! I could feel anger! And then when I realised she couldn't help me, my depression got worse and therefore I could feel sadness again! And that's where we stopped.. lol. Sadness and frustration and anger. And that's still where I'm at, 3 years later haha. But in theory, 3 emotions is better than none. Apparently a decent T would have kept going and eventually after the negative emotions comes the positive ones.
Can you feel fear?
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  #32  
Old Jan 23, 2012, 05:17 AM
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SoupDragon SoupDragon is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CantExplain View Post
Could well be transference. In my paranoid moods I often feel mocked.

Has your T ever mocked you?

Anyway, the usual advice applies: take it back to T!
Actually yes once I perceived that he did. We did talk about it a couple of months later when I plucked up the courage to tell him and he said he was so very sorry and I should always tell him if I felt that he did that. It was a fairly small thing that he did, but I guess I am highly sensitive, got teased continuously as a child and mocked - my father would purposefully try to anger me and then would laugh if I reacted - so it was safer to hide all emotions - hmm had forgotton that - kind of a light bulb moment isn't it? I just wishes I knew how to flick that switch again though and be able to cry with T.

I have also just reflected and note that for the last few months I have been a bit closed off from things, bored with T and just wanting to get it over and done with - the last few days my interest has been ignited again - wonder why that is - I kept saying to T I needed a break, maybe I have been giving myself one and now feel rested enough to get stuck in aqain - well at least to sit on the wall and have a good look around.
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  #33  
Old Jan 23, 2012, 07:31 AM
sittingatwatersedge sittingatwatersedge is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KazzaX View Post
And that's where we stopped.. lol. Sadness and frustration and anger. And that's still where I'm at, 3 years later haha. ....
I read this and I don't really hear lol and hahaha. I hear someone who needs this keep fighting, you are doing hard work, good work.
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