What is is the wildest thing you ever asked?????

Kacey2 · Feb 25, 2012 at 08:47 PM

Ok, so this is a slight spin off from another posting. I have a really good therapist and I myself may just be the most unpolished client in the world.

Many months after the, "How many times a week do you and wife have sex?" question I tried again.

This time I asked............ "Does wife give you bl--j--s?"

T's reply:
"I am having a huge reaction to this question and I am on the ceiling right now. I am going to get myself grounded. Then he said, "KC, I know that you have really important questions regarding sex, given your history it really couldn't be any other way, and we are going to sort all of this out."

I blurted out it was a bad and stupid question.

T kindly spoke again. "KC you don't have bad and stupid questions. Let's try and find a more effective way to ask your questions."

How many of you also feel like you blurt out the wrong things to t's? If so are you willing to share that conversation here? How did your t's handle it? What do your t's do with those "personal" questions?

crazycanbegood · Feb 25, 2012 at 09:13 PM

Once it occurred to me that my T might have cancer, so I asked her if she had it or had had it before. She said, "where is this question coming from??" I told her I just had a gut feeling that she did. She later mentioned how that question, coming out of nowhere, really rattled her. She did have cancer a year before I asked the question.

stopdog · Feb 25, 2012 at 09:35 PM

I have asked the one I see if she is reasonably competent and if she would tell me if she was not.

Kacey2 · Feb 25, 2012 at 09:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazycanbegood

Once it occurred to me that my T might have cancer, so I asked her if she had it or had had it before. She said, "where is this question coming from??" I told her I just had a gut feeling that she did. She later mentioned how that question, coming out of nowhere, really rattled her. She did have cancer a year before I asked the question.

Wow Crazy, that is Crazy! Your intuition is a gift, truly.

delicatefade26 · Feb 25, 2012 at 09:59 PM

[QUOTE=Kacey2;
This time I asked............ "Does wife give you bl--j--s?"
[/QUOTE]

That is for sure wild...did you ever get the question answered? haha

Kacey2 · Feb 25, 2012 at 10:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by delicatefade26

That is for sure wild...did you ever get the question answered? haha

Naw, but instead of just one uncomfortable person in the room there was suddenly two.

Feb 25, 2012 at 10:23 PM

I guess I'm not as brave and open as you are, Kacey2. Sure glad your therapist doesn't get twitchy when you asked those kind of blunt questions.

Stick with him, he's a keeper!

FourRedheads · Feb 25, 2012 at 10:37 PM

Wow, I am not open like that! Part of me is jealous that you can speak so freely. I'm quite sure my T would fall off her chair if I asked her something other than the usual "Are you mad at me? Have I said too much?"

crazycanbegood · Feb 25, 2012 at 10:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kacey2

Wow Crazy, that is Crazy! Your intuition is a gift, truly.

haha thanks. I have guessed a lot about my T, like asking when her birthday is on the day of her birthday. i think my paranoid, protective hypervigilance is overactive in therapy.

btw, you are very bold to ask that question of your T! I am surprised he handled it sooooo well. He's a good T, you got there.

crazycanbegood · Feb 25, 2012 at 10:54 PM

OH! Once I was annoyed with my T for asking about my meds, so I asked her if she was taking any...

lostmyway21 · Feb 25, 2012 at 10:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kacey2

Ok, so this is a slight spin off from another posting. I have a really good therapist and I myself may just be the most unpolished client in the world.

Many months after the, "How many times a week do you and wife have sex?" question I tried again.

This time I asked............ "Does wife give you bl--j--s?"

T's reply:
"I am having a huge reaction to this question and I am on the ceiling right now. I am going to get myself grounded. Then he said, "KC, I know that you have really important questions regarding sex, given your history it really couldn't be any other way, and we are going to sort all of this out."

I blurted out it was a bad and stupid question.

T kindly spoke again. "KC you don't have bad and stupid questions. Let's try and find a more effective way to ask your questions."

How many of you also feel like you blurt out the wrong things to t's? If so are you willing to share that conversation here? How did your t's handle it? What do your t's do with those "personal" questions?

I'm having a crappy night but reading this post and then imagining asking my T just made me laugh. Thank you!

Id imagine he would give me this look

NO way he could keep a poker face. Part of me wants to ask for his reaction now.

crazycanbegood · Feb 25, 2012 at 11:01 PM

Kacey, what would you had said or done if he answered the question?

with or without you · Feb 25, 2012 at 11:33 PM

Oh no, I could never ask my T any sort of "wild" question. She's too nice of a person!

Feb 25, 2012 at 11:54 PM

Hm...we have asked our T lots of questions about herself... maybe one of the craziest was asking her if SHE was crazy. She said, "Yep I am, a little!"

Feb 25, 2012 at 11:58 PM

My inner kids have no filter and a lot of curious questions about sex stuff. Theyve asked stuff that makes my heart stop.

Questions I have been asked by clients: How often do you have sex with your hubby? Do you masturbate? Have you "experimented" when you were younger? Is there any sexual topic that make you uncomfortable? Then just general sexual questions about how to be comfortable with oral sex, etc etc.

rainbow8 · Feb 26, 2012 at 10:21 AM

stormy, do you answer those questions? Do you also get asked more general questions like I want to ask my T, and do you answer them? Thanks.

Butterflies Are Free · Feb 26, 2012 at 11:18 AM

I did ask my T if she goes to her own T.

Kacey2 · Feb 26, 2012 at 11:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazycanbegood

Kacey, what would you had said or done if he answered the question?

Well, first off, I might have thrown up in my mouth a little.

Then it would have just 'unleashed the beast' so to speak. I probably would have asked him more questions each as personal as the last and he would be like, "oh my..........................what has happened to this conversation?"

We have encountered this before. His wife and him co teach skills training for DBT and one of the rules of DBT is no sexual contact between group members. I'm all about following rules and I just kind of expected them to follow as well. I just couldn't understand how they could abstain for so long. That's when t informed me (gently again) that the rules didn't apply to the group leaders. ?? what do I know??

Kacey2 · Feb 26, 2012 at 11:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Butterflies Are Free

I did ask my T if she goes to her own T.

Well does she?

Kacey2 · Feb 26, 2012 at 12:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stormyangels

My inner kids have no filter and a lot of curious questions about sex stuff. Theyve asked stuff that makes my heart stop.

Questions I have been asked by clients: How often do you have sex with your hubby? Do you masturbate? Have you "experimented" when you were younger? Is there any sexual topic that make you uncomfortable? Then just general sexual questions about how to be comfortable with oral sex, etc etc.

Yah Stormy I want to know too. Do you answer those sex questions? And can you give us an example of how the conversation would go? Thanks!!

And on the flip side when you ask your t, what does she do? Inquiring minds want to know.

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crazycanbegood Grand Member Member Since Mar 2011 Location: Down the road from the looney bin Posts: 788 13	Feb 25, 2012 at 09:13 PM #2 Once it occurred to me that my T might have cancer, so I asked her if she had it or had had it before. She said, "where is this question coming from??" I told her I just had a gut feeling that she did. She later mentioned how that question, coming out of nowhere, really rattled her. She did have cancer a year before I asked the question.
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stopdog underdog is here Member Since Sep 2011 Location: blank Posts: 34,805 (SuperPoster!) 12 1 hugs given	Feb 25, 2012 at 09:35 PM #3 I have asked the one I see if she is reasonably competent and if she would tell me if she was not.
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delicatefade26 Grand Member Member Since Jul 2011 Location: My Wonderland Posts: 811 12 334 hugs given	Feb 25, 2012 at 09:59 PM #5 [QUOTE=Kacey2; This time I asked............ "Does wife give you bl--j--s?" [/QUOTE] That is for sure wild...did you ever get the question answered? haha __________________ "Wake me up...when September ends"
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Anonymous37777 Guest Posts: n/a	Feb 25, 2012 at 10:23 PM #7 I guess I'm not as brave and open as you are, Kacey2. Sure glad your therapist doesn't get twitchy when you asked those kind of blunt questions. Stick with him, he's a keeper!
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FourRedheads Veteran Member Member Since Aug 2011 Location: ... Posts: 715 12 1,782 hugs given	Feb 25, 2012 at 10:37 PM #8 Wow, I am not open like that! Part of me is jealous that you can speak so freely. I'm quite sure my T would fall off her chair if I asked her something other than the usual "Are you mad at me? Have I said too much?"
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crazycanbegood Grand Member Member Since Mar 2011 Location: Down the road from the looney bin Posts: 788 13	Feb 25, 2012 at 10:54 PM #10 OH! Once I was annoyed with my T for asking about my meds, so I asked her if she was taking any...
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crazycanbegood Grand Member Member Since Mar 2011 Location: Down the road from the looney bin Posts: 788 13	Feb 25, 2012 at 11:01 PM #12 Kacey, what would you had said or done if he answered the question?
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with or without you Poohbah Member Since Nov 2010 Location: US Posts: 1,273 13	Feb 25, 2012 at 11:33 PM #13 Oh no, I could never ask my T any sort of "wild" question. She's too nice of a person!
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Anonymous47147 Guest Posts: n/a	Feb 25, 2012 at 11:54 PM #14 Hm...we have asked our T lots of questions about herself... maybe one of the craziest was asking her if SHE was crazy. She said, "Yep I am, a little!"
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rainbow8 Legendary Member Since Mar 2009 Location: US Posts: 13,284 (SuperPoster!) 15 9,983 hugs given	Feb 26, 2012 at 10:21 AM #16 stormy, do you answer those questions? Do you also get asked more general questions like I want to ask my T, and do you answer them? Thanks.
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Butterflies Are Free Grand Member Member Since Jun 2011 Location: USA Posts: 892 12 26 hugs given	Feb 26, 2012 at 11:18 AM #17 I did ask my T if she goes to her own T.
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