Couch 26

Pics Granite...... Ill be the judge of that...LOL

(((((Chopin)))) Show those fools who's boss.

Hello everyone. Lola, how was T? Granite..pics...please..lol....

Murry, Sconnie...glad you had good sessions. Its my off week to Artemis.

Anyway...went Christmas shopping. I had 9 kids on my list to buy for. Not sure how I accumulated 9 kids. I guess some adults are going to lose out this year. This crap is way too expensive. $20.00 for a barbie doll? That does not even come with extra clothes? WTH.... well...20 minute rest before I go visit my little boy.

T was T, Its becoming less eventful each time.... He is not as enthusiastic as he used to be and Im not feeling it.... we talked about my sister. I will call her tonight to "define or relationship"... when did life get so Flippin complicated?

9 kids, holy moly!

i will post pic when i figure it all out and clean up

This is a whole 'nother breed of sharks. Two especially. One is leaving. The other I'm going to share an office with. Boss says everything's going to be okay. I'm not so sure. I don't play politics well. I'm looking for hyperbole and finding it everywhere. My head and neck hurts so badly. It hasn't hurt this badly in a long time.

Chopin..... don't let her get to you.... Women in an office can be a giant group of *****es, watch your back and keep your enemies close.

been home since 12.. cleaning has yet to happen. opps.

therapy is too hard. And it's not going to actually accomplish what I want to accomplish. I'm really pissy this afternoon and thinking about trying to schedule a consult with former T.

whats going on MKAC ????

Yeah . wanna talk about it MKAC?

I had it out with my coworker; we're fine now. This is an effin' henhouse.

Way to go Chop.... puff that chest out and start peeing on things...

I don't know Chopin. I might refrain from peeing on things....just sayin

How else she gonna mark her territory? LOL

bleah. DOUBLE BLEAH. Basically, I finally admitted that I WANT to be the most important person in someone's life (basically ANYONE, I don't care, I'm not picky, I apparently just desperately want this). I have resisted admitting that because it seems so needy and gross. AND I am NEVER going to get that. I have never had, or will I ever get it. I have some sort of inherent defect that just makes me not good enough someone for someone to really love me. So I WANT to just come to terms with that, and then STOP wanting it. And my T will not help me.

He says it's about grieving not having gotten it and learning to think of myself as a giant loser.

her boss did say to be territorial didn't he

I wish we could hug more then once MKAC. Your not a giant loser and you are important in the lives of many people (((((((MKAC))))))))

Oh, MKAC, I know that hurts. I was just saying that myself.

Good work, Chopin!

I'm pooped. Lots of running around at the bird clinic today. I've been feeling like I want to isolate, so I'm going to a friend's for dinner. I may fall asleep in the soup

oh MKAC you are so not a looser at all.i know it is so hard when you didn't get that feeling of being the most important person in the world from your parents. and it is so hard to face that it isn't something most of us get as an adult either. i bet for the longest time you were the most important person in your childrens world.i know you like to keep your kids out of your t but i know it is true unfortunately they have to grow up. it's hard

Oh MKAC I am so so sorry that you are feeling that way. Sadly I think I understand how you feel and it sucks.

I do know that I was and sometimes still am the most important person to my children. I guess part of what makes this gross to me, is that it's about me being selfish and needy. I would never use my children to meet my needs. So it's really about having someone who loves me, thinks I'm important and makes my needs a priority.

Its not selfish or needy with a negative connotation to want to be loved unconditionally. Its human nature and those of us who didn't receive it as children see it as foreign and unnatural , when in reality I think its our perceptions that are that way. I'm sorry MKAC

MKAC - i think it is some of the reason why a lot of people have pets.

Wouldn't it be cool to be loved like your dog loves? I know that's close to how I felt about my kids. Mad, passionate, intense, total devotion.

For me, no I would not like it. I have chosen a dog breed (and rescue mix of that breed) that somewhat aloof and cat like. Breeds like golden retreivers, while excellent dogs, would drive me insane. But i know and am glad there are many ways of being for everyone.