Couch 56...Getting Back to our roots

I do have nother appt with this T monday and another lady lined up for next wednesday, but maybe I should just wait til im in some sort of crisis, so then they will see I'm crazy... or maybe it will never happen. Wiki doensn't have a T.... maybe I'm ok now.

Do you think a nightmare about the rape could really be a true memory of the rape?

Take in some of your posts.

Healed... its hard to tell...

I've had some nightmares that seemed so real but then they had something obviously rediculous in it like the dream had a high school teacher in it at my work..

but then I had a dream about giving my mom an electric juicer (in the 70s) that seemed so real and I was sure it was a newly located past memory... I looked through all of my photo albums to make sure there wasn't a picture of it somewhere (cause sometimes I really think I remember something but the only thing I remember is what is seen in a picture)..and no picture... and then I googled it to see if there was really such a thing that looked like it from the 70s and my memory was just like the picture and then I asked my mom and she confirmed we did give her one when I was like 8 years old... so it was retrieved from my memory through a dream...

I would definitely journal about it and write down everything that happened in the dream to talk to T about...

ETA: obviously I'm not comparing the subjects of the dreams just using as an example.

Lola, I totally agree with needing a therapist who is at least as smart as you are. I had one for a few sessions who clearly wasn't and it did not go well. I'm not even sure she understood some of the words I used.

The headache I've had for more than two weeks is letting up. It woke me up about 4 am, but it's better after some more sleep. Perhaps the new meds I got yesterday made a difference. One of them is a muscle relaxant, so I'm a teensy bit loopy.

Loopy is a funny word.

I don't actually think degrees have anything to do with intelligence. I have advanced degrees and there are things I do not understand. I have seen/been friends with (different ones) therapists with ph.ds who were dead flat bonkers if not idiots.
I don't think therapists in general are a particularly smart group of people. I think if one was that smart, one would not want to be a therapist.
That one I see became upset one time when I recognized she was asking me a stupid question. She misunderstood and thought I was calling her stupid when in fact I thought she was asking me stupid questions because she was being wily.

Well, Wiki ain't as bat sh it crazy as you are!


I agree. Like cpa's, they have poor insight into career paths. Hell, I should have been a lawyer, then I could be a bad *** instead of a geek with a pocket protector and long adding machine tape.

Long adding machine tapes are sexy, damn it.

(I had to post another picture since obviously I am NOT working)

Unfortunately, although bad a ss is the lawyer image, we are often non-math geeks unduly beset by depression and anxiety as a profession.
I sometimes wonder if adding machine tape and no fear of math would have made me happier.

I am SO ticked off right now.....I showed up at the neurologist office and the door was locked. I called and the answering service said they believed the office was closed for the day. WTF???? Why didn't they tell me that yesterday when I called and they told me they were in at 9:30 AM? And why didn't they tell me when I called at 9:30 AM that they would be in at 10 AM? AND I HAD AN APPT TODAY!!!!

I am SO upset right now. I stayed in my car at the office until 11 AM, hoping that maybe the dr would show up. Nope.

And it takes months to get an appt. with this doctor. I need relief NOW.

I called my primary doctor to see if she could fit me in today - thinking MAYBE she would give me an injection or a script for steroids or something. Her only appt. time is when I have group. *sigh*

I may go to urgent care.....or hold out until I can call my neurologist tomorrow to see WTF is going on.....

SO distraught. Took another pain pill, a klonopin....and may take a muscle relaxer.

I HATE THIS LIFE.

Yea...and cpa's NEVER suffer from depression and anxiety
(which is why there are a million of us on PC)

But not the bad a ss kind like lawyers.

And me and math were never going to be compatible. Or neat rows of columns. That would make me more bonkers than I already am. I like my piles of papers.

I cannot tell you how many people comment on my super bare desk. I cannot STAND unorderly piles of papers. Besides, piles of papers attract spiders, MKAC proved this yesterday.

(((MUE)))

So...we can thereby conclude that lawyers are a positive force in the procreation of arachnids.

Therefore: Stopdog is actually Peter Parker.

MUE - What the hell? You had an appt and they aren't there?? WHAT?? What's the address? The couch will go picket.

(oh and pbutton, my interns used to tell me that my desk was proof that I seldom worked...lol)

I don't like spiders. I do like my papers which have been spider-free thus far.

Peter Parker was the whiniest super hero ever. I have always just wanted to slap him.

My older dog keeps whacking himself into the window trying to catch a fly.
I think I am going to call him smart as a therapist.

Stopdog is right. Attorneys as a profession have among the highest rates of depression, substance abuse and suicide.

In reference to having a T be smarter, I also think that is important. I tried out several who were clearly fairly dim and I could not have worked with them. My T seems brilliant as long as we're in his area of expertise. When I explain something he knows nothing about to him (something legal or horse related for instance), he understands quickly and remembers what I tell him.

I have had a couple of nightmares that turned out to be real memories.

I don't think the one I see remembers her own name let alone what I tell her. I also have found little evidence she understands what I say. On that we are even as I do not understand what she says either.

(((mu_e))) I'm grabbing a pitchfork and joining the riot at the neuro's office.

I also don't think it's a good idea to have a T who is less smart than you. There are different kinds of smarts, though, and I suppose that also has to mesh.

Also:


(cos I'm a linguist)

The couch could picket, but no one would be there to see it. LOL.

Yeah, I'm really bummed. After hearing that their office was closed, I just started bawling my eyes out. But it is what it is. I will certainly address it with them tomorrow (if they're even open) and see if they can get me in soon.

The thing that sucks too is that I made myself unavailable to work because of this appt....and will now have to make myself unavailable to work when it's rescheduled. *sigh*

Luckily, though, my neurologist has donated his botox to me numerous times over the last couple years because my insurance won't cover it (it costs about $1200 for the med alone). I am appreciative of his kindness and generosity - but that doesn't make me less upset about this situation.