couch 63 the fall line

Yeah Granite... I know it is hard. I'm not doubting myself on this one. Its hard to know what to do but really I don't think there is anything more I can do. I just try to be myself and accept that this maybe the way things are going to be

I think we've had this conversation before but I wanted to get opinions...

Do you see the difference between someone saying....

1. I'm sorry that I made you feel that you were less important that sports and running.

2. I'm sorry that I put sports and running at a higher priority than our relationship/you/us/etc..

Ready, I know sometimes I have acted in a way that makes it APPEAR I valued something more than my husband or kids -- like horseback competitions, for instance. The reality is that NOTHING is more important to me than my kids, but in certain instances, I know that they will live through having me gone for a weekend, and I think my riding has long term benefits for the whole family -- like me not going insane, or giving them an opportunity to bond with their dad, or whatever. So, I have used the "I'm sorry that I made you feel less important ..." line. The reality is that I did NOT put horseback riding at a higher priority than my relationship with them, but I recognize that is how they have experienced it on occasion. So, the second one would not be truthful for me to say.

Does that make sense?

TRIGGER WARNING FOR TALK OF DEATH.




I really am a mess this week.. I feel like I an on the edge of a panic attack all the time.. Its this whole, I don't know when H will be paid again, and a lot of death. Nothing too personal, daycare provider had a sudden loss last week, my BFF's father in law passed away suddenly last week, a students grandmother who was in good health took a fall and died two days afterwards. Death is a huge trigger for me... it reminds me that I am not in control.. can't handle it. Supposed to go to book club tonight.. I don't know if I will make it or not.

Healed - not going going to the book club if it makes you feel better seems, without more, harmless enough.

I find the concept of death for me comforting (being agnostic with a goal of atheism - I hope for a benign afterlife if there is one - which I hope there is not - but the nuns did have some influence over me I suppose) . With people and pets I am close to, I don't like missing them and I could do without the resulting sadness and grief.

wow this is a great way to put this into words MKAC can I hire you to speak for me lol. now if you could only speak as well on your behalf

(((( Healed ))))

want to change the status title under my name.any ideas please be kind

hi mue hows things

OMG, OMG, OMG......

I need some feedback on making a decision. I was offered an assignment that is absolutely and completely terrifying to me....but is an amazing opportunity. It's for a performance, so I'd imagine I'd be on stage....for a famous comedian. OMG. I would be teaming with the owner of my agency.

Knowing how terrified I am of being on stage and feeling inadequate, the idea of having the owner of my agency working with me, observing me, is terrifying....add to that, being on stage....add to that being on stage with a very famous person, potentially on TV and whatnot.

But SUCH an opportunity....considering I performed stand-up comedy, am an interpreter....it just seems like a sign that I was meant to do this....But yet the thought makes my blood run cold.

HELP!

you have done it with your comedy group and were great I bet you can do this no problem .I would go for it

(((Healed)))... do you think its possible to rethink your stance on medication? I thought you said it helped in the past...

MUE - what do you want help with?

Yes that makes sense for you and your situation. The situation I am referring to is very different.

It is an amazing opportunity! And you can totally do it, and you can totally rock it. You're right that it's practically gift-wrapped for you.

I know it's terrifying, but just say yes! That's the first little bit of courage you need -- the rest will follow .

My hero Eleanor Roosevelt would agree with me -- "Do one thing every day that scares you." This will cover you for several days!

My partner tells me I respond to the question or situation but not the emotional part of it if it is not spelled out as the real question directly. I don't know how I would know to guess about what part the asker wants responded to if they are not clear. We were at a gathering Sunday and it was interesting to see the split between those of us who responded to what the asker actually said and those who responded to a perceived emotional undercurrent.

My H ran every day for 15 years... 60 to 80 miles a week... used to have my kids in jogging stroller for hours at a time... it didn't matter if we were all sitting in the room all excited to be in Walt Disney World we had to wait for him to run... I had to wait to go to the hospital when I was in labor so he could run first because he had to run atleast 1 mile for his consecutive day running streak...

SD, good question. I'm struggling to figure out what I need. I hate making decisions like this. It sends me into pure panic mode.

My life would be so much simpler if I turned it down. I could breathe a huge sigh of relief...but also would feel disappointed that I allowed an opportunity like this to pass me by. But by taking the assignment, I would then have the next several weeks to freak out....but also try to prepare for....the work - even though it's difficult to prepare for something that you don't have any transcripts for. It's all fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants-and-try-to-keep-up stuff.

I could try to take action by watching youtube clips of the performer and interpreting them. That would be a proactive thing to do. The idea just terrifies me. ACK.

But as far as what I need help with? Umm, maybe some encouragement, ideas of how to make this decision, what others would do....maybe?

I have been thinking about it a lot lately.

The thing that confuses me is - why did the agency pick me to offer it to? I'm not certified. I'm a newbie in the field even though I've been doing it all my life.

So, I start thinking that either the rest of the people are just cruddy, or the good people aren't available, or she thinks that I'm more qualified than I really am.

MUE - I would think, from what you have written here, that you would be able to perform the task in an adequate fashion.
Is the fear based on who the performer is, the audience make up, the audience size, the fact that your boss will be there or something else? For what it is worth, I really don't find that most of the time people ask others to take on a task because they think that person will fail at it.

MUE...

I would do what you sort of just did... I would outweigh the freak out of saying yes versus the disappointment of not giving it a shot.

ETA: I think there is a difference between doing what comes natural and what is learned... in other words... a person can become bilingual and a person can grow up in a household who speaks two languages... I think the one who went to school to become bilingual may have the head knowledge but the person who grew up with it ...knows the slang... knows the short cuts.. has the tempo of the language, etc...

Thanks, granite. I have done it before - although only in front of 115 people in a room rather than thousands of people in a stadium. GULP. And even then, it was terrifying - and the open mics I did afterwards were terrifying. I ended up stopping because it was just too painful for me to have the continuous anxiety.

On the flip side, I don't have to come prepared to make people laugh...so that's a plus!

MUE I often don't accept invitations or do things out of terror. I miss out on a lot of things . I think you got this you have already been coming up with ways to prepare and take the stress off some. it is ok to be scared just don't let it paralyze you

Thanks, SallyBrown. I appreciate the encouragement. Courage. Definitely something I need to try to find. And I love the quote....I hope I can apply it!