Transference

I have researched this a bit and I find many different ideas. The simplest one presented to me was that transference occurs all the time and an example would be relating to someone in a positive way who might remind me of a beloved uncle or aunt.

Does transference *always* occur in therapy? Is it necessary for it to occur in therapy for the therapy to go well? Does or would the therapist orchestrate transference, set it up or encourage it in any way?

Although I like my therapist a lot I don't feel transference is there or is likely to happen. Possibly it happens without us realizing it?

Any thoughts, experiences, insight gladly welcome!

MY views on transference according to dictionary definition and as told to me by some of my therapists in my history of 19 therapists in the past 20 plus years -
http://myself.psychcentral.net/2006/...transferrence/

IMO transference is necessary for the therapeutic process. Perhaps it is this fact that makes it so difficult for those whose trust has been smashed by abuse, as they don't have any good, trusting relationship to transfer onto the Therapist?

I wouldn't want the bad transference to happen, but if noticed, it can be worked through. (For example, you yell at your therapist because that's the way you handle someone in your life. The therapist needs to show this to you while also not accepting this behavior from you.)

Thank you Sky.

I have not had close relationships ever. I worry transference won't happen. How do I get to where I can help it happen, if it is necessary?

Different varieties of therapy have different things to say about transference. Some varieties think that it is an essential part of therapy that the client has a transference response to the clinician. Sometimes clinician's actively encourage it, other times they don't actively encourage it although they expect that it will happen all by itself. Other varieties of therapy think that transference interfeares with theraputic work, however. They may deal with it if it comes up though regret that it has come up, or they may prefer to avoid it altogether.

Transference is when patterns of interation that we have had with figures in our past (e.g., parents, siblings, uncles, authority figures etc) are 'transfered' into patterns of interaction with out clinicians. We may have had a parent who was very controlling, for example, and thus we may interact with our clinician under the assumption that the clinician is controlling (just like our parent) because we haven't learned other ways of interacting with people.

There is a positive / negative transference distinction but I'm not sure what it is based on. I think it might be based on emotions that you have in response to your therapist. Positive transference is when you have all these warm fuzzy feelings for them because they remind you of a person in your past, negative transference is when you feel removed or detached or apart from them (maybe even mad at them or disliking them) because they remind you of a person in your past.

With your latter comment... I wonder if you are thinking about attachment. When someone is securely attached to a person then they feel good when they are with them, they feel good when they think about them, they like spending time with them and think of them and feel safe etc.

I'm wondering... If it is that you don't have those good feelings for your t and if this is what you are worried about?

Sometimes... It takes time for that to happen. Considerable time in some instances. You say you haven't had close relationships ever, but you must have had relationships with your parent/s or caregiver/s? Or with a teacher or two? Maybe... It will just take some time for you to come to trust your t.

The fact that you seem to want it to happen... Is a good start.

:-)