It seems that not too many people cry in therapy... even after being with their T for years.

I cry all the time. ****, at times I cry the entire session.
I don't see it as a weakness, but a mix of my expression of pain, my personality type, and the fact that growing up I turned off feelings to survive... now they are crazy.

I almost don't care if the T is there of not. (except for the tissue thing)

Why don't you cry?

I didn't mean to limit the choices in the poll or insult the topic.... I really find it interesting when I read that people don't or rarely cry.

[unlockingsanity]

I try not to cry because I want to use the session to its fullest. I can cry at home, in private. It doesn't always work out like that, but that's what I try to do.

[Leah123]

I cry all the time too, mostly for all the reasons you stated. Maybe you could add an option to your poll to represent those of us that definitely do cry in therapy.

[sweepy62]

I cant cry I think that emotion has been taken over by anger, my t is working on emotions.

At first it was hard to cry in therapy ... But now that I've come a good ways in the process I'm able to do so freely and without guilt, embarrassment or shame!

It's a freeing experience once we finally get there!

I used to not cry, I think because I dissociated so often and so deeply that I avoided feelings rather successfully. Once my T helped me be able to stay more present in session, the tears started to come. I can cry now without embarrassment for the most part.

[SheHulk07]

I hate crying in front of anyone, because for me it's a feeling of being weak and vulnerable. We're working on that.

[atomicc]

I have only cried once because it embarrasses me and I'd much rather cry in private than in front of T. Though I have no problem crying in front of anyone else...odd.

[photostotake]

For some reason I can cry in front of my ED T no problem, but not my personal T. I fight it for all it's worth. Funny thing is, I trust my personal T more than the other one. For some reason, I'm really embarrassed to cry in front of him and don't want to appear weak. Trying to get over the vulnerability and humiliation of crying in front of him. The few times I've gotten teary in front of him, we see it as a small victory. He had to hand me a tissue the other day- that was a big breakthrough!

[rainbow8]

I think it's due to inhibitions which relate back to my childhood. No one ever shamed me for crying; I just grew up in a family where emotions weren't expressed so directly.

I very much wish that I could cry with my T. I can tell her anything, and I can feel my feelings with her, but I can't cry with her.

[archipelago]

I wish it were easier for me to cry. I don't see anything wrong with it and don't really understand why it would be an issue in a session. The emotional release that comes with crying is very powerful and healing. I have cried on occasion, but for me, the barrier comes from being "trained" as a military brat to be like a samurai. So while I've become way more expressive about a range of things, it is still difficult for me to cry, even privately.

[Puglife]

I have a really hard time expressing emotions. I wish I could cry in therapy. I think my T would be amazed if I did. I can cry at a sappy commercial, but not when dealing with my emotions.

[BlessedRhiannon]

I can easily cry in private, just not in front of other people. I learned very young that you're not supposed to cry in front of other people, or let people know that you're sad or that something has moved you to tears. I'm slowly learning how to express those emotions in front of T, but it's very hard.

I can shed tears of laughter or joy in front of others pretty easily, but tears of sadness or just sheer emotion...nope, not quite there yet. I'd like to be able to, but it's hard to break the rules I've lived by for nearly 40 years.

[Daeva]

You don't have to cry, people express things differently. I only cry once in a great while. It's been three months since T has seen me cry, even though we've worked on tough topics ever since.

[Aloneandafraid]

I really wish I could cry/release some emotion. I just can't for some reason. I so want to though. I don't understand why I can't. I feel so low and desperate. Have had many bereavements this year, son in a serious car accident, lost my job. I just feel numb. I wish I could have a good cry in a safe place and maybe I'd feel better.

[nicoleflynn]

Did you know that different tears have different components? Tears of pain have healing properties.....tears of joy....don't.

[archipelago]

It is so sad to hear so many say that they can't cry but want to. I feel that pain. And it seems to come from different things, but a lot from early experience to not feel okay about it. That is very sad. I wonder why that happens. It seems the full range of expression should be what we all aspire to and is our right as human beings. To be so deprived of this basic right seems so wrong.

[IndestructibleGirl]

I don't/ can't. Apart from five seconds of losing control in the first session, where my face might have twisted with tears - that's it. All my sadness and pain scuttles away and hides when I try to look at it directly.

I break down in other less than ideal situations though. On the tube. In a shop. My face just leaks, and if strangers notice and are kind about it it gets worse. Always pretend my contacts are playing up

Something I've never really understood though is why tears are meant to be healing?? How does that work? I have never found it so, and I sob silently through the night on a regular enough basis.

[ShrinkPatient]

Originally Posted by atomicc

I have only cried once because it embarrasses me and I'd much rather cry in private than in front of T. Though I have no problem crying in front of anyone else...odd.

This is true for me as well except I've cried twice. I am a crier but I do it at home and mostly alone.
It especially bothers me to cry with my T. I think I view crying as totally losing control and that is the last thing I want to do in session.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Freewilled]

I cannot seem to cry in front of my T...I have had tearful eyes but its so fleeting. It's like a wall goes up. The problem is - I would LOVE to be able to cry. I told him once (after he asked me what I was feeeeeling) that I felt like I needed to cry but I couldn't. He reflected back, " You feel like you want to cry, but you can't?" He looked so compassionate as he said that and I know I looked in so much pain

I am in pain, though. I cannot cry half the time (I can never cry with T) even by myself. If I do cry, there is a healing quality to it but almost as soon as I'm done, it's like I can feel the wall build back up and the pressure starts to build behind it...

I told my T "It hurts!" Cause it almost literally/physically does.

Was taught not to cry, got punished for it.

[stopdog]

I don't cry. It just does not come up. I would stop it if it did, but so far it has not. The therapist did go on about it for awhile, but the thought caused me so much anxiety I finally got her to stop. It is considerably improbable, but not impossible, and the idea of crying with the woman in the room is an awful one to me.

[growlithing]

I try really hard not to cry because it feels embarrassing and weak to me. However, since being in patient, I've been allowing myself to cry in front of my T partially because when I'm having a bad flashback, the other staff would run get her to calm me down. A particularly bad flashback often makes me cry uncontrollably out of fear and I think because I have cried in front of her, I feel more comfortable doing it again. But in front of my other T, I do not express any emotion whatsoever.

I cry. The first yr or so I hid my face. I would be like 'you happy now im crying'. I've moved on now from that childish defence.
When I'm talking about things I never know I'm going to cry. But when I suddenly feel the tears, I turn my toes up, bite my bottom lip but they come and now I'm glad they do. I know I've touched something in myself. It becomes knowledge.

[rainboots87]

I've cried a lot in therapy, but I'm a very sensitive person and many life situations often make me tear up. Heck, small moments in movies and books make me cry. It's just the way my body reacts to stuff. I don't think crying is necessary in therapy though, because we're all dealing with different issues.