Where do you look during sessions with T ?

I hardly looked at my therapist. I do that with most people. I have actually tried to change that and use sessions to change that...but it didn't work. I look I guess within my thoughts whatever I am visualizing and where things are as I am reflecting back.
I think that is normal.

I have looked at him a few times...

...and one time we stared at eachother for about 5 minutes in silence. I do not know why. I looked up and didn't say anything and he was just looking at me....and I got caught in the gaze. Do not know why that happened. I wondered...I don't think I ever did that before to anyone...

I just looked away as it felt uncomfortable...

So mostly I look on the floor and all around the office.

I design little patterns with my eyes in my room. I draw mental lines to connect certain points around the room to each other. I imagine if the paintings on the walls were painted differently. I imagine what if the walls were painted differently.

I get very nervous when I have to look at her directly in the eyes because then I'm more aware of the fact that she is constantly watching me plus I'm really REALLY good at reading someone's facial expression and when her eyes are so full of concern, I glance up occasionally to accept her compassion but looking at it constantly makes me feel both uncomfortable and guilty.

If I'm telling her something important that I haven't told her already, I will give her full eye contact because I want to experience her full and honest reaction to me. She pulls me back into her sometimes too.

Yesterday, I was quite dissociated and I looked at my T for an entire few minutes straight. It was odd because it was very clear that she wasn't used to me doing that and I was just kinda watching for her reaction to that. She seemed to appreciate it at the same time as finding it a little odd

I might have to start doing skype calls with LCM and I'm nervous about that. I'm nervous on Skype calls because I don't like to see my face and I don't like staring at someone else's face and looking at her directly would mean looking at the webcam which is awkward. I feel compelled to draw/scribble when I'm not typing on the computer just to give my eyes something new to consider.

I have next to no eye contact with anyone. It's the same for A. He doesn't seem to mind. I do try to glance up once in a while though and once, we made eye contact for 2 seconds because I decided to look at him.

I look at the floor, at the wall, or out the window. I look at T or make eye contact sometimes, but I generally am uncomfortable with eye contact.

Eye contact is okay when I am listening to her but hard when I am speaking to her. I am not actually sure where I look then but it isn't at her very much.

I look at T, with the exception of thinking - then I always look away to gather my thoughts (i think that's pretty normal though). I used to look at the bookshelf when I first started, and every now and then I drift there, but like someone previously stated. The connection is better when I look at her.

She doesn't always look at me either. She just goes with the flow; if I'm turned and looking completely away (usually lost in my head by this point), she tends to kind of stare off as well but it doesn't affect the conversation.

If we are just talking about everyday life then we make eye contact although she also looks at my body language and facial expressions. She knows I often have a hard time telling her my feelings and emotions. She has figured out how to "read" me and often says something like okay your body language is saying something different and will ask other questions to get to the truth.

If it is something painful I can't make eye contact in which case I look at the patterns on the rug or my coffee mug. I have noticed for those painful discussions I need something in my hands to play with and focus on. If I look over at her sometimes she is looking at me other times she is looking on the floor etc.

I think though it is normal not to make eye contact during painful discussions and therapists don't say anything because it is about what is comfortable for you

Have any of you ever googled "eye contact". I have and I learned it can be a powerful tool. I am still new at using this tool. In the past I avoided eye contact at all costs. Now, when I look at T, I actually want to keep looking at her because her eyes are full of reassurance, but I kind of feel rude if I look at her too long. Often, I close my eyes to gather my thoughts, or look about any where.

I once read that if two people hold eye contact for more than 5 seconds, they are either going to kill each other or make out. I look at my therapist a lot of the time. I try not to do it as much because it can be construed as threatening or negative.

where did you read that?

Sent from my HTCEVODesign4G using Tapatalk

Rarely do I make eye contact with my T. Oh boy. It's just a thing with me, I guess. It's much easier though when he's talking as opposed to when I'm talking.

Sent from my KFJWI using Tapatalk