Couch 75

tametc · May 19, 2014, 12:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leah123

Anyone on this couch inspired to do my homework for me? Remember: helping others is therapeutic...

Nice try.

May 19, 2014, 01:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

Yes, I do not mind laundry, but I despise ironing.

Ditto. I have very few pieces of clothing that require ironing.

Sorry to hear about your arm, mkac.

granite1 · May 19, 2014, 06:14 AM

MKAC sorry about your arm . I hope it isn't keeping you from riding.

granite1 · May 19, 2014, 06:14 AM

no homework or ironing for me either

Aloneandafraid · May 19, 2014, 06:35 AM

Hi All. I'm struggling. Haven't seen T for two weeks and I am so mixed up. I desperately feel like I need/want to see her or reach out to her but I am afraid I will annoy her if I text her. I just feel such a nuisance, a waste of everyone's time and I know everyone around me is fed up with me. She won't reply anyway so there is no point. I hate feeling like this. Does anyone relate?

I hope everyone else is having a better start to the new week?

Thinking of you all. I have tried to keep distracted but I feel like my head is going to implode. I just need some support or connection - I don't know?

Sorry - I am just wasting everyone's time.

May 19, 2014, 07:24 AM

You are not wasting anybody's time, Aaa. And yes, I relate completely to every word you wrote (except that my T is a he, but I feel exactly the same about reaching out and annoying and being a waste of space.)

I have been playing with a web toy called wordle (at www . wordle . net ) which creates word clouds of pieces of text. I ran the two letters I sent to T last summer through it. It created a couple of interesting clouds...

May 19, 2014, 07:37 AM

hey granite, how are you today?

May 19, 2014, 08:06 AM

Does anyone mind if I practise what I am going to say/write to my T on Thurs here? He said i need to take risks so i am going to tell him something I feel shame about.

May 19, 2014, 08:12 AM

I tried to but I don't think I am up for that sort of risk yet. I will write down and give it to him i guess.

May 19, 2014, 08:12 AM

Hi Mast and AAA.

May 19, 2014, 08:17 AM

Hey BPA. Sharing shameful stuff is hard and no fun. They say it's good for the psyche to do so, though.
And few things we are ashamed of are remotely as shameful for anybody else as they are for us.

WikidPissah · May 19, 2014, 08:26 AM

Hey all...
MKAC...sorry about the arm. Broken bones hurt. I should be getting my boot off this week, and I can't wait. I was able to dance at a wedding yesterday, so there's hope.

I actually love to iron. I'm sure that doesn't surprise anyone. It's relaxing to me. I love the smell of spray starch on H's work shirts. mmmmm.
I hate dusting though. Drives me nuts. Especially our staircase, it's got white wrought iron twisties and turnies, I can never get it perfect. Grrrrr. I also hate cleaning the car, for similar reasons, too many tight little spaces that dust and dog hair get trapped in.

Pretty boring here in wikiland these days.

granite1 · May 19, 2014, 08:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mastodon

hey granite, how are you today?

he mast .I guess I am doing ok .putting some thought into writing a letter to my T for tomorrow .kind of a continuance of last weeks session. some of the things I was having a hard time saying .maybe she will understand it if it is in writing.

stopdog · May 19, 2014, 09:05 AM

Granite- may I offer the caution that the therapist understanding may not equate with her agreeing.

tametc · May 19, 2014, 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aloneandafraid

Hi All. I'm struggling. Haven't seen T for two weeks and I am so mixed up. I desperately feel like I need/want to see her or reach out to her but I am afraid I will annoy her if I text her. I just feel such a nuisance, a waste of everyone's time and I know everyone around me is fed up with me. She won't reply anyway so there is no point. I hate feeling like this. Does anyone relate?

I hope everyone else is having a better start to the new week?

Thinking of you all. I have tried to keep distracted but I feel like my head is going to implode. I just need some support or connection - I don't know?

Sorry - I am just wasting everyone's time.

You're not wasting my time. Sorry things are so rough for you right now.

May 19, 2014, 12:55 PM

There is no hope for me. None. I officially give up.

tametc · May 19, 2014, 12:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mastodon

There is no hope for me. None. I officially give up.

What's going on, Mast?

May 19, 2014, 01:00 PM

Reading the wrong things, getting confirmation that my views and my outlook on life is objectively wrong. And I've wasted a whole day doing almost nothing. And no, it's not okay to do that. My best friend tells me that I enjoy feeling lousy, and he's probably right, because I'm sure as hell not doing much of anything to fix it. And I have the perfect life in every way so why am I feeling like this? It must be because I like playing the martyr.

I'm txting T to cancel tomorrow. I don't deserve to see him.

RTerroni · May 19, 2014, 01:05 PM

I never thought that my Therapist leaving me would have such an emotional impact on me.

May 19, 2014, 01:07 PM

I'm sorry, RT.

someone321 · May 19, 2014, 01:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mastodon

Reading the wrong things, getting confirmation that my views and my outlook on life is objectively wrong. And I've wasted a whole day doing almost nothing. And no, it's not okay to do that. My best friend tells me that I enjoy feeling lousy, and he's probably right, because I'm sure as hell not doing much of anything to fix it. And I have the perfect life in every way so why am I feeling like this? It must be because I like playing the martyr.

I'm txting T to cancel tomorrow. I don't deserve to see him.

I hope you didn't cancel... You do deserve your T! Please do not punish yourself twice for the same thing... (Once because you already feel bad and the secon time by not going to the session)

RTerroni · May 19, 2014, 01:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mastodon

I'm sorry, RT.

Yeah its hard, we still have 3 sessions left though (the first of those on Wednesday).

May 19, 2014, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by someone321

I hope you didn't cancel... You do deserve your T! Please do not punish yourself twice for the same thing... (Once because you already feel bad and the secon time by not going to the session)

I decided to wait an hour, and in the end I did not cancel. Thanks for your support.

I've taken the evening off, and am watching a documentary about Calvin and Hobbes, which is cheering me up.

CantExplain · May 19, 2014, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by healed84

So here I am.. after a fairly stable two months, here I am back to the place where I see no hope, no future, etc. T and I texted back and forth a bit this afternoon, and he assured me that we working on this pattern of being fine and dipping back to the bottom. When, I saw him on Friday he reminded me that he wouldn't see him next Friday because his practice is moving into their new building on that day, but assured me that I could text if I needed him. When we were trying to figure out what was going on with my daughter and I emailed him to tell him I wouldn't be able to make it in on our regular day as she had a medical test, he said I could see him that afternoon, he texted me to find out if my daughter was ok out of the blue last week.

Remembering all of these times he has been there for me, his encouragement, his sometimes "tough love," him sharing his expertise, his nonjudgmental attitude reminds me of what a great T I have. Like, I truly lucked out. And the thought crossed my mind this afternoon when he told me these were the things we are working on... What if he can't help me? What if I have had the best T on the face of the earth and I just can't be helped. What if I am just wasting his time, my time, and my money? Or- what if he finally decides that I am beyond his capabilities and terminates?

I HATE tough love.

CantExplain · May 19, 2014, 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mastodon

Reading the wrong things, getting confirmation that my views and my outlook on life is objectively wrong. And I've wasted a whole day doing almost nothing. And no, it's not okay to do that. My best friend tells me that I enjoy feeling lousy, and he's probably right, because I'm sure as hell not doing much of anything to fix it. And I have the perfect life in every way so why am I feeling like this? It must be because I like playing the martyr.

I'm txting T to cancel tomorrow. I don't deserve to see him.

The story goes that unhappiness is caused by old pain, not new pain. So having a perfect life now doesn't compensate for what happened in the past. More therapy required?

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