Couch 78: Put your feet up and stay a while

WIKIwikiwikiwiki!!

Wiki!!!!

We miss you!

Wikid - good morning.

hey my beautiful friend

I am making a veg soup out of a ton of vegetables I had in the fridge and baking a loaf of bread.

I want to jump out of my skin .I am freaking out about everything . I don't know how to feel I want to be numb . I cant handle life right now when will it let up . god I just suck as a mother wife and daughter . so so selfish.

Wiki good to see you!!!!

granite i'm sorry you're struggling so much right now, hugs to you and sending good thoughts your way...

Sending hugs granite. Take good care of yourself.

Sitting in my hotel room in Tulsa with my feet up, ahhhh it's a nice room a suite actually, with a kitchen that even has a dishwasher! (can you tell I don't travel much?) I'm here for a week, for work. I need to get up off my butt though and go find the office building here, so I'm not out there in morning rush hour tomorrow feeling completely lost. I hate midwest humidity, btw. Blech!

Enjoy your week in the hotel suite, art!

wow have a good time maybe even room service is in order lol

I always feel guilty getting room service in case i inconvenience people.

Making a list of furniture I need for my new place. Does it say something that the first item I wrote down was bookcase followed bt beds and wardrobes?

I've never used room service because of the cost and would probably feel weird too if I did, like, who do I think I am using room service? They don't have it here in any case, as nice as it is, because there are a bunch of restaurants right around the hotel that even I can't get lost driving to and back. One is close enough to walk even in the heat. And the office building is only 4 miles away, a straight shot up the highway. Yay!

I'm especially thrilled with someone else cleaning the bathroom, making the bed, and washing the towels! can you tell i don't travel much?

I say enjoy every minute of it just remember when you get home and leave your wet towels on the floor they will still be there later lol

Thanks for checking in. Made my day.

There will be a card in your hotel room listing restaurants that deliver.

to anyone who remembers me...

Hi Sila - I remember you. Welcome back to PC and the couch.

Hi sila!

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

WIKID!!!! Hope you will hang out on the couch a bit and bring us more up to date!

I have never been so glad a weekend is over. I read you were having trouble also, granite, and I am so sorry. I was right there with you in the 'I am so horrible and selfish' camp and I just kept thinking about how much better off everyone would be without me. I was lying awake at 2 am every morning since Thursday. Today will give me an opportunity to fix one of the things at work that I ****ed up, and then I have court this afternoon and I'm supposed to see a friend tonight after her first day at a new job. Tomorrow I see T.

I am embarrassed to admit to T how horrible things are inside my head. Last time I told him about lapsing back into being suicidally depressed, he was not actually helpful at all. It was at least partly about him, but he told me that saying I was that depressed about something he had done was "bull s hit" and had some other, deeper reasons. I pointed out that I had never tried to say it was all him, and that there was a bunch of stuff happening all at once, and he then acknowledged that was true. So. I probably shouldn't dwell on that one, though. It was just a bad time and a fluke, right? I have to think he will be helpful this time, especially because it doesn't have anything to do with him. He is a much better therapist when I am not talking to him about him.

Good luck with it MKAC. A defensive therapist is not pleasant. I hope he does better this time.

He'll be fine, I'm sure. It has nothing to do with him this time. Mostly, I think I am embarrassed at my weakness in sliding off into the pit again and letting things get to me too much. I am just so DONE with this ****. I wish I could just be a normal person.