The Couch Get's 86'd (it's now under the end zone at Giant's stadium)

That's strange. In this country you can rent an apartment with a credit card alone.
Or are you looking for subsidised accommodation?

*looks around*

Can you see me?

Hmm... No. But that's ok.

Just feeding baby. Trying to stay awake while I feed her. Tired.

Somebody who knows me better than anybody except my T, and who has met my H a few times. [edited to add: I'm sorry, I realise that all this is TMI. I wasn't thinking clearly last night. Today I'm a little better, or at least less stunned, but I feel a deep blanket of sadness over everything. I know that nobody knows what my relationship is like better than I do, so I can't take somebody else's word for it. But still.]

Morning couch.

I'm sorry. That sounds really rough, if you don't like it. For me, that situation would be ideal. But I'm sorry you have to live in it.

When this couch went up I had to look up what "86'd" might mean. New expression for me.

I've heard good things about Elementary. Do you like it?

Hmm up again. Baby girl isn't sleeping well tonight... And she doesn't really want this bottle.

And I had a bad dream. Really messed up.

I am awake.. Pretty sure I got my D's germs! No fun, I don't want to be see during our week off from school' I really hope it is just a cold and not strep!

Morning mast! I hope you have a good day today!

Yuck. I hope it's not strep too.

I wonder what would cause such a dream. Dreams make no sense to me.

Are there any theories on what causes dreams or what they mean?

This one really has me wondering. :-/

Why am I awake at 6 on Saturday when my brain and body fight so hard against it on weekdays?!!! A nap is definitely in my future today.

Got a quiz and a test for my history class today, stressing about it, keeps me from sleeping! At some point I've taught myself that staying awake worrying is preferable to sleeping like a rock; letting my subconscious deal with the stress through dreams while I get some much-needed rest sounds much better!

Good morning couchies! Have a wonderful day!

PS: Mast, I'm sorry you're feeling so down right now! You are not disgusting and you aren't in your marriage alone. Your H sticks around so he must be content. Hugs!!!!

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Wow excessive overuse of exclamation points=way too tired to be posting. Sorry gang!

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Thank you. I know that he is, because I trust him when he tells me so. My friend's point was not really that H isn't happy with me (I mean, my friend can't possibly know that!), but that he would perhaps be much happier with somebody else. And he only says that kind of thing to try to prove to me that I could choose to leave if I wanted. Unfortunately, it's really not helpful for me to hear that, and it certainly doesn't mean that I do have that choice.

What's better for YOU? You are going on the idea that he is more important. That's incorrect logic. Does he pee gold? I am sure he is a wonderful man, but you matter as well. I challenge you to find ways that you are just as good as he.
sorry! It's like Jimmy Hoffa...swimming with the fishes...wearing cement shoes. We should be speaking gangstah up in here.

did I ever tell yous guys I knew Whitey Bulger? Yes. a million times probably. I could be swimming with the fishes just for saying that.

My nasty viral cold thingi that I got from my daughter is getting worse. I've dropped the sage tea, black elderberry syrup, netti pot and homemade remedies. I went out to a 24 hour pharmacy last night and got the big guns. MUCINEX, PSEUDOPHEDERINE, TYLENOL, and some weird nasal spray. Hell, didn't know they made half this stuff. But HELLO...it's working!

All chemicaled up, we have a giant Alberta Clipper coming it, and I'll be under 2-3 ft of snow by morning. Pass the vicks.

Good morning Wiki... I'm glad the OTC chemicals are working.

I thought of you when I saw the weather map for this storm... They were talking about transporting snow to snow farms and bringing in melting machines...

We've only had a brown winter here... Wish we could take a little of the snow you guys are going to get. No snow here usually means water restrictions in the summer...

They have snow farms melting 380 tons of snow per hour.
And it's -10 (°F) that's about -23 (°C)
Crazy.
I need to send H to the store...they must have some chemical concoction for the craps. I know, TMI. Every orifice is suffering.

Yep they do... Hope you feel better soon. Think I'll search for pictures of a snow farm.

Get this.... I've been thru a lot physically, so I'm kind of a big baby. I freak out, I think every thing is cancer. Anyhow...I take immune suppressants. When my doc gave me them he told me that I needed to be careful and so forth. They lower your immune reaction, so it's easier to get certain types of cancers. He was very adamant that if I ever run a fever I need to call him or go to the ER. Well, I called him yesterday, said my temp was 102.5 °F and I caught the viral infection my D has. (he's her doc too).. He says, "there's a lot going around, drink fluids and rest. Anything else?" I said "um, no....thanks." Grrrr.. I feel like a freakin moron. Big time. Whiny baby.

Bah... And up again. Baby girl doesn't want mommy to sleep much.

But that's irrelevant! I asked him to marry me, he agreed, we are married, and it is up to me to make the best of that for myself, as well as for him. Yes, I can see that logically, that is also up to him, but since he doesn't know that I'm not happy, he has no responsibility to do anything about that.

And I have no idea how things could be different anyway, and any change I could imagine would be for the worse. My T refuses to believe me, but it's true, I can't see how anything could change for the better in my relationship. Hence, what I need to do is make myself content with the situation. After all, everybody always tells us that we are the perfect couple.

This makes me think of an episode of my favourite (British) radio show, where they played sound charades (like regular charades, but since it's on radio, they speak instead of act), and one team had to illustrate The Sopranos. They spoke in high-pitched voices and swore a lot; all the swearing was beeped out and one of them said towards the end "We'll be bleeping with the fishes!"

While writing this I've been listening to various sound clips from the show - I wanted to see if I could find that particular one on Youtube, but I didn't - and I've been alternately giggling and laughing for ten minutes. Which made me feel better.

No, you're not a baby. So there.
And I'm glad the over the counter stuff is helping.

I hate the way mds do this. We have been experiencing this "call us for anything unusual" US: "What is unusual?" THEM: "Fever, throwing up, gi distress, skin not healing, etc etc etc" US (calling due to several of those). THEM "Oh there is a flu going around call us back if it gets worse (after her throwing up 6 times and having diarrhea and so on)
THEN when we go in for an appointment, she describes a really really bad skin reaction she endured (which 2 of them saw the beginnings of and made no mention of) said "Why didn't you call us? That is not usual. Call us for anything unusual"

I walked out in order to not punch him.

That's infuriating, sd. I hate doctors who expect you to be a mind reader, while they themselves don't listen properly.
And I hate it when they talk down to you. I tend to avoid MDs for that reason. On those rare occasions when I need prescription meds, I can ask my T to write a prescription. It's only happened twice in the almost three years I've seen him.