Transitional object

Has your T given you a transitional object? Was it during therapy or when you ended therapy with your therapist? Did it help you? Do you still have it?

I told my T that I was struggling with losing the feeling of our in person connection when I am not in sessions and she gave me a gemstone that was sitting in a dish on a table next to my chair in her office. She told me to hold onto it and remember how connected I feel to her when we are in session. It has helped me so much. I cherish it since it came from her.

My first T sought supervision when I asked her for one. She later said No because she didn't want "to promote dependency".

Sigh, all I wanted was for her to choose one out of 5 of my favourite marbles to give to me.

I haven't asked current T, because she didn't answer when I asked her for a photo of her. I ended up finding her public instagram for pictures of her.

I think an object would make me feel special, valued and cared for, and maybe my therapists don't want that for me... :/ I would want somethin she thought of and gave to me.

I'm really happy that you asked for and got your object even as your therapist was considering giving you one!

My T has given me several. The first was a carved stone otter. This was when I started to get deep.into my trauma and I had the dream about the otter . she said it was to rimd me of our connection. She also gave me a storybook called "StellaLuna" about a little fruit bat. When we were working on some tough stuff a bat came to her I'm a dream and helped her understand how to help me. After the dream "StellaLuna" became my nickname from her and then before she left on vacation once she gave me the actual book to read whenever I wanted. She gave me a note that is rolled up in a tiny silver capsule when I was going to be gone for a while.
And most recently she gave me Edgar the stuffed otter because of the changes to texting so I would feel loved.
Each of these things are terribly precious to me and they do help me to hold on to our connection...

Previous t's have given me stones one t and I did art together for our last session, and she gave me the piece she was working on. Current t (when I saw her a few years ago), would give me a small turtle statue to "take care of" when she went away on vacation, but I gave it back when she returned. I still have one of the glass stones given to me by my first therapist. I used to carry it and another glass stone, but I lost the second one. It slipped into the center console of my car. I have Torn apart the car more than once looking for it, but I have yet to find it... I'm still holding out hope that it will be found before I get a new car... even 18 years later, I hang on to them/it.

how lucky.

T has nothing like marbles in his office...
i would be happy even with a PEN...but hmm..no dont have it. didnt ask for it. and wont ask for it.
i have his pictures i got from internet....and they really do help alot...
he doesnt know i have them saved on my phone.

No, but I am not big on such things even from people I am fond of. Mostly I don't know what to do with such things - I put them on shelf and they get dusty or in my pocket and they would get misplaced or something. And I don't really find the woman reassuring in any sense or connectable- so an object reminding me of her, even if did so and I did not forget why I had a rock or something, would not be useful for me.
Having said that - from what I have read by those guys - some seem to find it quite usual and helpful for the person in therapy.

I haven't asked current T for one. She knows I will ask because she knew how important it was for me to get one from ex-T. I don't need one from her yet. I'm able to hold our connection for a week with no worries. I do, however, have photos of her from online and emails.

From ex-T, I got her favorite book. It's a tiny book filled with quotes from her favorite author. I had to fight to get that book. Part of me thinks she gave it to me just to make me shut up and go away. I also have pictures from online and emails from her.

My ex-T from 10 years ago gave me a beanie bear (I keep it above my head) and an angel ornament (I keep on the dashboard of my car. I also have a picture in a picture frame from her.

One of my college counselors also gave me little crystal rocks. She called them warm fuzzies because when you hold them in your hands they warm up...just like her presence would if she were there. I have no picture of her

I have a lot of transitional objects from a lot of different people. It helps me to hold on to the memory of them.

I think you are valued and cared for. You deserve those things. I hope someday you can ask your T for an object. I hope you get one someday.

I can't see my therapist doing this with me. I'm not sure what she's like with others, but she's probably closer with them so maybe she does. The therapist before her gave me a toy cockroach before she left. We argued about what it was. She said it was something else, but it was a cockroach. I can't believe I actually tried therapy again after that. I wish I'd kept it because the idea of it now makes me laugh.

first he would let me borrow a piece from his chess board if i was having a hard time. he suggested it. then one day he gave me a stuffed animal moose. i named it moosolini. i still have it 5+ yrs later. i sleep with it. earlier this year i was skyping with him and i showed it to him and he noticed the antler was missing. i had kept the antler even tho it fell off 4 yrs ago. he said bring it to session, i did and he sewed it back on. i also have a few gifts he's given me (poster, calvin n hobbes book, weird random things)

It's best if you choose the transitional object.
I evidently choose the box of tissues in the room.
Now I'm not going to carry them about with me, but I use to search them out when I was shopping.
That need has lessened, I can keep T inside me better.
I'm not sure T giving me an object from her choosing would have had any significant attachment for me. Our unconscious picks it's own objects.

I borrow things from my T's office when she goes away on vacation. The last two times she's let me borrow a little box with little people inside (they are super tiny). Today was our last session before her winter break and I asked her to write me a note and if I could borrow a favourite book of hers, both of which she did for me. It's going to be a long, painful four weeks but these things really do help me. And I love how I can hold onto the note forever!

My current t hasn't given me anything, but I feel very attached to the throw blanket he has in his office and he has joked about giving it to me when I am done with therapy. We have a routine where, when we are finished, he takes the blanket from me and folds it up, then helps me up and hugs me. I think the important thing, is that I chose the blanket. I've had previous therapists offer rocks or other things, but they've never been as meaningful to me.

Omg, what a lovely T. And he can sew! He's a keeper

My T has never offered a transitional object. I don't know if I'd want one now, but I would have really valued it last year.

No, and I don't need or want one. Therapy isn't about the connection for me.

My second therapist ever gave me a little butterfly shaped magnet thing. She slways said I was learning to fly like a butterfly (I think I was 21). That was the most agonizing ending I've ever been through, and why I don't believe a ""termination process" leads to less painful endings. I clung desperately to that stupid butterfly for over a year until the pain lessened and I started to feel angry with the whole therapy process. I didn't get how she could leave me on my own (punlic mental health), when I was still cutting bad enough for stitches

The one after that gave me some polished rocks with words on them. "Love" "peace" "joy" and something else. She said to hang onto them and know that's what she was wishing for me. But she also said we could email, and after the first email, I emailed her again 6 months later at Christmas and got a "sorry, will email you when things are less hectic," and I never got that answer, 8 years later. I threw them out during my last move.

My last unethical one gave me a stuffed animal to borrow when I had surgery. She hurt me so badly in the middle of that, that I insisted she take it back before my second surgery because looking at it was hurting me too much.

The one thing that I have and always carry with me isn't really a transitional object or from a therapist. I'm very close to my pastor and she's always been there for me (she has a daughter my age and she's very caring). I'm also a theogy student. We both love a female mystic from the middle ages (Julian of Norwich), and she has this beautiful quote about the world being like a hazelnut,

Anyway, so before surgery when I was scared and really sad and hopeless, she brought me a hazelnut and a copy of the above quote, and told me to keep the hazelnut in my pocket so I can reach down and touch it and know I'm loved. I still have the quote in my wallet and the hazelnut in my change purse so I can hold it when I'm really hurting or when I need to remember she cares about me and I'm a child of God. In a way, I guess that's sort of a mindfulness thing. But it does help.

After my last session with ex-T, I wrote her a letter expressing my emotions about losing her (out therapy) and her illness and how it affected me. I was hoping, so so badly that she would respond with a note, even just few words, but I got nothing. Current T only told me what ex-T said to her and that was "Wow, there's a lot of emotions there!". That's it. I was so disappointed that was all I got.
I have a couple of pictures of her. One from her obituary listing on the internet and one from her daughter's facebook page.

I think it's nice when, if you need something, a T recognizes the benefits and can offer you something.

My t has given me a couple of crystal rocks that collect darkness, and a couple of other rocks (can't recall their purpose). I like to carry one of the darkness collector rocks in my pocket, just because. I do treasure all of the rocks though, not just because they came from t, but because rocks are powerful and awesome in general.

My T has never offered a transitional object, and I don't believe he ever will. He's pretty old school. Haha! I just read old emails when I need to feel connected to him.

My T gave me a stone that meant something to her that I carry around with me. Also in session she'll hold my stuffed animal sometimes and help me with my things. I know they are my objects but to have her touch them, in an odd way I guess it's comforting that her 'energy' can come home with me because she touched my stuff. Therapy makes me think weird things :/ ...

She gave me a silk bed cloth from a psychodrama we did. I love to wrap up in it on cold nights, and in cold airplanes. I use to carry it at other times for security, but not anymore. My mother would not allow her babies to use object for security. What if it were lost! She didn't want the headache.

Having had a transitional object and other self-soothing techniques I learned in therapy helped me in my healing journey. Now, I don't need a transitional object, because I have cemented an internal attachment figure. What I'm left with in overwhelming times are the images and FEELINGS that get me through.

My T has never given me anything tangible, and I don't think she ever would. I would love it though, if she did.

When I mentioned that I thought a transitional object would help me, my T (who was already thinking the same thing) started suggesting different things in her office she would be happy for me to hold onto. She felt it was important that I pick the object. She had first offered a pillow from her couch but I said I needed something more portable. She then showed me the gemstones that were sitting in the dish on the table next to my chair and I picked the biggest one that looks like a crystal. I am glad I got to pick what it is. I also had her hold it during a session so she could put her positive energy into it.

My t has given me many, many things over the years.

Today my T gave me a transitional object, and I didn't even bring it up! She's going on vacation soon, so she thought it would be a good idea. I asked to have the necklace she always wears, and she gave it to me. I plan on wearing it every day until she gets back (when I might have to give it back to her). I'm so happy she gave it to me