Couch 153: Couch slouch

I worry about all of you!

The SD knows how to hand me a straight line. Ilk is an instant joke generator 'round these parts. Then "game" was like adding cool whip to the oddly flavored oreo!

My dad, who was totally depressed, always used to tell me: laugh and the world laughs with, cry and you cry alone. I never understood wtf he was talking about. you cant say stuff like that to a nine year old.

But, you are paying to be paid court to?

No, I am paying the therapist to pay them court! (From their perspective.)

Hope you have a good session, Summertime.



...and hope yours went well, Cake!

Thank you.

Yes he does have a box but i don't like using them all up. I cry heavily and don't seem to stop.

Thank you Luc.

It was tough. I told him that I hated him but then I really didn't but just wanted an excuse to leave him. Because it was getting too uncomfortable. I cried a lot.Talked about suicidal feelings but he said that he made a commitment to me and nothing I said would change that.That he wasn't going to walk away. That I didn't have to go down a set path, I could change. That I was struggling with uncertainty about school which starts next weekand being able to cope and fit everything in.

On a side note-
an advert for free lucozade in todays metro paper made me think of you.

I would not use a therapist's tissues if I ever needed one. I don't cry around them- so it has not come up -but I believe that using one's own is a better plan. Or take a handkerchief.

((Cake)) that sounds really hard. I hope you're looking after yourself this evening? Or that someone else is looking after you!

It's interesting what you say about the tissues. I told T yesterday that I didn't feel like I could cry, that I feel like it bothers him now, because on multiple previous occasions he has encouraged me to take more tissues... and that has made me feel like he must find me snotty and disgusting. Last week, for example, he said if I kept crying into my hands I would have 'hands like rainclouds' (yeah, weird metaphor).

He seemed surprised and said that he was trying to let me know that it was okay to cry, and that I could use as many tissues as I wanted. Which now makes sense to me, given your feelings about not wanting to use them all up. It hadn't occurred to me that other clients might feel that way.

So, he intended to make me more comfortable by encouraging me to take tissues - perhaps you might have found that helpful - but instead it had the opposite effect... I heard him saying 'eww, clean yourself up'.

Oh, just saw this bit, haha

I've never cried in therapy so far, but if I would... I'd probably get my shirt completly wet before even thinking about using his tissues...

I use t's tissues. She almost always has at least 2 boxes within my reach and a little trash can next to the couch I sit on. I also drink the water she has in a pitcher on the table between us. Aha - maybe she spikes it with some therapy-addiction-inducing chemical. Just kidding. I think...

I would not actually ingest anything a therapist had sitting out or offered me.

I think I need to go to the eye Dr. While on a call this morning, I got this sudden stabbing pain in one eye and almost said Ouch! out loud on the call. After that call went to the restroom to look at it and it's all red like I'd been rubbing it or something. I'm like what the heck. Eyestrain I imagine, between overtime at work and studying, and maybe I need new glasses? It was such a sharp pain - as if a bee sting my eyeball. Oh the horror of that thought.

"Be curious, not suspicious."

Just taking a break from chores and caught Dame Judi Dench on The Talk, shes plugging her new movie, (queen) Victoria & Abdul. She said that in the movie, one of the queens advisors says the above line, and Judi liked it so much she had it embroidered on a pillow.

Thought it was a good line for t in general.

I take this to mean we should stalk our therapists?

Rather than fit them into our personal games of Clue? "Info, in the billiard room, with the latex gloves!"

Are you sitting on a feather?

(Somebody asked me that once, i guess because i was giggly. Its a cute line, isnt it?)

I use both T1 and MC's tissues (haven't cried in T2's office yet). But both of their trash cans are in awkward places, so if I use a bunch I end up either holding them or piling them on my lap. Once, I think MC could tell I was about to be really weepy, so he put the trash can in front of me and said it was so I didn't have to hold the tissues in my lap. I'm sure that makes shaking my hand at the end of session really appealing!

Oh, that's what that is?

"Una's t, in the kitchen, with the Eiffel Tower statuette!"

"The woman, in the library, with just a touch!"

"Current t, in the ballroom, with a paddle tennis racquet!"

I could go on, you know...

You have no idea how on the ball you are! (It's the best I could come up with, really.)

Current T told me in the last session that she's played a lot of Clue with her kids (don't ask how we got on to the topic) and I stared at her clueless coz I didn't know what Clue was (still don't exactly and I think I'm blissful in my ignorance). I think she saw my blank expression and clued me in that it's a board game.

Watch the 1980s movie, then. Christopher Lloyd, Eileen Brennan...

Is there a feather in Clue???

Yes, great movie!

Sure...in the feather pillow art's t uses in the study.

It's on her drum, not in a pillow