Couch 173: The Odiferous One

Its not stupid. I always picture your t as my fairy grandmother. Now thats stupid.

Sometimes its better not to say anything.

Eta - okay. I cant believe i just said that. Wheres my medal??

The eye pressure puff machine at the eye doctor is what finally alerted docs to what turned out to be shingles in my eye. If it hadn't been so high, they would have sent me home with a there there. So even though it's intended for glaucoma, it can alert to any kind of problem that causes inflammation and pressure.

Great appt with the chiro today. He said not to wait the next time I leave and have pain, that I'm supposed to turn around and go back until he can get it resolved. He said he can't get to the deeper issues until we get past my defensive armor (protection from a back fracture)--which makes it sound a lot like therapy, only easier to understand.

I usually go to bed really early, but tonight I'm on emergency call for work for the first time in a really long while. I have T at 9am, with the Reddit situation just pending in space so I would like to have my wits about me as House says. I bet I end up going from work to T- which has never happened before. I really appreciate everyone who calmed me down. I am starting to see if not the humor, then the silver lining that at least he cared enough to think about my case. I was writing about him too right here. To me, it is a sad loss of opportunity to connect in a genuine way about something that was worrying us both, but with the goofball intervention of social media, I did get my answer in a round about way. Maybe I will mention it on my last session ever ( hopefully that won't be tomorrow on no sleep!)

My best line about the therapy boat metaphor:

Are you now going to embark on a life of crime and litigiousness so you can keep seeing her?

she can seem kind of a grandmother when she gets angry with me and im not freaking out about it . you know when it is over with . i know she gets angry because she cares and i am so stubborn about letting her in . like i will never tell her i miss her .tomorrow will be a month sense i have seen her and i am to call on wed to seeif she will be in the office next week

New T for H was okay. But he's too old. And his office is in his home, which is a trailer, has no AC, and has steps up to the house. My H can't do steps. Also, his house was a mess.

Back to the drawing board.

Eta: My H now thinks he's going to die in 6 month

It's unfortunate that this therapist won't work out, but on the bright side, he went.

I'm sure there's a good one out there Scarlet.

I don’t think I earn enough to see both her and Blondie — so I’m thinking that maybe I should launch a case of therapy-gone-bad against Blondie and hire the lawyer for it?

Ahhhh...

Unexpected 3 hours of overtime added to my shift today. Welp, it will pay for a therapy session....

You can now advance to the next level of your edumacation.

ugh lol....

I admit sometimes with my freelance work, I think, "OK, that article I edited paid for x number of T sessions." (I get paid by the page.)

Whereas I think every time I write Info a check, “I could have weekly massages for what I pay her each month.”

I'm sorry, Scarlet. I certainly wouldn't be comfortable in that environment (the no AC would have been enough for me!) I hope he's willing to see someone else and that he can get an appointment soon. Could your T recommend someone maybe?

I'm guessing his ER visit from the aorta turned out to be nothing?

Oh, I think about things like that, too!

Current t's place is non-profit so I don't have to pay anything but when I paid a t before I had similar thoughts.

Me as well!!

Recently, as I’ve been looking for new jobs, I calculate distance and work hours to see if I could fit my therapist into my schedule just in case I try to go back. Gah, it’s so frustrating, and I don’t want to think that way— but I immediately do. Every time. Any job that’s 8-5:30 automatically makes it impossible to ever see her again...

His aorta is fine. The doctors did discover his heart is enlarged. So that's why he thinks he's going to die.

That made me laugh a little. In therapy, I often compare therapy and chiropractic care/massage, and have said that the body work is a lot easier to understand and deal with.

And I'm not sure which has been most instrumental in my healing. Hmm, I guess they complement one another.

My therapist's idea was to start opening boxes on the days before we are to meet. First box opened contained a set of wrenches, unused; a drill I bought him for christmas, battery MIA; some miscellaneous stuff that I have no idea what it is; some screws; a razor blade covered in some black oily substance that I considered using on myself; some led mood lights that I had on our mantel. All covered in house fire soot. I think my therapist should be the proud new owner of an 18-piece wrench set covered in black soot. His idea, he should get the first spoils, eh?

When I was little, our house burned down. The smell of the smoke stayed on some of the boxes my parents had until my mother died almost 40 years later and my dad sent stuff in the boxes home with me and my sibling and tossed the boxes away.