Couch 188: Who needs those people, anyway?

i used to bring my own dog for every session. i loved it. it helped lower my anxiety

My former T used to talk about her cat but she never brought him to sessions. Of course I have cats so it was something we could bond over.

One of my old ts asked if I wanted to meet her dog and I said no. I just wanted to focus on therapy.

It could be distracting at times no doubt but T was fine with it because he said you can't push someone to talk, they will when they are ready. So he welcomed distractions.

I know with a woman, I'd struggle, even just walking in to vent... but If there was a dog I could lay on the floor and pet, I could put my mind in the "talk to the dog about your pain" mindset rather than "ok, here's a lady, good luck"

Info suggested I bring the cat to session once. Also to court when the divorce hearing was.

Info is clueless about cats.

Don't most cats hate riding in cars? I love cats, but I've never had one myself. If I did, I wouldn't torture it by making it ride with me in the car to therapy or court. Plus, lots of people are really allergic to cats - more so than dogs (I don't know why this is...). Seems inconsiderate to other clients to bring a cat to the office and have it rubbing up against the sofa, etc.

Maybe she's not good about checking her email, or if you emailed through psychology today, the email associated with that isn't the one she uses anymore. I would try calling and leaving a message.

I have too much to talk about in therapy today. I don't know where to start. I hope I don't just sit there.

My boss got her surgery date. She expects to be out four weeks. I'll be doing her job and mine while she's out. I'm confident about 95% of it, but that last 5% that's the rub. Stress level increased!! Kit

My T didn't cancel today. She said her former colleagues at the university counseling center were complaining on Facebook about having to go in when classes were canceled. She said she thought about saying, "I could cancel because I'm in private practice, but I love my job!" and then decided against it because it was too Girl Scouty. I told her that instead she should brag that she could wear jeans today because it isn't allowed at her former workplace.

So yeah, workaholism wins. The mail isn't even being delivered today, but my T was still in her office.

I see it this way: I don't think a T should ever text you anything that can't be made public.

I'm well aware he wasn't "supposed" to do that, but none the less he did.... and I loved it. Since reporting him and getting him in trouble isn't my goal, there is a lot I will keep private.

I like to take text messages, pictures, cards, etc. to show my T. It's usually faster just to show her rather than trying to explain it, and sometimes things stick out to her that I hadn't noticed or thought about. It's sort of one of those "a picture is worth a thousand words" things. So I think you should share the anonymized texts with Spike just to give the therapist a better sense of what your relationship with him was like.

I too think sharing a bit of the text messages may be helpful DP_2017. My former T asked me to share with her some text messages that someone was sending me that was harmful to me and I did but I wanted to protect that person's identity so I somewhat understand your feelings on that. But seeing it there in black and white helped my T understand. Hopefully, if you choose to do so, it will be helpful. HUGS Kit

Thanks so another question. I did something I think is illegal... but with no bad intention. I recorded my final session on my phone without T knowing, not for any vindictive reasons but to hear his voice and laugh again. It's provided with me with alot of comfort.

Anyway... would I get in trouble legally in therapy if I brought this up? The only reason I would is there is a few things I would like to share that were said but I want to know I am 100% sure on what was said and not somewhat remembering so I thought I'd say something like "I listened back to the audio and it's exactly what he had said" I haven't decided yet if I am gonna do this but it's just a maybe but I'm more scared of getting in trouble.

I also printed up 4 screen caps (3 copies, one for each T) of a few text convos.

Legal or illegal depends on the state. Where I live it's a one party consent on recording conversations. That being said, I did ask my T once if I could and she said no. I have not done so even though legally I could.

Yep, I was going to say the same. In mine, it has to be 2-party consent if it includes audio. Just video (like surveillance, nanny cams, etc.) is fine.

What do you want the Ts to say to you? I'm just being curious. It's a good thing to take in texts I think. I frequently show notes etc

I probably wont do the audio mention, just to be safe although my state does say 1 person consent. I just feel like they would assume I'm lying if I was "Trying to remember" a session from almost 2 months ago... but I guess I don't much care. Most of what happened in the final session I'd never share with them anyway

It might help you to ask the therapist specifically when they would break confidentiality by sharing what you say with a third party (police, licensing boards, etc). The circumstances are very specific and generally involve ongoing risk of harm to you or other people. So even if it was illegal to record the session, there is literally nothing they could do about it. You could confess to committing felonies, and as long as there was no reason to think anybody's safety was at risk, they still couldn't say anything to anybody about it, even if they wanted to.

Hi couchies, well today was as challenging as I thought it'd be 12 hrs ago but I did not completely flake out which is good.

Also most proud that I didn't go walking in the vicinity of his office, i.e. that im not turning into a stalker :0 which is always a good thing, and I went to my evening commitment even if I only literally just went to the geographical location but did nothing once there, and I thought though some of this stuff likr a functional person instead of burying it or ignoring it.

So some success there. What my doctor would call a steady state of wellness. But crikey being well is painful.

I suppose I'll be seeing my T on my birthday after all...

Didn't you already have plans with a friend? Did you cancel them for t?

No, no plans for daytime, getting together with parents (plus H and D) for dinner, but that's not affected.