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  #626  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 01:58 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WarmFuzzySocks View Post
OH. I just had a thought that made me feel way better: I am a perfectly competent adult, and I am going to buy myself an electric chainsaw.

Last storm, we had a bunch of large branches come down. I thought, "I can handle that on my own," (because I totally could have) and I went to the home improvement store and bought a little electric chainsaw with the help of a lovely helpful woman who happened to be working in that section when I came in. Seriously, it was tiny and she had a similar one at her house that she used for yard projects, and one of my friends has one she says is super easy to use. But it freaked the kids' dad out, so after I came home with the chainsaw, he hired the neighbor's yard guy to cut up the branches. Naturally, he told me about it after he'd hired the guy, who kept forgetting or getting busy, so it took him a month to get to it. I didn't feel like arguing with the ex about it so I let him take the chainsaw back to the store so he could use the $ to pay the yard guy.

I didn't realize until just now how much that stupid little thing bothered me. What a silly thing to feel freed over: I can own a tiny yard machine like a totally capable person, without hearing that I am going to cut my foot off.
I don't think that's a silly example.

I would say your house you rules.He doesn't get to make the choices anymore. Your more than capable of doing the yard stuff.
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  #627  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 02:02 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
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Location: Seattle.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NP_Complete View Post
The letter my therapist gave me yesterday as he was leaving for July vacation #1 really warms my heart. I think I'll wait to open it for a day or so.
Aww that's really nice of him.
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  #628  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 02:06 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
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Location: Seattle.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by atisketatasket View Post
No. 1 retiring is really bothering me. I just broke off with her in a snit and never went back.
It's okay to feel the way you feel.

What was your snit about?
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  #629  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 02:14 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
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Location: Seattle.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CantExplain View Post
My brain is not at full strength. No serious harm done yet, but I'm making too many mistakes.

Sickness, changed medication, bad weather, approaching holiday, creeping senility? I wish I knew.

I'm certainly not having any trouble sleeping.


It's okay to make mistakes and to rest more when you're ill.
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  #630  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 03:15 AM
Anonymous42961
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And now my African drumming lessons aren't on but she never told me the last I heard from her was last week when I said see you on the 4 July for the lessons and she said great
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  #631  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 03:16 AM
Anonymous42961
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I am rapidly talking myself out of this T I don't get to see him for another 3 weeks.
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  #632  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 04:27 AM
Anonymous42961
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I am just pissed because I have to tell my story again from the beginning why can't they ring my exT and get all my background information. I don't want to be repeating this **** over and over.
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  #633  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 05:26 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
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Location: Seattle.
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Maybe you can put together a brief outline. or copy older posts from here. and hand that out to him.
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  #634  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 06:09 AM
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LonesomeTonight LonesomeTonight is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lemoncake View Post
Maybe you can put together a brief outline. or copy older posts from here. and hand that out to him.

Yes, something like that could work. And you don't need to tell the whole story all at once in order to work with him. You also may not need to tell him everything. I found with current T, there was stuff I didn't feel as much of a need to tell him about early on because I'd already processed it some with ex-T and it wasn't as relevant to where I was when I started working with him. Versus when I started working with ex-T 6 years before that. I've filled in most everything over the course of the last 20 months, but it wasn't all at once, more as needed. And he had an intake form where I filled out a lot of the basics. Please give him a chance.

ETA: Also, regarding just using the 10 funded sessions, I'd just ask him if you can go beyond that if you want (I assume that just means you would pay?)
  #635  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 07:12 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
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Location: Seattle.
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R went to some special conference or something. Maybe an Oprah a'ha moment with his supervisor.

He was different- softer and much more reassuring, there was a lot more: "it's okay to cry. look at me, stay with me, feel the emotion, how do you feel?"

No fighting or arguing today. It was nice- he said I was putting him through this paces and causing him to confront his stuff.

.
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  #636  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 07:15 AM
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LostOnTheTrail LostOnTheTrail is online now
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I'm so glad you had that, Lemon. I seem to have inadvertently had two very intense days back to back. Intense writing workshop yesterday, and intense session today. The session ended up being intense in a different way than I expected, too.
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'Somewhere up above the great divide
Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few
A man can see his way clear to the light
Just hold on tight, that's all you gotta do...'

Steve Earle - Fort Worth Blues

'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin
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  #637  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 07:21 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BlessedCheeseMaker View Post
I am rapidly talking myself out of this T I don't get to see him for another 3 weeks.
BCM, try to hold on to the fact that you said you liked him. Maybe he could also possibly see you after the 10 sessions if you asked.

He sounds like a good thing for you, but there's still nothing stopping you from seeing if there's anyone else.
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  #638  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 07:22 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LostOnTheTrail View Post
I'm so glad you had that, Lemon. I seem to have inadvertently had two very intense days back to back. Intense writing workshop yesterday, and intense session today. The session ended up being intense in a different way than I expected, too.
Thank you Lost.

Is the workshop a regular new thing?

How are you feeling now?
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  #639  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 07:44 AM
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The workshop was a one-off, thankfully. I'm feeling quite tired. R remarked that I looked 'exhausted' at the end of today's session...I felt it!
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'Somewhere up above the great divide
Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few
A man can see his way clear to the light
Just hold on tight, that's all you gotta do...'

Steve Earle - Fort Worth Blues

'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin
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  #640  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 07:55 AM
Anonymous43207
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SheHulk07 View Post
I'm late, but happy birthday Artie!
Thank you! And you're not late on USA time, It's 5:53 am on my birthday right now for me!
Thanks for this!
SheHulk07
  #641  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 08:00 AM
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LostOnTheTrail LostOnTheTrail is online now
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Happy Birthday, Artie! May you have a wonderful day.
__________________
'Somewhere up above the great divide
Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few
A man can see his way clear to the light
Just hold on tight, that's all you gotta do...'

Steve Earle - Fort Worth Blues

'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin
  #642  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 08:08 AM
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LonesomeTonight LonesomeTonight is offline
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Happy Birthday, Art!
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  #643  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 08:08 AM
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CantExplain CantExplain is offline
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Location: New Zealand
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BlessedCheeseMaker View Post
I am just pissed because I have to tell my story again from the beginning why can't they ring my exT and get all my background information. I don't want to be repeating this **** over and over.
Each time you tell it, it hurts a little less.
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Add that to your tattoo, Baby!
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  #644  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 09:46 AM
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atisketatasket atisketatasket is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WarmFuzzySocks View Post
OH. I just had a thought that made me feel way better: I am a perfectly competent adult, and I am going to buy myself an electric chainsaw.
Taken out of context, this might seem quite an alarming statement.
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  #645  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 10:17 AM
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unaluna unaluna is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ArtieSwimsOn View Post
Thank you! And you're not late on USA time, It's 5:53 am on my birthday right now for me!
Your birthday is a national holiday! I look forward to Trump mentioning it in his speech tonight!
  #646  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 10:28 AM
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ScarletPimpernel ScarletPimpernel is offline
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Happy birthday Artie!
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  #647  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 10:45 AM
ChickenNoodleSoup ChickenNoodleSoup is offline
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Happy birthday, Art. Hope you have a wonderful and fun day!
  #648  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 11:29 AM
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atisketatasket atisketatasket is offline
Child of a lesser god
 
Member Since: Jun 2015
Location: Tartarus
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Quote:
Originally Posted by unaluna View Post
Your birthday is a national holiday! I look forward to Trump mentioning it in his speech tonight!

Which reminds me of the most interesting thing I’ve learned so far today: tanks are called tanks because in order to hide their development of them from the Germans in World War I, the British referred to them as water tanks in their communications.
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  #649  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 11:32 AM
Anonymous48774
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Quote:
Originally Posted by atisketatasket View Post
No. 1 retiring is really bothering me. I just broke off with her in a snit and never went back.
What would bring some closure? Does Info know her well? Maybe she can mail a letter from you to her or something?

Maybe just processing it here and with Info will help
Move past it. Maybe if Info can’t get a letter to her-it would still help to write one and then perhaps just send it to where she used to work..knowing she would never actually get it?
Thanks for this!
atisketatasket
  #650  
Old Jul 04, 2019, 12:08 PM
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atisketatasket atisketatasket is offline
Child of a lesser god
 
Member Since: Jun 2015
Location: Tartarus
Posts: 19,394
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jersey 4 View Post
What would bring some closure? Does Info know her well? Maybe she can mail a letter from you to her or something?

Maybe just processing it here and with Info will help
Move past it. Maybe if Info can’t get a letter to her-it would still help to write one and then perhaps just send it to where she used to work..knowing she would never actually get it?
Well, yeah, I think this may be the topic of our next session. (Info does know her professionally though I don't think they're friends. No. 1 recommended Info to me, in fact.)

I was actually fine before I knew she retired--I had had a couple years ago what art's L would probably call a closure dream (No. 1 and I were sitting talking in a gazebo in the autumn) and I did send her a letter thanking her for everything.

But, here's what brought the whole topic of No. 1 up. I've been decluttering and I found a stuffed animal No. 1 insisted on loaning me for my surgery fall 2015. I tried to return it before leaving the country temporarily that winter, and she told me to hold onto it and bring it back when I was seeing her again. I stuck it in a box (never really wanted it in the first place, she just kept insisting). I found it in the same box last month. I mentioned it to Info, and that I was going to mail it back to No. 1, and she said, "oh, you can't do that, she retired."

So part of the problem is I feel like I shouldn't have this loaned stuffed animal, but now I have no way to get it back to her. Info said I could give it to Goodwill, but I feel like it's not mine to give away. Then Info said No. 1 probably doesn't mind at all, and it's OK to keep things from former therapists even if they were just loans (or you helped yourself to them--I guess a client once took a shiny pebble from this dish Info has on her table).

If anyone has any ideas about the stuffed animal and what to do with it, I'm all ears. I really can't buy Info's "it's OK to keep things from former therapists even if you're not supposed to have them" thing. If I could solve that or feel better about it it would help.
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