Extremely upset after receiving new diagnosis

hopealwayz · Jul 17, 2019, 03:23 PM

T and I got into a debate about my new diagnosis and I’m having trouble accepting it. I cried all session. Then when I left the office, I pulled over and sent an email saying that I’m not going to live with this diagnosis.

They must have gotten concerned so they called the mobile crisis unit to come to the house to check on me.

I’m having a rough day.

Omers · Jul 17, 2019, 03:59 PM

It can be really difficult when we disagree with T or Pdoc about what’s going on. Try to remember that you are not a diagnosis (weather it is right or wrong) you are a person. The diagnosis it just a word they use between themselves to try and help better. Sometimes as therapy evolves so do perceptions and diagnosis...

Taylor27 · Jul 17, 2019, 04:28 PM

Hugs try to remember you are not the diagnoses and it's ok to not agree with it either. I hope everything will be ok hugs

hopealwayz · Jul 17, 2019, 04:50 PM

Thanks so much.

I think what is frustrating me about him right now is that I’m trying to open up and give him some more pieces of the puzzle including some painful things and he isn’t even paying attention to that.

hopealwayz · Jul 17, 2019, 04:52 PM

I want to talk to him about some painful memories but it’s hard to get in that right moment with him.

hopealwayz · Jul 17, 2019, 04:59 PM

He is a good doctor and I’ve been doing better this past year with him.

The T that I had before him was a joke. He always told me that I was entertaining so that lead to me going into session with him and trying to be entertaining. What a waste of time and money. Therapy isn’t about entertaining the therapist. I’m so glad that it ended with him last year. And he was encouraging friendship even when I told him that I still needed therapy.

I’m grateful for current T. I don’t know how to prove to him that I trust him. He doesn’t believe I trust him completely.

Jul 17, 2019, 05:00 PM

Not sure I'm clear. Do you disagree with the dx or is naming it unacceptable? Remember it doesn't change anything or you...wrong or right. They could call it bananas if they wanted.

SlumberKitty · Jul 17, 2019, 05:04 PM

I'm sorry you are going through this Hope. It's hard when we don't agree with a diagnosis. Just remember you aren't your diagnosis. You are so much more than that. The diagnosis at worst is just a label. At best its just a way for professionals to communicate with each other. If you are concerned it is going to change your treatment progress, keep talking to your T. HUGS Kit

hopealwayz · Jul 17, 2019, 05:32 PM

I don’t want this to ruin therapy with my T. I have to find ways to deal with it so I don’t end up walking away from T.

hopealwayz · Jul 17, 2019, 05:35 PM

Even with my first pdoc, I took the diagnosis names so personally and he tried to explain about it being a label and it’s needed for them to write prescriptions. They can’t write prescriptions without a diagnosis.

hopealwayz · Jul 17, 2019, 05:36 PM

I emailed my T the painful thing that I haven’t been able to speak about.

precaryous · Jul 17, 2019, 08:41 PM

Remember you are free to disagree with his diagnosis. You may argue about it...or you may chose to agree to disagree.

T’s sometimes get it wrong.

If he’s prescribing medication and you feel it’s helping, trust your feelings. Feel better.
If he’s prescribing medication and you feel it’s not helping, you have every right to refuse it.

About trust- trust is earned through trust-building experiences. You don’t need to give your trust away to him just to people-please him or to try to be a ‘good patient.’ You don’t need to give your trust away for fear of rejection. With everything you have been through he should certainly understand that concept.

hopealwayz · Jul 17, 2019, 10:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by precaryous

Remember you are free to disagree with his diagnosis. You may argue about it...or you may chose to agree to disagree.

T’s sometimes get it wrong.

If he’s prescribing medication and you feel it’s helping, trust your feelings. Feel better.
If he’s prescribing medication and you feel it’s not helping, you have every right to refuse it.

About trust- trust is earned through trust-building experiences. You don’t need to give your trust away to him just to people-please him or to try to be a ‘good patient.’ You don’t need to give your trust away for fear of rejection. With everything you have been through he should certainly understand that concept.

Thanks so much for that. I guess I felt scared to disagree with him. He didn’t listen to what I thought. It just felt like he was thinking that he’s the doctor so he was right.

I’m not sure what to do if we continue to disagree.

precaryous · Jul 17, 2019, 11:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hopealwayz

Thanks so much for that. I guess I felt scared to disagree with him. He didn’t listen to what I thought. It just felt like he was thinking that he’s the doctor so he was right.

I’m not sure what to do if we continue to disagree.

Hi,
I thought I read you’ve already let him know you don’t agree with his recent diagnosis?

T can call your diagnosis anything he feels appropriate.

Ok, here’s a small example from my T. She says I have Depression, Anxiety and PTSD. I agree with her first two diagnosis’ but I feel I also have C-PTSD. We’ve talked about it. I think she said C-PTSD isn’t in the current diagnostic manual so she uses ‘PTSD.’ I understand but I disagree. We aren’t fighting about it. I’m not changing T’s over it. It doesn’t change what we do in therapy.

Is it possible for you to still receive benefit from seeing your T if you disagree with him?

I’m sorry you don’t feel he listens to you. Sometimes we have to make a point of bringing our concerns to their attention in therapy. You drive therapy, not him.

You’re doing good work. Keep going.

hopealwayz · Jul 17, 2019, 11:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by precaryous

Hi,
I thought I read you’ve already let him know you don’t agree with his recent diagnosis?

T can call your diagnosis anything he feels appropriate.

Ok, here’s a small example from my T. She says I have Depression, Anxiety and PTSD. I agree with her first two diagnosis’ but I feel I also have C-PTSD. We’ve talked about it. I think she said C-PTSD isn’t in the current diagnostic manual so she uses ‘PTSD.’ I understand but I disagree. We aren’t fighting about it. I’m not changing T’s over it. It doesn’t change what we do in therapy.

Is it possible for you to still receive benefit from seeing your T if you disagree with him?

I’m sorry you don’t feel he listens to you. Sometimes we have to make a point of bringing our concerns to their attention in therapy. You drive therapy, not him.

You’re doing good work. Keep going.

I did tell him that I disagreed with the diagnosis.

I want to stay with him. I’m pretty sure we can get through this.

Jul 18, 2019, 03:59 AM

I was dx with bpd 17yrs ago when I began the mental heath 'game' . I cried and cried. Real snot too!
It all seemed so hopeless. Read up on it and yes me and everyone else in the world exhibut some bullet point dx.

When I got this T she just smiled when I told her. She doesn't do labels.

Now? They were wrong. Plus even if they weren't, there's enough of me now to care less what they think .
It's all about inner resilience. If you've got that, none of those things effect you. In fact they never could. I just didn't know that then.

Therapy gave me, me. Barely out of medical sch jumped up psychiatrists, counsellors, unskilled People that have never done their own in depth therapy arent to be taken seriously.

The mental health game is one big hamster wheel. You can step off at any point.

hopealwayz · Jul 18, 2019, 07:54 AM

I’ve considered leaving therapy all together.

However, my pdoc does my medications and he won’t let me go back to just med management.

But, I feel discouraged going there and paying only to be treated for a misdiagnosis.

I don’t know why he doesn’t just let me go back to med management.

ArtleyWilkins · Jul 18, 2019, 08:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hopealwayz

I’ve considered leaving therapy all together.

However, my pdoc does my medications and he won’t let me go back to just med management.

But, I feel discouraged going there and paying only to be treated for a misdiagnosis.

I don’t know why he doesn’t just let me go back to med management.

Med management alone without therapy, particularly with certain diagnoses, is generally not terribly effective. Can I ask why specifically you disagree with his diagnosis? What criteria do you feel does not fit your symptoms?

hopealwayz · Jul 18, 2019, 08:43 AM

I don’t meet enough of the criteria to meet the diagnosis and my T just seemed like he wanted to stick it on there without taking other factors into consideration.

hopealwayz · Jul 18, 2019, 08:45 AM

I think it’s also the fact that he acts like he can’t be wrong. I tell him often that he is close-minded.

zoiecat · Jul 18, 2019, 09:20 AM

Sorry you are upset over the dx Hope. Whether he is right or wrong doesn't really matter. Obviously you have symptoms you need help with or you wouldn't need meds or be in therapy. Regardless of the dx your T is treating your symptoms.

I know I was in huge denial when my T said I had DID. I still deny it sometimes. But I finally started taking his advice regarding treatment and I am feeling better, am in more control, and am starting to feel better. He has also adjusted how he treats me based on the dx so it ended up being a win win.

You said you don't have insurance so the dx is only between you and yout T. You also may want to consider the fact that he may be right. Sometimes it is difficult and we don't like the label, but admitting we have the problem is the first step towards recovery. At least that was true for me.

Jul 18, 2019, 09:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hopealwayz

I think it’s also the fact that he acts like he can’t be wrong. I tell him often that he is close-minded.

I don't understand how it works in your country. It always, sounds, like clients are being held hostage because they need this person to get meds?

Doesn't a therapist operate independently of this in your country?

All sounds a bit toxic to moi.

hopealwayz · Jul 18, 2019, 09:45 AM

My fear is if he’s right, I just don’t want to live with that diagnosis.

He’s smart. He’s younger than my last 2 Pdocs and they never mentioned this.

Maybe I’m scared to let him help because I don’t want to open up.

Jul 18, 2019, 09:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hopealwayz

My fear is if he’s right, I just don’t want to live with that diagnosis.

He’s smart. He’s younger than my last 2 Pdocs and they never mentioned this.

Maybe I’m scared to let him help because I don’t want to open up.

His smart? Yet closed minded? Which is it. I'm confused.

Crook32 · Jul 18, 2019, 10:07 AM

First take a deep breath. Then remember you are the same person you were before the diagnosis and after. Now you say that your last two pdocs didn’t diagnosis this but they also didn’t help you much. Maybe just tell yourself to forget the name and just focus on the symptoms. Tell yourself you will try this for a month and then reevaluate how you feel. You could even come up with a fun name for the diagnosis like pickle or something so that it doesn’t bring you down as much. Sometimes words do matter so if you can spin it to your advantage does it hurt to try? I know not the same thing but for me I was reluctant to try ketamine because I wasn’t someone who needed it is what I kept telling myself. So I delayed but in the end I tried it and stuck with it and it is the best thing that I have done for myself.

Remember you are doing this all for yourself no one else. You are in the drivers seat and make treatment decision. Best of luck.

Menu

My Support Forums - Mental Health Support Groups

Get emotional support and friendship from others like you!

Our community offers: No spam. No trolls. No social media connections.

Extremely upset after receiving new diagnosis

My Support Forums