Couch 218: Northern Minnesota 2050

mmm.......

I want brownies. Anyone have those?

Nope, still trying to recover from my "single serve" fudge binge week, when i got a six-pack of 3.4 oz cans of sweetened condensed milk from amazon. The cutest little cans ever! They were like tiny floating votive candles!

I have some biscoff and some sorbet in orange and lemon and coconut shells

I love molasses. Its so country and so elegantische at the same time!

And it is good for you - it has iron, potassium, and b-6. I sometimes put it in my coffee and use it on waffles. I have blackstrap and sorghum in my pantry all the time. I also like sorghum as a grain (although it may technically be a grass) - you can even sort of pop it for a snack like popcorn

From Costco? Those are delicious.

yes. This is the first time I have tried them

I have been waiting all day for a worker's comp quote at work. I'm off of work in less than half an hour and I still don't have the quote. We have to pick someone by the 31st at the latest because we need coverage on the 1st. Sigh. I hate insurance renewal time. It is so stressful.

I also have lemon cookies and oreo's--double stuffed, and thin, in chocolate and vanilla

My annoying cat took it to anothe rlevel this week. Most nights this week he has poked me inthe eyes at stupid o'clock in the morning and ran behind the wardrobe and waved his paw out the side.

Have you tried playing w/him to the point of him being worn out before you go to bed? It sounds like he just has a ton of energy that needs to get out. If you have a wand toy you can use with him right before bed, most likely that would be really helpful.

I havent taken my lithium for nearly 2 weeks now. I feel a lot better. Instead of sleeping for 10-11 hours and waking up dopey i sleep for 7-8 and wake up refreshed. I no longer have the weird weakness in my legs and the slight tremor and i can walk without my stick. The string of low level anxiety that ran through me constantly is nearly gone and i only get anxious about appropriate things instead of just about everything. I can read more than a few pages of book and can recall what i ahev read better. How come doctors never seemed concerned when i raised these things. I will keep an eye out for signs of mania but i feel normal again.

Oh he and the other cat have a good old race around the house after dinner and in the enclosure which has a tree in it. He is just annoying the kind of cat who will push something off the table to what will happen.

Its the reading thing for me. Ever since i have been medicated it has been a struggle with concentration to read. I usec to read several books week but the struggle to read on meds made it unappealing. I have made a huge dent on the 3 books on my coffee table. Yay,

This is what I like about DBT therapists or at least my DBT therapist. We talk about what to do when I feel bad a lot. And then when I inevitably forget the tools and strategies in a moment of total badness, she will email me suggestions. It's not just crisis plan stuff but more like concrete things to do to tolerate the feelings or change them.

Diabetic cat's blood sugar was much better, 135 this time. Vet suspects his weak back legs are being caused by arthritis now instead of neuropathy since his blood sugar's better, and wants to do x-rays possibly next time. He seems to be dealing okay with it, he is an old man at 13 so we don't expect him to be running around pell-mell like Penny does. We'll likely go ahead and do the x-rays and see what they recommend for treatment. I don't want him to be suffering. He doesn't seem to be, but she said cats don't show it.

This sounds hilarious, waving his paw out the side. Like he knows youre too sleepy to find him so hes helping you? Or did he get stuck and scare himself?

No he didnt get stuck but this morning i left the tap running for the washing up and he became quite distressed with the growing mountain of bubbles he cried and cried until i turned around.

Apparently, at the time of this morning's very short phone call, he hadn't gotten my email. He just now read it. That makes the call feel a little less crappy I guess.

Ortho doc said I don't need another surgery on my elbow - apparently I have tendinitis. It's a huge relief knowing that I didn't undo my previous surgery on my elbow.

I'm binge watching Graham Norton clips on youtube today/tonight for some reason. I like it when Greg Davies is on. He's got the best stories.

Congrats on your progress!

I found the same thing when I get/became really depressed. I just couldn't focus anymore. I used to get through around three books a week when I was a kid and reading was a real coping mechanism for me. Audiobooks were a magical discovery for me and they helped get me out of my own head in the same way.

There's lots on youtube if you don't want to join audible and there's librivox too etc.

I currently have Oprah's "what I know for sure" playing and I'd really recommend it to anyone. Lots of little nuggets of wisdom. (Next audiobook will be the pursuit of Happyness by Chris Gardner).

J texted me asking if he could give me a call. I found myself hoping he was calling to break up with me. He wasn't. He was just calling to make plans for this weekend. I hadn't started studying yet even though it was almost noon and he chided me for that.

I don't know; I just hate everything and my stomach hurts.

(I realize I am going on and on about this and I'm sorry--my IRL friends are sick of hearing me moan about what to do. Pls just ignore or block me or whatever if you've had enough.)

Why exactly aren't you breaking up with him, if that's the outcome you want?