Couch 235: Home State Advantage

Plus I'm at work for the next 6.5 hours so it's not like I can do anything drastic at work. The feelings and thoughts might change by then.

Hugs, Kit. I'd try reaching out to your T, even if you don't want to. Do you think contracting with her again could help? Though if you think you need to go to the hospital, maybe you should? I don't know.

I can see "convoluted" being an appropriate descriptor. I prefer to think it isn't fake. I think it's a real relationship. I forget if it was Scarlet or someone else who posted a few weeks back how we show different sides to ourselves to everyone. So who *is* the real person? Or does it only matter what that person was to you?

Could you just try to trust in your feeling that there was something magic? And found healing? I know that's easier to say than to do, and it might take time and distance from the relationship.

Artie - dont know if this helps, but my philosophy of t is, "What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas."

Yeah, I don't know either. I'm going to wait until after work, though I might text T before then, to decide about the hospital. A lot can happen between then and now and something might magically change!
I've been contracting since Monday but I don't know if it's making it worse or keeping me safe. Guess I need to tell that to T.

Artie, I don't think of the therapy relationship as fake either. It's not the same as non-therapy relationships, that is true, but the relationship is still real. It is convoluted. It's like seeing part of the elephant, like just the trunk and trying to describe what an elephant is. HUGS. Kit

Hugs, Kit. I agree with LT about reaching out to t even if you don't want to. Sending healing energies your way and hope your thoughts/feelings ease up on you and if you do get ahold of t that they're helpful.

Thanks Artie, I texted her even though I feel bad because I have texted her like every day this week! She should get paid extra for having to deal with me. I told her I'm at work so I am safe for x amount of hours and then I have aftercare tonight but that I would text her later either after work or after aftercare and let her know how I am and then we can decide about possible hospitalization. She hasn't responded yet but she is probably in session. I have learned when I don't want to do something when it comes to therapy, it means I really NEED to do something. So since I really didn't want to contact T, it meant I needed to contact T. Stupid the way that works but so far it is working for me to recognize that.

This is likely your 'wise post of the day', ms una. Both as a philosophy, and as advice as well. Thank you.

Based on this, inherited cat is my favorite. A take-charge, knows-themself kind of feline.

Confidence is sexy.

He is a giant orange killing machine. The last time he was stuck in the house for a few days due to weather, when the weather turned better I found four bird heads on the back porch. he is a tad old testament. Now he is in my lap accepting stroking. in a minute he will try to bite the crap out of me.

Obviously a direct descendant from Noah's Ark. He was simply sending out birdies to see if it had stopped raining yet.

Well, technically-biblically, i guess ALL animals are direct descendants from the Ark.

Hard to check on dry land without their heads

OK, that made me laugh.


Perhaps they were punished for not finding dry land?

I have been sober for twelve nights. Life is immeasurably dull without being drunk.

Congratulations and yes, yes it is. Dull is not as fun but it lasts longer. Which I know does not sound like a benefit at the moment, perhaps, but truly is. Right now I'm enjoying a dull afternoon break lying back in my recliner with a large cat on my lap.

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They are kind of in the moment sorts.
Not a lot of whining/navel gazing over what is the nature of good, is eating meat murder, what is our purpose in life, what if x, etc.
It is pretty much: feed me, pet me, walk me, shhhh I am sleeping, get out of the chair in which I wish to sleep -that sort of thing.

I wish I could be in my cats' head for a day so I could know what they are thinking. For Amelia I would like to know why she is so skittish. What she is so frightened of? For Helen, I just want to know why she runs up and down the hallway and skids into the dining room and skids into the bathroom. Like what's up with your hyper energy kitty? She does it manically a couple of times a day. Then the rest of the time, she rests like the Princess and the Pea in a pet bed on top of my bed. Precious.

Speaking of cats - Penelope is grounded again. H let her go out in the backyard earlier and was watching her until he fell asleep. I went out in the livingroom on my break and saw him asleep, and the back door open, so went out to check on her as she was not in the house. She was not in the backyard either, but I saw a shadow moving underneath the gate and knew it was her out there - so I yelled at her to get her butt back in the yard and she scurried under the gate and zoomed into the house. She's a wild one!

My old cat King (many, many years ago) when he was young used to zoom up the hallway to the front door, and jump straight up the front door, then hit the floor and run again. I think he was trying to attack the peephole....

I let my cats go out. They come back.

Guinea pigs do something called "zoomies," where they race around the cage at full speed. It's funny--mine will pause like they're done, then will change direction and start running around again. Like, "Nope, still have energy to burn!"

Well the zoom drum circle i was going to attend this evening got cancelled, so I guess I'll be crocheting instead! My google eyes I ordered came in the mail today so.... I present:

Why is Penelope grounded if she came when you called her?

The only problem I have had with the cats and dogs using the dog door that I have for when I am home but don't want to get up and hold the door open while the cat decides to go out or come it, is inherited cat sometimes brings in not completely dead but mortally wounded rabbits and other creatures. This gets the attention of the dogs and sometimes there is chasing. I usually just leave the house and let them handle it.