Couch 241: Twin primes!

Understanding ADHD has honestly helped me more than most anxiety treatment.i have always had anxiety and I go ages in between panic now. I credit that to EMDR but also I am on low level adderall. I cried so much understanding why I feel things so deeply sometimes and what that comes from so I guess I'm biased lol

I have read a lot about unmasking autism and adhd and it has brought a lot into focus. Including that I always try to hide my true feelings for the comfort of everyone else instead of wondering and tackling why those feelings exist. It's not that I give myself a pass to leak my feelings on other people, it's that I can tackle them and help me feel better which in turn stops me being awful to be around.

Understanding why I do things has helped me figure out how to stop them more than just being ashamed of how I reacted and how it affects people. I always felt like I understood the fights my wife and I had but powerless to stop being grumpy and I hated myself. Now I tackled why. I understand just how overstimulated I was ALL of the time and how to calm that down so now I don't blow up at people at all.

I know you have emetophobia too and interestingly a lot of people who have it are neurodivergent and it can come from a place of sensory overload.

I'm not saying we should all go around not thinking how we affect people and behaving how we do, I'm only saying that in some cases it can be helpful to examine why it's happening. Looking at that, with compassion, can really help calm your nervous system down and prevent it from the root.

My Airbnb has an induction cooker. It is perfect for making omelets.

*considers remodeling kitchen to include an induction cooktop*

Ex-hankster, find another doctor.

Lots of sadness today. Unfortunately.

Hugs, Kit. Would it help to talk about it more?

Thanks for the hugs. I think I'm just depressed. I need to snap out of it (unrealistic I know!) I have four of my sister's children at my parents house so when I get off work I gotta be in a better mental state. (My parents are there too so it's not like I am solely responsible for these children.) I don't know what is causing it but it might just be my sister because she keeps stressing me out with issues with her boyfriend, issues with her finances etc. I can only help so much and I'm not the best person at compartmentalizing things. So when she is complaining or just talking about these negative things, I take on all the stress of it. And I have trouble not feeling whatever emotions come up from all the stress.

Going through a depressive episode at the moment. P keeps pushing to go back on fluoxetine. I don't even want to feel better right now. I feel like I should want to feel better, so I'm having feelings about my feelings. He's going on vacation next week and brought up doing video sessions and I don't want to. I want to just hide and let everything come unraveled. I feel like a burden.

Thanks for the hugs. I think I'm just depressed. I need to snap out of it (unrealistic I know!) I have four of my sister's children at my parents house so when I get off work I gotta be in a better mental state. (My parents are there too so it's not like I am solely responsible for these children.) I don't know what is causing it but it might just be my sister because she keeps stressing me out with issues with her boyfriend, issues with her finances etc. I can only help so much and I'm not the best person at compartmentalizing things. So when she is complaining or just talking about these negative things, I take on all the stress of it. And I have trouble not feeling whatever emotions come up from all the stress.

Going through a depressive episode at the moment. P keeps pushing to go back on fluoxetine. I don't even want to feel better right now. I feel like I should want to feel better, so I'm having feelings about my feelings. He's going on vacation next week and brought up doing video sessions and I don't want to. I want to just hide and let everything come unraveled. I feel like a burden.

I started taking my psych meds after stopping them for a couple of weeks, a couple of weeks ago. I was noticing depression / sadness during the day, and jumpy legs at night. So back on the prozac and topamax, but at fairly light doses. Im in pain that comes and goes, but at least i dont want to unalive myself because of it now.

Sending you love Una bean. I hope the depression and sadness eases up with starting the meds again.