*~*Worthless Session!*~*

I see T once a week now for 90 minute sessions. This is due to her retiring/cutting down to two days a week/me moving/etc.

Today, my appointment was from 1030-12.

10 minutes into the session, her cell goes off. She apologizes and says she needed to answer. There was some sort of crisis the other night. So she spent about 10 mins on the phone.

Then, had to make another call, regarding the same crisis to another person.

Then, someone else called as she hung up to reschedule or something.

So about 15 minutes later, she settles back in. By now, I've lost my place and feel kind of shaken. But we start talking slowly.

1130 rolls around and she apologizes but said she really needs to sit in on a call care conference for a few minutes. Another 15 minutes of her talking on the phone.

Usually, we go right up until 12, she ended at 1155.

Now... I'm trying to be all ok about this. I know stuff happens. But I can't help but feel like crap. It was a worthless session. I was nothing but a side thought the entire time. My trauma, my struggles, my feeling of brokenness meant NOTHING, someone - something else, was more important.

Just like I've always heard, always felt - when it comes down to it, I will be the one to be pushed aside.

It wouldn't have been so bad if she asked to only have a 45 minute session - but that's not how it went. All the interruptions and breaks threw me off completely from concentrating. It was so pointless, and I felt like an idiot the whole time.

Not to mention it's a 90 minute drive one way.

I'm quite pissed off. I've been having such a hard time, and she has limited contact between us so much. In all that mess, no wonder I didn't mention, "By the way... I'm extremely suicidal".

Yeah, thanks.

Wow. That would really hurt. I think you have a right to be pissed. Can you call her? Can you use the anger to curb the depression? I don't know if that's good or not, but I try to use it sometimes.
Be good to yourself.

this is so unproffessional.........

(((((((((((((((huggies))))))))))))

any way you can find a different t? you deserve to be treated so much better......take care hon, we all care here .... Jinny xooxox

((((((((((( StormyAngels )))))))))))))))))
A session like that would really upset me too.

OUCH!!!!!!! That is horrible, and definitely unprofessional. Please take care.

That is definitely unprofessional and would really %#@&#! me off too. I'd definitely start looking for a new T, since it sounds like she's trying to wrap things up too.

I know starting over with someone new is hard and scary, but you deserve a T who will give you their undivided attention in your session.

--splitimage

(((stormyangels)))
I would find it very hard to be interrupted like that. I can see why you would feel pushed aside. Although I probably would be able to do it myself, you should probably find a way to tell your T that her handling of your session was not acceptable. Maybe share your perception of how the interruptions affected your train of thought and your ability to talk about a very important issue. If I could do this it would likely be in written form, where I wasn't there when she actually read it. I'm a chicken, I admit it.

She called me this evening.

I told her how I felt. I told her I felt I was just a side thought, and that the session really threw me for a loop.

She was very, very apologetic but said she doesn't know that in this situation that she could have handled it differently. I didn't know if she could have either, the way it went down, but I told her it still hurt.

She said she cares about me (us) a lot. She spends a lot of extra time with us (the 30 minutes of 90 is pro bono) and does try to meet our needs where she can.

After being with her a year and nine months she hoped that I would be able to handle this. I told her I thought I did rather well. I typically have a "borderline" response of she hurts me, so I hurt/jab back at her. I wanted to, more than anything. But I ended up just laying it all on the table to talk it out. She was really helpful, and proud of me. She knew it still hurt, and apologized again for how the session went.

In a half cryish half laughing way I said "Well, atleast this is sort of a life lesson that shows me your life isn't perfect, you've had a pretty crappy couple of days!"

We laughed about her making mistakes and being human - something we always joke about because I want her to be perfect! One of my littles told her in a very stern way - "Next time there is a crisis pencil it in!"

The call helped a LOT and we will follow up with the damage next week.

She did send me home with one of her blankies to keep me safe until the next session.