[Sanada]

In chat i think i've made enemies. I really do not know. I'm new to inter net, and i've, for years; "seen so many people get really,really upset because of internet"(chat or whatever). Its why i've avoided it for years. Books dont upset me as much as this has, a book is one way traffic, its different to read a good book. Thats what i've been saying for years. A book can make me cry, alot, but the internet can be and could be a wepon of mass destruction. I only have faith in P.C at the mo, but if i come across hostility on P.C's site it makes me wonder, alot about if the internet is for me. There is now though "no" turning back for me, i cannot live without it now, that would be like going back to staring at a wall. ..X..

[Sanada]

i come with an open heart, but i can turn tables if need be, upon those who are hostile on this site. Watch out the ones who abuse the innocent. sanada. x

[SoupDragon]

It sounds like you have experienced a tough time somewhere. I think this is a great site to stick with, not despite that, but because of that. Happy to listen if you want to say more.

[venusss]

PC has dynamics as real life.

And to be honest, I am not on the PC is greatest thing EVAH bandwagon. Yes, I have made some amazing friends here... but guess what I have also *amazing* enemies. I guess that is the VAT on not trying to comfort. Being myself brought me friends... but i realize not everybody is going to be my friend... so it's not even worth trying. Why waste time on people are not bad, but you don't click, talking things you don't care about, hiding your opinions for fear of upsetting them...

It takes time to come across people you will click with. Often times when I am in the chat room with people i already know, I talk to them and I am not in mood for meeting stragers. Rude? About as rude as going to pub and than sitting with a good friend while exchanging only short politness with others.

[Sanada]

Originally Posted by SoupDragon

It sounds like you have experienced a tough time somewhere. I think this is a great site to stick with, not despite that, but because of that. Happy to listen if you want to say more.

cheers soupdragon, i know, i know, i'm never leaving this site, it's the only one i trust.

[pegasus]

Look, if someone is being abusive or upsetting people in chat, you need to be letting the moderators know. Next time copy the conversation and send it to the admin team.

Psych Central is a good place to be.

[Sanada]

Originally Posted by VenusHalley

PC has dynamics as real life.

And to be honest, I am not on the PC is greatest thing EVAH bandwagon. Yes, I have made some amazing friends here... but guess what I have also *amazing* enemies. I guess that is the VAT on not trying to comfort. Being myself brought me friends... but i realize not everybody is going to be my friend... so it's not even worth trying. Why waste time on people are not bad, but you don't click, talking things you don't care about, hiding your opinions for fear of upsetting them...

It takes time to come across people you will click with. Often times when I am in the chat room with people i already know, I talk to them and I am not in mood for meeting stragers. Rude? About as rude as going to pub and than sitting with a good friend while exchanging only short politness with others.

cheers venus, that makes sense( i think). No i does make sense, but how on earth is one to make friends if one does not introduce themselfs as politely as poss. Weird stuff this life. Its hard work(never mind real work).xx

[venusss]

If the convo is interesting and have something to say, just chip in.


why are you asking a socially awkward person, though?

[Sanada]

Originally Posted by pegasus

Look, if someone is being abusive or upsetting people in chat, you need to be letting the moderators know. Next time copy the conversation and send it to the admin team.

Psych Central is a good place to be.

hi pegasus, its not that is abusive(yet), its an energy, a feeling that somethings not right. Being polite is the most important thing to me. If i'm not polite i'm as bad as anything i see as being bad, and totaly un-polite. I will not, and i totaly refuse to lower myself to a level of being just "dog gone rude". If though, i'm singled out as crazy, so be it, i'll be crazy, i turn tables. Its the only defence mech i have. Thanx Pegasus..x

[lynn P.]

(((Sanada))) - personally I don't use the chat feature - for some reason I'm not comfortable doing live chat anywhere online. I agree with everything that's been said including Pegasus advice of contacting the moderators and informing the chat coordinator. You should also learn how to 'save a chat log' so you can copy and send this to the chat coordinator and moderator. You also have the option of letting administration know. Most important thing is learn how to save those unpleasant chats.

[Sanada]

thanx, words of advice are always welcome, i have to do chat though, i'm learning all the time. A bridge was built today though and i'm glad for it. I can totaly undrstand though why people dont do chat, its fast, strange sometimes, and can be abit manic. Thats ok though by me, i'm here to help and be helped, to listen and to learn, sometimes chat can be rough, thats ok. But there are people who need emotional support, i mainly go to try to give help and recive help in chat, i wont give up easy, i need chat and chat needs me. .x.x.x.x.x.x S.x.x.x.x.x.x.

[salukigirl]

The only thing you have written in here that I'm really not comfortable with is the threatening. Some of what you wrote sounds like you are expecting us to be abusive and that's not really giving us a chance. And saying "watch out" just seems a little mean for something that hasn't even happened yet. I agree to contact the moderators if something does happen but don't jump to conclusions saying things like "it's not abusive (yet)" like it will automatically happen. Give people here a chance.

[Sanada]

Originally Posted by salukigirl

The only thing you have written in here that I'm really not comfortable with is the threatening. Some of what you wrote sounds like you are expecting us to be abusive and that's not really giving us a chance. And saying "watch out" just seems a little mean for something that hasn't even happened yet. I agree to contact the moderators if something does happen but don't jump to conclusions saying things like "it's not abusive (yet)" like it will automatically happen. Give people here a chance.

ok, no probs. Misuderstanding is my middle name, i get upset, i say/do silly things, i get lost in translation, thats why i'm here. I was tormented(not just bodly), but mentaly too. Sometimes i totaly take things too seriously, at school, uni/student days i was targeted, singled out just because of that, because they knew how to wind me up. I came to pysch central because i want to escape being singled out, for being different, being tormented because i was "easy meat". I'm the least hostile person i've ever known, i still am. I don't trust other sites, i've seen many friends go way down because of the internet. I don't do facebook, or any other forums or chat except p.c. If i did i would be cutting my own throat. I'm aware of internet dangers and pit falls, now i'm on the internet i have to be careful. I don't want to go down the roads some of my friends have gone, it was too upsetting to see that, be around that. When i lost my best friend(sui, not because of internet, other reasons), i changed, i became very protective of my friends, so to see what facebook could do was a shock to me. I can't stand myself being singled out, or any that i love. On this site, i'm begining to love again(i never stopped loving really), but i'm making new friends. But i'm new to this, i'm finding my feet. I don't want to be hurt, or see others be hurt. Its the way i am now. Protective. Pay no mind to silly "emotional" highly strung words, i could'nt hurt a fly if i tried. Thank you for your honesty, i need honesty to learn and move forward. Sorry. xxxsanadaxxx.

[sabby]

Hi Sanada,

I understand where you are coming from. You have only been here a very short while and just like in real life, it takes time to form relationships here. There are many members here who have trust issues for very good reasons. In that respect, many will have their guard up and it may take time to get to know them and them to get to know you. Please be patient with yourself and the membership in that regard and just be yourself

One of the great things about PC are the tools we have to make "our personal" experience the best it can be. Chat can be a difficult realm for some folks. Sometimes emotions run extremely high and it's so easy to just type out what one is thinking/feeling without having time to process those thoughts or feelings first. I think that can cause difficult times and feelings in the chat rooms. You do have a couple of options in chat to help yourself. Like others have said here, copy and paste the chat to a team member (mod/admin) with your thoughts on why anything that happened was against guidelines. The team will review the situation and act accordingly. The other option is to put a member in the chat room on ignore so you won't see what they are saying and you won't have to be upset by them. Just remember that if you change rooms and that member shows up in the room you have gone to, you will again have to put them on ignore. The ignore feature does not follow to different chat rooms.

One thing I have learned over many years of chatting online is that when someone is in a chat room and seems to be looking for an argument, the absolutely best thing to do is ignore that person. That goes for everyone in the chat room. For these folks are looking for any reaction they can receive (usually negative) and when you take that away from them, they have no one to engage and will stop or leave the chat room. I know it's hard not to engage with a difficult chatter, but it truly is the best thing one can do.

Then there are the forums which, considering how many posts/threads are created each day are extremely safe and supportive. One can also use the ignore function if they find a particular member that irks us for whatever reason. We can also "report" posts/threads that we feel are unsupportive/abusive/against guidelines. The team gets those reports (no members know who reports anything) and will act accordingly. The worst thing a member can do is to report a post for guideline issues and go back and respond to the member you just reported. That too could be considered against guidelines so you will want to be careful with that.

The bottom line is to create your own safe experience here. We all need to learn how to do that and what works best for each of us. I hope you find you have a good experience and I'm glad you are a member here!

Wishing you well

[Sanada]

thanx pegasus, your right, your absolutly right. I think i need to learn more, about internet chat. The reason i'm here is to get support in ways i could never imagine. Thank you. x

[Sanada]

Originally Posted by sabby

Hi Sanada,

I understand where you are coming from. You have only been here a very short while and just like in real life, it takes time to form relationships here. There are many members here who have trust issues for very good reasons. In that respect, many will have their guard up and it may take time to get to know them and them to get to know you. Please be patient with yourself and the membership in that regard and just be yourself

One of the great things about PC are the tools we have to make "our personal" experience the best it can be. Chat can be a difficult realm for some folks. Sometimes emotions run extremely high and it's so easy to just type out what one is thinking/feeling without having time to process those thoughts or feelings first. I think that can cause difficult times and feelings in the chat rooms. You do have a couple of options in chat to help yourself. Like others have said here, copy and paste the chat to a team member (mod/admin) with your thoughts on why anything that happened was against guidelines. The team will review the situation and act accordingly. The other option is to put a member in the chat room on ignore so you won't see what they are saying and you won't have to be upset by them. Just remember that if you change rooms and that member shows up in the room you have gone to, you will again have to put them on ignore. The ignore feature does not follow to different chat rooms.

One thing I have learned over many years of chatting online is that when someone is in a chat room and seems to be looking for an argument, the absolutely best thing to do is ignore that person. That goes for everyone in the chat room. For these folks are looking for any reaction they can receive (usually negative) and when you take that away from them, they have no one to engage and will stop or leave the chat room. I know it's hard not to engage with a difficult chatter, but it truly is the best thing one can do.

Then there are the forums which, considering how many posts/threads are created each day are extremely safe and supportive. One can also use the ignore function if they find a particular member that irks us for whatever reason. We can also "report" posts/threads that we feel are unsupportive/abusive/against guidelines. The team gets those reports (no members know who reports anything) and will act accordingly. The worst thing a member can do is to report a post for guideline issues and go back and respond to the member you just reported. That too could be considered against guidelines so you will want to be careful with that.

The bottom line is to create your own safe experience here. We all need to learn how to do that and what works best for each of us. I hope you find you have a good experience and I'm glad you are a member here!

Wishing you well

Wow Sabby, wise words of wisdom (you should write a book on -"how to chat on internet"), it would be a best seller. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I'm not giving up, i will learn how to live my life better, and if i recive replys like yours, i sould not fail. If ever you need to talk to me too, you know where to find me. I will not get highy strung in chat again(thing is i'm far to eaisaly upset), so maybe i will, who knows. The reply is very, very,very well recived. Lots of Loves, See You Soon Maccarron, Inawhile Croccodile, Cya l8r Allig8r......... love sanada.....xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[littlebitlost]

I'm your friend Sanada! <3

[Crew]

I'll be your friend to Sanada <3 Crew