Problem with husband wanting to drive...

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I am having a problem with my husband, Christopher wanting to drive the BIG trucks and I don't like the idea. He has been looking things up on it and he wants to drive, he thinks it will give us more money, but I have been told it will not. If he goes to certain places to learn to drive, he could be gone for three weeks or more at a time and I don't want that. I can barely handle the time he is away when he goes to work for average of 8 hours a night. I am very dependant on anyone, but him mostly, I get scared when I am by myself. I have tried to talk to him about this and he will not listen to me. If I tell him I am afraid of him finding someone else or losing one another, he just says we have to be strong. I do not want him to go, but he wants to. We have gotten in numerous arguments over this and I am not even sure now how to bring it up without arguing with him. Can someone please help me and give me some pointers on what to do? I want to thank you in advance for your replies...Thank you!

Sending Kitten hugs and Kitten kisses to you,
Brandi "meow" (((purr)))

<font color=purple>Cat Kisses
Sandpaper kisses on a cheek or a chin
That is the way for a day to begin!
Sandpaper kisses a cuddle and a purr
I have an alarm clock that is covered in fur.
Author Unknown </font color=purple>

Brandi,

I hope I can finish this before my lunch is over, if not, I'll write more after work. I drove long haul for 20 years. Truth be known, I made some of the best money I've ever made, BUT, I owned my own truck. Ask him if that's an investment he's willing to make. It's very expensive. I paid $230,000 for my truck. Almost $800 to replace a single tire, if you want a good one. The cost of of regular servicing is enough to gag you, and that's going by memory of what I paid many years ago. I can't imagine what it costs now. A reputable driving school will cost big bucks, and most won't guarantee that you will pass the driving test. The licence is very expensive too. Ahhh, but you get to see some beautiful country out on the road...which is great if you don't have a family. Most of my driving life I was divorced. My oldest daughter forgave me for all the things I missed with her growing up, I was lucky. Ask your hubby if he can handle 6 to 8 weeks away from you at a time, some companies insist on that, especially in the beginning.

And one last thing Brandi. Ask Christopher if he's ready for the beating his body will take. I've had four foot surgeries, two rotator cuff surgeries, a double discectomy, and a knee surgery, all due to the beatings I put my body thru driving truck. It wasn't worth it.

I hope he doesn't go thru with this. If there is anything I've said here to help change his mind, then I'm glad. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. But Brandi, hope he changes his mind for his own welfare. Make this about him, not you. That's the best way to show him that you care.

Much love to you,
Greg

Hi
Is the only reason you dont want him to drive the truck is because your afraid of losing him? You mentioned something about him finding another. you also mentioned that you are afraid to be alone. I briefly read your post and I hope I understand it correctly. It must be scary to think he will go ahead with this job? I know I would be if I were in your shoes. But, if it's something he really wants to do, maybe you could let him try it for awhile. I know a guy who is a trucker and he takes his wife with him. They enjoy the country together. Is this something that might interest the both of you? Assuming you dont have young children. I know the feeling of not wanting your spouse to do something. But If he really wants to pursue this maybe it's worth a shot. Talk to someone. Maybe a friend or therapist. Let us know what happens. I'll think you .

"you only have one chance to make a first impression"

ok, i have 3 uncles that have been driving trucks for over 10 years they love the money, but hate the beating theri bodes take.. Bptoo is correct on taht, one of them has had back sugery once and is due for another one some time next year.

The oother one just switched companies so he could be home on weekends so he could have a life outside of trucking, otherwise he would be on the road 4-6 weeks at at ime..

When you first start off driving a turck, you can be gone more than two months while driving with your trainer, it would be up to him/her and the compnay on how long you are going to be out.. And it would also depend on how well he did in school to depend on if you got to come hoem ofetn.. If they though you needed more traingn they will keep you out longer..

Brandi this is somthign the both of you avhe to work on.. I know you are scaref of being alone, but honey you will have to get over that fact, and understand he will have to wrok wihere he is happyiest.. He will not leave you in the marriage and you know that as well as I do.. Chirs is not a "divorce type" and neiter are you..
So get that thougth out of yoru head.. ok..
(looking over glasses at you )

on the other hand, has he went and really looked for work on the days he is off??? is he really trying to find a differnt job??? is he buying a sunday paper and looking fo rowk or looking on line at the sunday want ads..

He and you can only make your life better if you both try at this "new job" thing with each other, I do not mean, that you need to go with him..
I mean seriosly set down with eacho ther and talk about why he is miserbaly wat work, and what you both want out of a job. and why he wants to drive.. DO not get angry at him when she says he wants to do this type of job over a differnt type of job.. Supprot him.. he is your other half..
He is the one you married and you are the one he married .. "till death do you part, for sickness and health for better or worse" thye mean soemthing to both of you.. now rellly mean those words..
ok..
Enogh rambling ok..
Think about what I have said.. adn then talk with chirs.
i love you both dearly,, and want you both to be happy ok..

Gotta go, class is starign soon..
bye for now..
*dragon kisses*

<font color=purple>
The light is around me now
I see it so clearly now
I feel him in my heart
Lord God has set me free.
Let me rejoice in you
Let me be free
I love the lord God.
I have been Saved by your Grace and love today...04/11/04

I have a brother who is working for his 3rd company in probably 5 months. If your husband finds a good company, then that's a decision for you to make together. I have done many things to try to make ends meet, but it's a joint decision--recognize (by what it sounds) that your husband it trying to be responsible for his family finances, and in many places the economy is not the best; but I guess you have to weigh the cost vs. benefits.
Good Luck

((Brandi)) I hope you both are resolving this issue. It sounds like a hard one. I lived in Alaska for many years and a lot of women had husbands who worked on the slope for very long periods at a time. Some found it after they got used to it to be very liberating. I know you can't imagine it ever feeling like that, but you never know. Sometimes things happen in my life to force me to go beyond my safety zone, to help me progress.
My thoughts will be with you. Good luck! Annie