Visiting my long distance ex, things to keep in mind?

for so many reasons I would opt out of this visit. Personally I don't do friends with benefits anyway but even if I did, I would never do that with someone that ws hours away that required a long trip and a stay in a hotel. No sex, no matter how good is worth that.

Secondly, on top of that, if someone isn't comfortable with being seen with me, or that is ashamed or hiding the fact that I am hooking up with them, they don't deserve to share a bed with me for even a single night. Let alone have me spend money to fly, boat or train to them just to have said sex. I mean really, they are willing to get naked with you but don't have the backbone to have this fact public facing? As in letting people know you do this? This just screams that you're just a piece of meat to them all over the place. Sorry to be so blunt but it does.

I don't know if it is for you but is it worth hiding/lying/deceiving your family and/or loved ones just for this fling? Is it worth the amount of suspicion that may be raised because of this deception?

tldr; I'd stay home.

I would honestly evaluate what it is about this guy that made you willing up to now to do such things with him in particular. I haven't read all of your replies and posts but from what little I know he seems like a guy that values the female he has sex with, very little. I'm not saying it's your fault in any way but is there something about that type of situation that you might be drawn to it? I dunno about past relationships but I'd look at those too, were they similar or was this a non sequitor with relationships? Some things to think about because if there's something about it that drew you to such a situation, it might be a good thing to figure out why if not... just move on and look for guys that would treat you with respect whether or not it's a casual or full on relationship.

Aww. Thank you. I don´t want any other men, just want to play my role on earth and then die as soon as possible. Men are not nice. Although my imaginary friend is a man, he is very nice!
This guy was my first love, and i was his. Met him when i was 15 and in a pretty bad state, i was hurting myself in many ways. He saved me. We shared everything with each other. I guess i´m still stuck, wanting us to have that again. After our break up he said i was below him, that i´ll always be less than him and that he´s my leader. I just want my best friend back......

He broke up with you. That says it all. He only wants you for sex. You are not his best friend anymore, he has said horrible things to you, and yet you can't take the hint that he is using and abusing you. He has groomed you to take abuse from him and accept it. You have a form of Stockholm syndrome, in my opinion. This is why you need to see a therapist...so you learn to form healthy relationships.

Seesaw