[nushi]

I feel so suffocatingly lonely!

I'm a 32 year old woman, who never had a relationship with a man, except once; a man who abused me for a few months.

I tried to bear loneliness all these years, but I cannot bear it anymore. I don't even have friends to support me.

Where & how can I find a soulmate? Even more so, it's impossible for me to find one here in my society. People where I am are very traditional in their culture & religion, no man would ever accept to be with a woman who had a relationship before! And more, I'm a spiritual person who loves the world-view of cosmic evolution, & it's impossible for me to find a similar man in a traditional society.

I know this seems like a stupid post here, but I just can't take it anymore, it's hurting so much, & I'm not finding anyone to talk to about this... this is suffocating me...

Volunteering?
support groups?
like-minded social groups/outings?

Try 'meetup.com' No, it is not a dating or hook-up site. It is rather a clearing house of social groups. Search there to find something that interests you. My good friend belongs to one where the members simply meet once a month to do an activity. She has go-karted, skiied, zip-lined, hiked, and even gone to a trampoline club. She has met some great people and I think this is how she met the man in her life.

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm very lonely as well I don't know how to find a soulmate, but I'd remain confident that there are several men like you describe it... looking for them is the problem. :/

[ArchieAus]

Emotion isolation is a terrible thing . Not something I'm accustomed to , but something that's simple to remember no matter how long ago you experienced it . I thought justafriend306 added some excellent suggestions .
For myself I don't profess to understand Egyptian society , but I have read it can be a difficult place for a woman who doesn't conform to the cultural expectations of that area . I'm not sure if you have the means or opportunity to move to a more progressive area or even further afield , but a place where you could start afresh or have the opportunity to meet like minded people might possibly give you the opportunity to make friends , interact with others and build your confidence may bring you some relief .
I'm sure I'm making it sound far too simplistic . But I wanted to reply to at least keep your query relevant so others more knowledgable in this area would see it and reply .

[LadyShadow]

I remember this feeling SO much at one time in my life. As a matter of fact when I was your age, I was very much in the same place, starving for a soulmate and starving for that spiritual connection.

Put yourself out there as much as you can. Even if it is just online. Coming here to PsychCentral was the one of the best things you could have done. Join forums, chat sites, and do meetups if you can, and make connections anywhere you can get them to fill the loneliness.

For spiritual support, I usually visit here: Spiritual Forums - Spirituality, Metaphysical, Paranormal and Religious Discussion Forums

It's a great place to discuss all things spiritual and talk about interesting things.

Good luck!

[Entity06]

Hi! I am not from Egypt but I've visited Egypt 11 times already so I'm not a stranger to the country either. Are you in Cairo, Alexandria, elsewhere? For sure there are non-traditional, non-religious men there too, I've met some connected with the tourism industry(ok, granted, they're not close friends or anything but still), I would say in the educated, upper middle class, urban pockets of society but from what I've seen there's indeed not many of them percentage wise, which is a shame. I also know Egypt is very bad on women's right and freedom and abuse. So I definitely know that dating for someone like you must be incredibly hard.

I'm from Europe so it's ofc much better overall but I'm from Eastern Europe,from one of the most traditional, conservative countries in Europe so to an extent I can understand where you're coming from well enough as I am an atheist(which let's say isn't a big deal here) who is very liberal, progressive minded, gender queer and very masculine looking but still am attracted more to men than women. So men here never wanted anything to do with me and most of them are quite off putting to me with their subtle or downright overt sexist, traditional views on men and women. Of course, it's different than in Egypt but similar in the basic idea.

Could you perhaps somehow move to Europe and try to remain in Europe(or anywhere like that, Canada, Australia, New Zealand)? Your English seems quite good and there's something about a PHD in your signature.

Anyway, what I mostly wanted to say is u can talk to me if you want to.

[nushi]

Thank you so so so much for all your supporting replies, they're so precious to me

I will try all your suggestions. I'm very thankful indeed for the internet, because it provides a virtual world where one could try to find & connect with people who are similar in thinking. Sadly, as in real life, I can't find such people, because most people & men here are very traditional in their thinking, so it's a very very very rare chance that I can find a soulmate through connecting & meeting with people here in Egypt, & that makes me feel so miserable

I've already applied to PhD programs abroad. But still, what are the chances of me traveling outside AND staying there AND finding a soulmate there? A lot of people seek to immigrate to developed states, so immigration is not an easy thing, but the idea crosses my mind from time to time. But at many times, I feel discouraged to search for immigration opportunities because few people get that chance. But perhaps, I should consider this more seriously!

[Macd123]

Thing is it could happen when you least expect it - in the meantime stay busy.....🤗🌹

[nushi]

I'll try Macd... though loneliness is very painful

[Macd123]

Originally Posted by nushi

I'll try Macd... though loneliness is very painful

Most things are transient - I too have had long dark stretches. I am much older than you and I know it’s probably not much of a pep talk but you’re gonna find a way to keep mildly distracted and live your life (wow that was a long sentence)!! !!!.... There are so many things besides being in a relationship - I know not really comforting but true....😎😎😎

[Loose Screw x 2]

Loneliness is a painful thing and I understand how you feel. I hope things get better for you.

Originally Posted by nushi

Thank you so so so much for all your supporting replies, they're so precious to me

I will try all your suggestions. I'm very thankful indeed for the internet, because it provides a virtual world where one could try to find & connect with people who are similar in thinking. Sadly, as in real life, I can't find such people, because most people & men here are very traditional in their thinking, so it's a very very very rare chance that I can find a soulmate through connecting & meeting with people here in Egypt, & that makes me feel so miserable

I've already applied to PhD programs abroad. But still, what are the chances of me traveling outside AND staying there AND finding a soulmate there? A lot of people seek to immigrate to developed states, so immigration is not an easy thing, but the idea crosses my mind from time to time. But at many times, I feel discouraged to search for immigration opportunities because few people get that chance. But perhaps, I should consider this more seriously!

I say keep trying.

I have nothing to add but I hope that you will someday find your soulmate.

[Entity06]

Have you tried participating in Meetup type events organized by meetup groups(meetup dot com is the name of the site) or Facebook groups where there's expats who join in? I don't know, something hobbies based or just for socializing in English, for both locals and expats. There's some groups like that here and they're good for meeting new people.

I know it's not very easy to get to Europe and stay here, as a citizen from an African and/or arabic country, but I think you do have a good chance to get here via some university course of whichever type, Phd or another Masters or something. If you don't speak another language apart from English, you should still look all over Europe, there's English speaking Masters and Phd programs in other countries as well and you could also try learning German. Seriously, if you like foreign languages and would not mind trying to learn another, I suggest German because Germany and Austria are great to study in and Germany also offers the possibility of taking month long German classes in preparation for starting a Masters or Phd course.

[bpforever1]

To the op, my heart goes out to you!!

[continuosly blue]

You said you are lonely. You can be in a room with a thousand people and still feel alone. I think the answer to your “ problem “ lies within. Once I went through the pain your now feeling. I’m still “alone” even though I got the people in my life that I thought would cure the loneliness. Once you become, I’ll say , “ self integrated “ , for want of a better term , your “longing “ for someone to fill that void you feel in your heart will dissipate.
JMOHO.

[nushi]

Thank you guys for your support

Even though there are more to life than relationships, & my mother keeps telling me that, but I don't know, I still feel that I have enormous passion for intimacy & relationship. I don't know how other people may endure living their whole lives without love, but for me, I just can't.

I'm thinking I may go to a orphanage & spend time with children there, perhaps directing my affections toward children will be fulfilling. But I still desire to bear a child of my own, & I don't know how I'm going to get the chance for this!

I think I have reached self-integration by learning about cosmic evolution, & knowing my purpose in life. But still, the fact that it'd be a very tiny chance to find a man here who's "cosmic oriented", rather than traditional or religious, & who'd accept me with all my past & what I've gone through, is very tiny!

Still, I need to deal with my psychological problems as well, which exacerbate my loneliness & depression, & limit my capacity to deal wisely with my loneliness. But not being able to afford a psychotherapist is another huge problem!