Hi guys it’s been quite a while. During the past 7.5 months that the GM transferred to another store, I was like a ticking time bomb waiting to go off at any moment. I seriously felt like I couldn’t handle ANYTHING. I desperately tried to save my sanity by texting him (GM) 3 weeks ago, “how you been?” Luckily, he replied and said good how are you. I was relieved.

However, my habit of yelling at people over every little thing has already been firmly established during those 7 months. Three weeks time period is not long enough to get rid of it. I yelled at people today and INSISTED on going home early, so they ended up saying ok go home.

PLUS, people around me burst my bubble saying that the GM is just being polite and he don’t really like me like he likes everyone else. Cuz why would he like me if I always been obsessed over him?

One customer was rude yesterday and today. I used web able to handle things like that but now I can’t.

I’m constantly paranoid and always accusing coworkers of walking all over me during the 7.5 months since my GM transferred. He showed up 3 times to borrow stuff while I was there and seemed a tad cold all 3 of those times. Was he cold or was I sensitive? And he messaged me on Instagram asking why I been viewing his stories. Among other stuff he wrote that I don’t like. All those stuff made me crazy like hell. But idk how bad I really behaved if I only averaged once every few weeks yelling and cursing at people for several months. I lost my ability to handle ANYTHING.

Yesterday Customer drove off because he asked me to repeat myself 3 times and he still couldn’t hear me. So I insisted 5 times on clocking out before they said ok go. I wasn’t able to get an answer from my coworkers that I was DEMANDING why he drove off so I was also cursing at them. I yelled all morning at them for various little things too.

Btw, I checked my text record and just realized I texted that GM a week ago, not 3. Months of firmly established habits of yelling at people doesn’t just go away in a week.

[divine1966]

Yelling at people is a sure way to get fired. You know that. Former manager has nothing to do with inappropriate behaviors.

I suggested to you before that you start looking for jobs that don’t require customer interaction. Both retail and food service has job positions that don’t require costumer interaction. Stock room or back room or warehouse or kitchen or storage. Not customer service. Speak to your management that you cannot handle this stress and ask to be placed in the back. Do not bring former managers up as it is irrelevant

Originally Posted by divine1966

Yelling at people is a sure way to get fired. You know that. Former manager has nothing to do with inappropriate behaviors.

I suggested to you before that you start looking for jobs that don’t require customer interaction. Both retail and food service has job positions that don’t require costumer interaction. Stock room or back room or warehouse or kitchen or storage. Not customer service. Speak to your management that you cannot handle this stress and ask to be placed in the back. Do not bring former managers up as it is irrelevant

It’s mostly coworkers I get mad at. I always feel like they’re walking all over me so I just go off on them. It’s only after the fact that I realize they weren’t trying to. But I already yelled and cursed at them. Yes it’s bc the GM that transferred won’t talk to me during all 3 times he borrowed stuff from this store.

Idk if I’m sensitive or not, but the last time I saw him in person, I was eagerly approaching him to talk and he simply said “have a nice day” and kept walking. I hadn’t clocked off and was still wearing a headset. I was simply going up front from the back just to talk to him and met him half way. He hasn’t got the stuff yet that he was borrowing.

I hadn’t mentioned him once at work during the past few months but I yell at coworkers to release my anger. But it was just 6-8 times during the past 6 months, is it still all that bad?

Is it still considered walking out if a MANAGER finally said ok go home after I insisted 5 times on clocking out. I might’ve yelled and cursed while asking to clock out.

[divine1966]

Yelling and cursing even once is one too many

[Molinit]

Ruby, please find a job in another place - no more customer service. Your behavior is unacceptable. Your language toward coworkers is abusive. Ideally you should be on full disability and not working but if you have to work, it needs to be in a place that does not have customers and where you are not permitted to abuse your coworkers.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by ruby2011

Hi guys it’s been quite a while. During the past 7.5 months that the GM transferred to another store, I was like a ticking time bomb waiting to go off at any moment. I seriously felt like I couldn’t handle ANYTHING. I desperately tried to save my sanity by texting him (GM) 3 weeks ago, “how you been?” Luckily, he replied and said good how are you. I was relieved.

However, my habit of yelling at people over every little thing has already been firmly established during those 7 months. Three weeks time period is not long enough to get rid of it. I yelled at people today and INSISTED on going home early, so they ended up saying ok go home.

PLUS, people around me burst my bubble saying that the GM is just being polite and he don’t really like me like he likes everyone else. Cuz why would he like me if I always been obsessed over him?

One customer was rude yesterday and today. I used web able to handle things like that but now I can’t.

I'm glad you realize that you are doing something wrong. Your obsessiveness is driving people away and you need to take a step back and maintain professionalism at work. Insisting several times to leave work early is a quick way to be fired and you're lucky you haven't been terminated yet. I hope you learn quickly at how unprofessional your behavior is.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by ruby2011

I’m constantly paranoid and always accusing coworkers of walking all over me during the 7.5 months since my GM transferred. He showed up 3 times to borrow stuff while I was there and seemed a tad cold all 3 of those times. Was he cold or was I sensitive? And he messaged me on Instagram asking why I been viewing his stories. Among other stuff he wrote that I don’t like. All those stuff made me crazy like hell. But idk how bad I really behaved if I only averaged once every few weeks yelling and cursing at people for several months. I lost my ability to handle ANYTHING.

Yesterday Customer drove off because he asked me to repeat myself 3 times and he still couldn’t hear me. So I insisted 5 times on clocking out before they said ok go. I wasn’t able to get an answer from my coworkers that I was DEMANDING why he drove off so I was also cursing at them. I yelled all morning at them for various little things too.

Btw, I checked my text record and just realized I texted that GM a week ago, not 3. Months of firmly established habits of yelling at people doesn’t just go away in a week.

Accusing coworkers of things they never did is a sure way of getting them to turn against you which is the opposite of what you want. Also your previous GM is acting cold because you are invading his or her personal space. It's considered unprofessional and intrusive to pry into coworkers and managers personal lives without their permission. I'd suggest you stop contacting them before things get worse and you should look into a job that doesn't require working with others since you clearly can't handle it and can't seem to grasp the gravity of your actions and unwillingness to take responsibility.

I got wrote up at the end of my shift yesterday for me getting mad last Friday. Ever since that GM transferred 7.5 months ago, coworkers seemed to have taken the liberty to be rude to me. If they had a bad day, they’ll take it out on me and not anyone else. If I make a minor mistake doing my job, they say rude stuff to me.

That never happened before that GM transferred. Hell, it wasn’t until the first time he visited to borrow stuff and blew off my attempts to talk to him that other people became rude. I know I reacted badly to the GM not wanting to talk to me, especially when he blew me off during 3 separate visits. Given my ability to handle stuff like this, I really couldn’t have done any differently.

I know I said ruder stuff to my coworkers than any of them said to me, but I really don’t like it when they’re rude. A handful of people are rude to me now. Isn’t it enough to deal with just one rude person? Why am I dealing with a handful of them?

[littleblackdog]

Originally Posted by ruby2011

I know I said ruder stuff to my coworkers than any of them said to me, but I really don’t like it when they’re rude. A handful of people are rude to me now. Isn’t it enough to deal with just one rude person? Why am I dealing with a handful of them?

You don't like it when they are rude to you, but you don't seem to consider how they feel when you are far ruder to them.
The reason you are dealing with 'a handful' of rude people is that they are treating you the same way you are treating them. If this behaviour of yours has been going on for over half a year you can't blame them for getting sick of it and treating you the same way.

[Nammu]

As I recall their rudeness did not begin until you starting acting out and misbehaving and acted childish and entitled because your GM left. I suspect they are not going to fire you but basically ignore you until you quit. They will definitely not transfer you. This started with YOUR behavior and will only improve if you straightened out. Your ability to twist facts and blame others does you no favors. I’ll join the others who urge you to quit and find a more appropriate job not in the service sector.

[Molinit]

Ruby, I'll give you this piece of advice. One day, you'll say the wrong thing to someone, and you're going to get physical retaliation in return, which is far different than everyone you work with tolerating and avoiding your behavior.

[lizardlady]

Originally Posted by Molinit

Ruby, I'll give you this piece of advice. One day, you'll say the wrong thing to someone, and you're going to get physical retaliation in return, which is far different than everyone you work with tolerating and avoiding your behavior.

I've thought the same thing.

Today my current GM said I don’t seem to curse people out as much. I said the previous one seems to have come back around. I really literally don’t feel angry much anymore. But I’m still dealing with the consequences

[Bill3]

This was very nice to hear!

Originally Posted by Bill3

This was very nice to hear!

It is. I don’t usually yell at people unless something bad happened to me that made me HAVE TO take it out on others. Since my previous GM seems to have come back around, I no longer feel the need to treat others like crap.

It’s prolly very feasible that I could quit here and reapply at his store. Cuz the office made it extremely difficult to transfer crew. But I don’t because my folks strongly discourage me from taking this step.

I’m just glad I don’t have to get angry anymore where I’m at

[rechu]

No. You do not have to take things out on others. You make a choice to. Only you are responsible for your actions. And, your parents are right. That is not a good plan.

I think that beyond finding a job that is not customer-facing, as others have said, you need to work on not fixating on your supervisors wherever you end up working.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by ruby2011

I got wrote up at the end of my shift yesterday for me getting mad last Friday. Ever since that GM transferred 7.5 months ago, coworkers seemed to have taken the liberty to be rude to me. If they had a bad day, they’ll take it out on me and not anyone else. If I make a minor mistake doing my job, they say rude stuff to me.

That never happened before that GM transferred. Hell, it wasn’t until the first time he visited to borrow stuff and blew off my attempts to talk to him that other people became rude. I know I reacted badly to the GM not wanting to talk to me, especially when he blew me off during 3 separate visits. Given my ability to handle stuff like this, I really couldn’t have done any differently.

I know I said ruder stuff to my coworkers than any of them said to me, but I really don’t like it when they’re rude. A handful of people are rude to me now. Isn’t it enough to deal with just one rude person? Why am I dealing with a handful of them?

Please correct me if I'm wrong, but from what I'm understanding, you think it's okay to be rude to others but it's not okay for them to be rude to you? I'm sure you don't mean it to come off that way but it actually comes off as extremely arrogant and self centered. You need to understand the seriousness of your actions, they are unprofessional and inconsiderate, and as others have posted someone could get physical with you. I've seen people get physical with others for accidentally bumping them the wrong way which is absolutely ridiculous but it happens so you really need to watch your language before you say something to the wrong person.

[rdgrad15]

Originally Posted by ruby2011

It is. I don’t usually yell at people unless something bad happened to me that made me HAVE TO take it out on others. Since my previous GM seems to have come back around, I no longer feel the need to treat others like crap.

It’s prolly very feasible that I could quit here and reapply at his store. Cuz the office made it extremely difficult to transfer crew. But I don’t because my folks strongly discourage me from taking this step.

I’m just glad I don’t have to get angry anymore where I’m at

What is your over obesssion with supervisors? Do you realize how creepy that sounds? I understand you may have problems with social cues but literally everyone on here is saying the same thing and has been for a long time. That should be enough to make you realize that perhaps your entitled and stuck up behavior is driving people away and you wanting to apply to wherever your GM is just comes off as stalking.

[Molinit]

Ruby, when you were growing up, did you throw tantrums and make everyone's life difficult so you would get your way? Because it sure seems like it. You think if you make everyone else's life hell, they'll let you do what you want.

If you try to apply at the other store, you not only will not get a job there because you stalk people, but you also may end up having legal action taken against you. That GM actually should get a restraining order against you.

I’m pretty sure I texted him the Friday before Halloween and he replied. Then it went on another 2 lines of dialogue about the upcoming weekend. Aside from that, all we really do is view each other’s stories on Instagram. I mean just normal stuff, not over the top.

I’m saying I stopped feeling the need to get angry and scream at people once he seemed to have come back around. People still walk on eggshells around me currently but the past few days they’re not as rude anymore.

[sarahsweets]

Ruby I really feel you need a treatment program where you attend daily for awhile and work on your skills. I dont think you should be working.

Please tell me, based on all my posts on this forum, how scary is my level of obsession to all other people?

[divine1966]

Originally Posted by ruby2011

Please tell me, based on all my posts on this forum, how scary is my level of obsession to all other people?

It is highly inappropriate and unhealthy and potentially scary for other people.

It’s also somewhat scary that you refuse to acknowledge that you are wrong in your behavior.

Now I know a lot of your behaviors are common with some people diagnosed with ASD. In addition you mentioned other diagnosis. I get it that it’s not that simple:”just stop doing it”. Not that easy.

But you do need to try harder and monitor your own behaviors and seek help amd listen to others.. If you cannot, then you have to seek supported employment with a job coach supervising you on the job. Or you should not work at all. But you can’t go on in this manner

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by ruby2011

Please tell me, based on all my posts on this forum, how scary is my level of obsession to all other people?

For us it’s frustrating because you won’t stop insisting that it’s all other people s fault.

For the people you work with it’s probably both frustrating and scary because you insist on lashing out screaming and behaving like a person who is entitled and unstable

For your managers it’s outrageous and terrifying.