I'm so mad at myself for this

I don’t think you should give up what you like to do at all, but that’s just the price to pay: running into him and his friends at concerts and gatherings. Obviously it’s the same crowd because even when you go out of state you still run into his friends.

It doesn’t mean you need to give up on going places. If it doesn’t upset you then you should keep going but if it upsets and bothers you enough that you worry for days that he tracks your phone or that he got his friends to stalk you, then there’s a choice to make.

It’s not easy. Even in the most amicable divorces running into exes and ex’s friends isn’t fun. No one likes it. Most people would rather not if they can help it.

This is my social life at the moment. I’m certainly not going to stop going! Yes these things are bothersome but I’m not giving up my whole social life to become a total recluse and isolated from everyone just to avoid some uncomfortable encounters.

I heard from my ex husband the other day. He wrote a lengthy email. I happened to find it (he is filtered) because I was checking that folder for something else.

Naturally, he did not even congratulate me on getting a job and a raise. And of course, he only talked all about how HE feels and how the divorce is impacting HIM. There was nothing in there about how I feel or what I may be going through, except for "I really hope you are doing well." It was yet another sob story from him about being miserable without me and about how he can never love or be attracted to anyone else. I call BS. It's all just him hoovering me and trying to win me back over.

Wow. How do you feel about this? I am surprised there is still so much back/forth AFTER divorce.

Some people just don’t get it that there’s no need for all that. You cannot fault him for writing to you though as he replied to your email and you were even upset he didn’t reply. Now you are upset he didn’t congratulate you. Might be tempting to write back asking why is he not congratulating. It’s probably wise to stop communicating all together. One of you has to stop first. Don’t reply if you get more emails.

Now if you had kids, especially minors, you’d have to figure out modes and frequency of communication and remain civil with each other for years to come. But in your case it might be time to stop so you can both move on

Delete, block.

Yeah. I am not replying this time. NOT this time. What more is there to say anyways? I would only be repeating myself.

And, I was not upset that he didn't congratulate me. I was commenting on his self-centeredness.