[Sian_Tuner]

Im not sure if this is the right place for this. But I need help, badly. My name is Sian, and im 18 and my fiance just broke up with me. I want to die.. Please I need someone to talk to..

Hi Sian and welcome to the forum. Stick around and you'll find oh so many kind souls here that are always willing to listen and lend a helping hand. You are absolutely in the right place with this post. I myself have recently parted from a 3 year relationship that followed a three year very close friendship. Needless to say I completely understand. I'm not sure of the terms of your separation, but by your comments, I'm going to assume they were bad. Can you tell my why he left? Mine left me because of my problems. The depression that follows the ending of a close relationship is very common. And while it may not feel like it right now, time will heal your heart. Let us know what happened and I'll offer any advise I can. Till then be safe, be good.

ryan

[Sian_Tuner]

well. We've been together for about a year now. We've been friends for alot longer. Best friends. It evolved and we went though alot. Its a net relationship, but that shouldnt matter. Time passed and things happened, I am a chronic depressed person.. always have been and when we first me I was suicidal. She cared, she came on talked to me. Made me feel good inside.. She was a very good friend. Evenally I found myself falling in love. I remember the day we finally admited it clearly.. And then I look at now She left because she said she was unhappy. She didnt tell me why she was unhappy.. Just she had to worry too much about everything. I told her we'd work things out, that everything would be ok if she tried, but she didnt want to Told me it was just over.. I getting back into the way I was before our relationship. I just want to die it hurts so badly..

I'm not taking her side on this, but I can see from the other point of view how difficult it can be to be with someone that suffers from depression. At least that's what my ex told me. I felt the exact same way you do now when we first broke up. It's never easy when the heart is involved. Do you see a psychiatrist or a psychologist for medications or therapy? Also, when you said that she had to worry too much, do you think she was referring to you? In that she had to worry about your safety? Btw, if I'm asking to much, just tell me to shut up.

ryan

[Sian_Tuner]

Its ok.. feels good to talk.. I need to right now to keep from harming myself.. Umm.. I have seen a phycologist, I did for about a year. They really couldnt help me.. and I really dont want to take meds.. I think she was worrying about me. Not really me hurting myself. I was happy and the depression was gone, I was truely happy. I was trying my best to make her happy. But she was hard to talk to. I love her though, and I miss her.... I just want to work everything out why is she so against it....

I really can't say why she's so against it. I can say, however, that it isn't easy for a person with no mental illness to talk to someone who has one. Most of the time they don't understand. How come you are opposed to the meds? I was opposed to mine till they started to take effect. Now I love them.

Ryan

[Sian_Tuner]

I just want her to try is all.. Not to just.. give up like she is. I am opposed to them.. because :\ I feel they just make you feel better about things without actully fixing what the problem is..

Well Sian, that could be. I felt very good with my ex for a while... but then my stuff started to creep back in and create problems. I'm really not sure what to say at this point. I wanted my ex to keep trying. Begged her to stick it out for about a year and a half. But finally it was over. I'm not in your ex's head so I really can't say why she feels the way she does. All I can do is lend an ear. Could you give her a day or 2 and then ask her to talk? Maybe if you went in for therapy to try and get well she might come around. It's worth a try. Best wishes.

Ryan