Question about hallucinations

Hi, I have been diagnosed with BPD and one of the symptoms can be psychosis. What i was wondering is as far as hallucinating goes, if any of you can remember how you first started hallucinating. Was it just one day you flat out completely hallucinated, or you gradually got to that point. I ask this because recently ive felt like i was hallucinating but while i was sleeping, usually dreams are in the 3rd person but ill step into first person and beging hallucinating in my sleep. Thanks for any input you have to offer.

Also wanted to add that I would depersonalize or dissasociate, cant remember which is which, i would have out of body experiences in my sleep alot, id go from 1st to 3rd person, and start walking around my body and whoever was with me. I just want to know any early signs you can supply me, thanks again

bump

I guess i found what I needed, ill post it here incase anyone else has the same problem i did.

http://www.healthservices.gov.bc.ca/.../gp_primer.pdf

I couldn't get into that site, Jakromm, but how are you doing now?

I dont know, I seem to have all the symptoms of borderline personality, then i also seem to have the symptoms for prodomal stage of psychosis, the beginning of it. But I cant seem to think that I actually have either, that im just focusing on all of this to much and maybe exagerating symptoms in my mind, or that i have a need to label myself as either of these to explain things in the past. I just can't accept that I actually have borderline and im falling into psychosis, despite all the evidence. I also feel like if i do have it that ive somehow created it on purpose sub contiously. Maybe im being ridiculous either way, let me know what you guys think.

what does your pdoc or therapist say about this? what info have they given you abut your dx?

do you mean you are hallucinating while you are fully asleep? because that would be dreaming--not hallucinating. But if you mean that you start hallucinating (hearing voices/having visions/out of body experiences) as you are drifting off to sleep, or right when you wake up, im not exactly sure about this myself. I've heard that hearing voices and such while you are falling off to sleep or when you wake up is "normal", then again i've heard that it's not normal, so i don't know. This happens to me all the time. I'll start hearing voices, shouts and screems and such when im falling to sleep and i also have tons of visions when im going to sleep.

I started hallucinating when i was about 3 or 4. So it's hard for me to remember exactly how it started up. I think it started up pretty suddenly. I remember sitting there on the floor and suddenly i was hearing this strange, evil, loud voice shouting at me really fast and saying things that didn;t really make sense. I also use to have lots of visions and a feeling like the room was getting bigger or smaller.

These days, i have lots of minor visual hallucination: seeing shadows and bugs on the wall out the corners of my eyes, or bugs flying around the room. And i still hear the voices--though these days they aren't as loud, but they come more often, and mostly, i have lots of strange bodily hallucinations--feelings like other people are possessing//inhibiting my body, my body parts look deformed, cant tell where my body stops and the world starts, can't tell where my limbs are. And the other night i had another one of those episodes in which everything kept getting really small and then growing really huge.

hope this helps...good luck

-Becka

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I dont know, I seem to have all the symptoms of borderline personality, then i also seem to have the symptoms for prodomal stage of psychosis, the beginning of it. But I cant seem to think that I actually have either, that im just focusing on all of this to much and maybe exagerating symptoms in my mind, or that i have a need to label myself as either of these to explain things in the past. I just can't accept that I actually have borderline and im falling into psychosis, despite all the evidence. I also feel like if i do have it that ive somehow created it on purpose sub contiously. Maybe im being ridiculous either way, let me know what you guys think.

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i can relate to this. I know that i didn't exactly create my "psychosis" because it started when i was so young without me even thinking about it, but now that i'm older, i know i've deffinatly been feeding it, making it "worse" But it's my escape and i prefer it to living in "reality"

Before i was diagnosed with schiz, i was givin many other diagnoses's, because i didn't understand myself or what was going on so i never was able to explain things well enough or give the doctors enough info to be able to correctly diagnose me. Even after doing research and deciding that i probably am schizophrenic, and then after being diagnosed with schiz, i still had my doubts for a while. It's all really confusing. I had to do a ton of research on Schizophrenia and similar conditions for it to all make sense to me. Now it finally does and i am 100% sure that i am schiz. (however, i have my own deffinition for what schizophrenia really is)

there are lots of similarities between schizophrenia and borderline personality disorder, and other things like psychotic depression, bipolar disorder, schizoid personality disorder, schizotypal personality disorder, etc. It's really confusing and complicated, i know.

Im not a doctor or anything, but i've done a great deal of research. If you want, you can describe your symptoms for me and maybe i could help.

-Becka

I agree... have you discussed this with your doctor, your feelings about maybe being more or other than borderline?