Roll Call 14

I wanted to show off my art work. Here's a few

Self Portrait I did with conte crown. This was back when I pulled a Britney Spears and cut all my hair off.
http://fc04.deviantart.net/fs70/i/20...ey-d4iv8xk.jpg

This is a picture of me and my ex boyfriend.
http://fc09.deviantart.net/fs71/i/20...ey-d4ognes.png

This is Hamtaro me. I made this completely off of MS Paints.
http://fc04.deviantart.net/fs45/f/20...sicaFarley.png

Noodle from Gorillaz. Done completely off of MS Paints
http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs45/f/20...sicaFarley.png

Spongebob... Done on MS Paints.
http://fc08.deviantart.net/fs71/f/20...ey-d4bauxl.png

thats really good :: clapping ::

so costello would he be on no meds then? if he went off.

im really paranoid right now.

ive been really considering trying weed again but im worried.

Erti you are an amazing artist!

Erti they're amazing!!!

last time i smoked pot i went really paranoid and i got a huge amount of negative symptom long with my paranoia...and i usually don't get paranoia either.....i ended up in the hospital after that...

my advice if ur gonna do it....do it in a safe environment and just be careful...if u start experiencing symptoms just ease off the stuff....just keep an eye out newts....u don't want things to get worse than they already are....mind u some people are different when it comes down to their experience with weed....

I'm not sure. The pdoc gave my son the numbers from that article. If he goes off the medication he's twice as likely to relapse, but if he doesn't relapse in the first 6 to 10 months, he'll have a much lower relapse rate for the rest of his life. It almost sounds like he wants to take him off altogether. I guess we'll wait until next month and see what he says.

Erti: Really nice pictures. I wish I could do that.

Newtus: I'm sorry you're feeling paranoid. I doubt pot will help.

Thanks guys. I use to be in art school before I had my meltdown. Thinking about drawing more but no motivation to do so.

im so proud of your son and how far hes come

thats so good erti i wish i was as good as you

thank you

i just want off these meds. i miss experiencing the creative deep experience of my schizophrenia. it was so deep. like i could tap into all this stuff that i KNEW no one else could. i could do art and all this stuff.

they say i cant function off meds but theres a part of me that can function like no else could off meds.

im just hoping pot can bring some of that back

It's exciting but scary. According to the article he has a 25 to 55% chance of relapse. I still think it's worth taking the risk.

how long has he been on meds? or on THAT med? because im wanting to come off mine and be healthy too and my doc just upped my dose to 100mg haldol injection and they said they see no reason to lower it or change it right now

I think it's been three years.

damn...........
this sucks for me im sure.

i need like a game plan or something.

i dont want to be on meds for three years til it gets lowered and my doctor talks as if its gonna be like that...

man this sucks big time

cause hes like "in 3-6 months maybe ill lower it" and it was upped because i went to the hospital. man this sucks a_ss

first of all i need to stay out of the hospital. if i never went then it wouldnt have been upped because me going was their reason for upping it!!!

im so like torn by this medicine its making me crazy

the doc and nurse are so full of it!!! f_ckers!

i just dont know how to prove to them that i dont need THAT much medicine.

they said "well when you went to the hospital in december werent you hearing voices" i said "NO i was suicidal".

sometimes when i goto the hospital its cause im suicidal. not ALWAYS because im psychotic.

i swear to you will all my heart
if i just had FRIENDS and a more loving FAMILY and not so many FINANCIAL PROBLEMS i prob wouldnt be as psychotic as i am. im f_cking stressed out and thats what makes me psychotic half the time.

i dont even have any friends to provide me support. how the HELL do they think ill do well with medicine when i have no effing support system.

Newtus you have friends here on Roll Call! I for one care about you and wish the very best for you

i very well understand my online friends but what i meant was in real life where i can hug someone and look at them and stuff.

i didnt mean to leave you guys out. you guys are the only support system going that i have

I totally understand Newtus! I wish I had real life friends too. I am thankful for online friend support too but would like to have it in real life. The one friend I thought I had in real life showed her true colors recently and now I know I cannot trust her and that I need to back up from her. It hurts my heart because I thought she cared but in reality she really didn't.

im so sorry cracking.