Roll Call 19

I love coffee but I can't drink it any more. When I used to hang with my so-called friends many years ago I was a coffee addict. I'm not kidding. It was not rare for me to drink 17 cups in a day. Then I started waking up twitching and not feeling rested. The backs of my teeth felt like they were growing chalk on them. I was always jittery and sick to my stomach. So, I forced myself to quit caffine from 22 until I was 25 years old, except for iced tea on rare occasions. Now when I have coffee if I drink more than 1 small cup I get really sick. I don't think it was the caffine, though, because I drink coke and tea just fine. I think there is something in the coffee that my body reacts to.

Caffeine perks me up, but it doesn't keep me from sleeping at night. Must be the meds.

The only reason I sleep at night is because of meds. I've never been able to just go to sleep. I've had issues with insomnia since I was a small child.

ive had issues with insomnia since i was a little kid too. not even meds can make me sleep. my sleep is always broken and i wake up every hour. i need tons of meds to sleep and it STILL doesnt put me to sleep.

Anyone else have weird dreams because of the meds? Mine are never normal.

my dreams are always apocalyptic without meds. or me stabbing someone or someone killing me. with meds its actually almost the same.

I don't know if it's because of the meds, but my dreams are pretty whacked out.

I'm always being chased by something scary, but I don't know what it is. Sometimes I think it's the devil because I'm absolutely terrified in the dream. Grew up Catholic. That didn't help.

Any time I have coffee I put 6-7 tea spoons of instant coffee in a cup. About 500mg of caffeine. Most I had in a day was 1600mg

Edit: I think I hear my cats drinking out of the toilet.. Omg they are.. But I don't want to look.

Do you take cream or sugar? That's a whopper cup of coffee!

I grew up Catholic too, it definitely didn't do anything good for me psychosis wise.

Edit: was actually 1600mg but I don't drink it all in one cup lol that would taste nasty o.o

for awhile i thought about converting to catholicism. i think part of that thinking is my psychosis talking

this made me laugh LOLOLOLOL

I also have bizarre and vivid dreams. However while I was on a certain medication (can't remember which) the dreams got even more bizarre.

Not in one cup that would be nasty o.o and I put milk and sugar

Dunno why my posts aren't posting

Teeeeeest,..

I wouldn't recommend Catholicism to anyone. It had its day and left plenty of damage in its wake.

In fact, I'm trying to think of something that's done more damage than the Catholic Church and I'm drawing a blank.

Your posts are posting okay. Probably your connection slowing it down.

in a way your right. well in HUGE way. but i think its my psychosis talking when i say i wanna convert.

Hinduism would be even worse for psychosis. "A god for this, a god for that, etc..".

i need some way to make more friends. i kinda want more friends. anyone have any ideas? i have none right now. except here.

Lol, I grew up in a non-religious house. Though my family still believes in Jesus and an afterlife/ghost/reincarnation... I just never been to church before. Maybe once before. As for me I stay away from religion simply because I fear the repercussions it may have on my psychosis. I already see/hear spirits.

Right, I gotcha.

As someone who grew up with it I can tell you that you never entirely escape it. It wreaked havoc with my head. My voice(s) constantly told me I was going to hell and I would see and smell smoke.

i see/hear spirits and demons too. i grew up with a father whos heavily baptist. so i get what you guys are saying. my mother wasnt really religious.

Maybe you can volunteer at an oldfolks home or something like that? What about going to church? YMCA? hmm... can't think of much though.