Roll Call 25

When I'm drunk I feel like going back to work. I bought my own apartment I like being alone for now. idk

Zehr, I consider myself an ambivert - qualities of both introvert and extrovert.

Today I'm going to get my hair cut. I sold my electric keyboard because I need money, but I'm going to miss writing songs on it.

Newtus I never knew that you are just starting the celexa. I was watching the video that SometimesPsychotic posted about children being medicated and I always see stuff like "My kid has been taking Prozac (Or what ever) for 6 days before she hung herself" on BigPharma documentaries etc so be careful. I know someone that is starting the med that you're taking and she tried to break one of her ribs yesterday.

It was like my mom was on crack cocaine when she took Zoloft for anxiety.

im not just starting it. ive been on it for 5 months. i went off it after 3 months because it wasnt working. now im back on it

Susanna: [narrating] Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you have the cash? Have you ever been blue? Or thought your train moving while sitting still? Maybe I was just crazy. Maybe it was the 60s. Or maybe I was just a girl... interrupted.

I'm supposedly symptom free on this medication but I'm not ok. I can't be ok while I'm on something I want to be meds free. I don't need them. It's a constant battle in my head

How long have you been on them....you really need to be symptom free for 6 months before you can try tapering off...

I've been on them 7 weeks. I don't believe that I need them and I'm worried they're damaging me. I don't want to end up with TD no matter how many times my cpn says I won't get it. I hate medication I just want to be free. I hope I don't sound childish

I want to be able to control my own mind without needing chemicals

me too!!!!!!

Well it definitely sucks but the problem is if you go off too soon you might relapse and for some people there is a loss of function with every break as well as a reduced response to the medicine...so is it worth the chance that you might never be able to read a book easily again or that you might always have some psychotic elements or that you'll need a higher dose of meds in the future or make it so you always need meds? Even if you do want to go off because you don't think you need them a safe taper from an AP takes about 6 months itself and you can't do it yourself while on an injection...you need to discuss this with your pdoc...
Importantly even perfectly normal people can develop psychosis from too fast a withdrawal from APs....

That proves APs are a poison

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They reduce dopamine signaling so your body changes the receptor levels up to compensate if you go off then you get a ton of signal on all those new receptors. It's pretty much equivalent to snorting coke...the withdrawal process not the drug itself....

im bored

i take that back im gonna play xbox360

...theres somethig i never told you guys for the 4 years ive been on here...

Care to share newtus?

Risperidone in particular is zombie inducing poison.. But a good med sigh

xbox360 i think destroyed my life because I was so addicted from 11-13 o.0

i have a friend. i think hes an imaginary friend. he talks to me and tells me to do things. his name is jesse.

he had a strong presence in my life when i was 18 thru 20 and then he left but hes been back for awhile

I had/have an imaginary friend, but he's a little boy. His name is Henry and I saw him for the first time my first year of university. He said he was there to protect me. I miss him when he's gone but my doc says he's a hallucination so I guess I'm not supposed to see him. I don't care if he's just a figment of my imagination, he gives me comfort. I haven't seen him for a few years.

I love girl interrupted, I think I'd be like Lisa too Atypical...

I have to wait for wednesday for my pdoc appointment.then I can get my meds increased.I am feeling so fogged up right now life is like a foggy window I can see some things outside but I cant make out the full picture right now I dont know if its the meds making me feel this way but I am also feeling very depressed I still keep having visions of setting myself on fire or jabbing out one of my eyes cutting off my fingertips or my tongue carving the skin off my face.I cant get these horrible thoughts out of my mind but I dont think I will ever act on them.