Roll Call 61

Drinking milk or eating something starchy helps me a lot too. You should ask your doctor for zofran. It's the best anti nausea medicine. It helps me a lot. I'm prescribed 8mg 2/day. They've helped so much.

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Maybe explain to him that what he does makes you nervous and if he really likes you, he would stop doing that.

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I'm having awful anxiety right now. I got my sleep all messed up and I think my friend is coming over tomorrow to bring some stuff. We'll be starting on the clean up soon too. I'm very afraid.

I'm sorry. why are you afraid?

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ive taking zofran before. i dont rememeber what it did. thanks A18!

as for that guy idk what to tell him

Thanks, I'm not sure. Part of it is because I got my sleep messed up, my body is also not functional, and I have to be awake when my friend visits. I have to be on the ball and I just feel like I'm falling apart.

Great pics chickenfoot!

I used to have anxiety when I started doing it but I think the key is to not judge or try and block away any feelings you're currently having. Just acknowledge them and let them go by focusing on something else, your breath or your heartbeat, even on things like the temperature in the room, the feeling of the chair or bed against your body. It's all about staying in the present moment, so try not to think about the past or the future just the present. Focusing on things like your breath keep you present. Maybe the guided ones on youtube aren't for you, but do try again even when you're not anxious.

Thanks guys!

I deal with severe, episodic nausea (probably not related to anxiety, but still...). When I was on zyprexa it went away for years. It turns out that zyprexa has anti-nausea properties (probably wants to ensure that you keep down the extra 60,000 calories you'll eat a day on it).

Right now I take omeprazole (prilosec) for acid reflux, and somehow (I don't think this is it's intended effect) it keeps the nausea under control. Not sure how, but every time I skip a few doses, the nausea comes back. So you could ask your MD for that. You can even get prilosec over the counter, but it comes in low doses. I'm on 40 mg, which is prescription strength.

i had a hard morning. the voices in my head were really awful and as i was driving to group i thought the radio was sending me messages thru the songs they were playing. i got there early and i couldnt sit still. i took a prn beofre i left my house but it didnt help at all. i felt trapped with those stupid voices on the way to see T because i had to drive there. i felt like if i could get out of my car and get into the building it would go away. but it didnt and i felt even worse there because i knew i had to pretend to be normal which is so hard when all u wanna do is scream and run out the door. i told T before group that i was having problems. he said try another prn but i didnt. i kept thinking that maybe it was just bc the group and once it starts ill feel better. but of course i didnt i couldnt pay attention to anything they were saying and i felt like a freak and i felt like they all knew i was crazy and they were staring at me. i had left my keys on the table in the middle of the room and i have a pill container on it with my prns in it. T picked it up and silently handed it to me so i took 1. about near the end of the group i felt calmer and more organized and i was listening to what they were saying. so i felt better.

then i met with T afterwards and i was talking about how the psychosis seemed fun at first, like i was understanding things noone understood and i was figuring out all of lifes questions and that felt amazing. T told me he felt the same way. i asked him if he has been psychotic. i knew he has bipolar. he said he has been in a semi delusional state from mania. i would have never known!!! i am glad he told me that because now i know he can kinda understand what i am talking about. he said he is healthier and happier and has peace now. that gives me hope that i can recover and find peace like he has.

i didnt get lots of sleep last night so i think im gonna take a nap. i think that may be why things were so bad this morning. i have to finish my homework today.

hey all

i feel good today im just really bored this weekend. i have a feeling school wont change that. i was feeling so bad yesterday.

they invited me to a new group at my clinic. an all womens group. but thats so many group. that would be 2 groups a week plus therapy. and i dont want that. i dont even want to goto the group i already am going to.

i was talking to my sister and was telling her this and was all like "yea i got a life outside group thats too many groups" and shes like "what life? you call mom 5 times a day."
so that made me feel bad. now i dont feel like i have a life.

I had an ex treat me like that. Furthermore, if others are hinting at that then you can start to see a pattern of people's perspective. Maybe it's time you step out of your comfort zone and grip whatever passion you'd authentically be able to commit too.

Some people don't have the ability to maintain a grip but once one starts it builds momentum and little by little you flourish more each day. Even if you don't do it everyday you can always think about it.

There is this book called Man's Search For Meaning by Victor Frankl which dives into the power and strength one has when on gallantly finds meaning and what one will endure in order to aim towards it. This going from a jewish man who survived the holocaust where he went to the worst of concentration camps.

I haven't read it, but a decade ago there was a very popular book called purpose driven life. I'm not Christian, although my philosophy is laced with it. I haven't read this book it might be worth going to the library and see if it helps.

Personally, I like a narrative along with heavy meanings rooted inside the work. An old German and a disciple of Kant wrote "The way towards a blessed life. His conclusion is overcoming society and the age of perfected sinfulness to rise about the welter of culture and separate from your mere materiality in order to have a eternal life by having the sheer pleasure of the gift of giving. That's transcendental, that's aiming upward. It may not be what we do but what we ought to do under fair conditions.

When reading it I paused and thought about, "Isn't this what a god would do?" The gift of life and pleasure of seeing people's freedom flourish, which must be reconquered each day.

What a world it would be if we all shared that sentiment...

@newtus
You can have a life and still call mom 5 times a day.
Being close to your mom doesn't mean You don't have a life.

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I'm feeling so crappy today. My cold is getting slowly better but slowly is the key word there. I hate it so much.
Oddly enough, I haven't been hearing many voices since I've gotten sick. Huh.
But I still want to go through with the plan I've been given. Feels like I'll never feel better ever again and it sucks feeling this miserable.

i dont even call my mom 5 times a day more like 1-2 if people want to get technical. but hey whatever. that did hurt my feelings. im pretty sensitive.

its nothing yall did. its just what my sister said. it was hurtful. i dont think she was trying to hurt me. but it did.

whats everyone up to tonight?

anyone else feel lethargic or like otherwise really overall tired? and sleep too? i find myself taking naps in the middle of the day now.

I've been taking more naps lately but it interferes with my sleep at night. I feel very restless. I can't calm down because of the noise.

thanks for replying.

my naps have been interfering with my sleep at night very little. it could be because all my meds idk. i feel very restless too. in the daytime. i move from room to room and shuffle in bed. i lazy around all day.

Yes and my Akathisia is hard to take too. I feel like jumping out of myself to get some relief.

sorry for spamming the boards.

theres a lot going through my head.

i was just thinking. at what cost am i getting all this schooling? what if i get kicked off of disability if they see me goig to school or getting this money from financial aid? at what cost am i going to school? am i looking forward to pursuing a career? or getting a job?

my mom pushes me to get a job. yet my dad was the one who set up ssdi under his name and is pretty settled down under the fact that i have a nice income coming in.

That would hurt me too.

From times you've talked about her, I'll bet she'd be receptive if you let her know. Maybe send her an email telling her that it hurt - and "I do have a life. Different from yours, but I do have a life."

I don't think schooling can cause you to be kicked off disability. My understanding is that they would certainly like you to become independent. They have a program (that my daughter is on), that gives you incentives to work toward that. And if you start working, you can keep disability on a special program they have that changes the amount you get based on your income. And if you ever do 'phase out' of disability, you can get put right back on if something happens and you lose your job. You might want to talk to someone who knows for sure about that stuff, but that's my understanding of how it works in Texas. My daughter has worked part-time for the last 1.5 years and still has disability.

i work part time on disability