Roll Call 73

Feb 20, 2016, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by junkDNA

i told the group today about how

Possible trigger:

my former T was having sex with me one time and i was crying and i apologized to him for crying and he said it was ok bc he always wanted to **** a girl while she is crying

but then i immediately regretted it cause everyone was like omg and stuff and i wanted to leave the room.

after group T and i played cards and i took a ptsd test thingy. i told him i had a bad dream last night and he asked what it was but i felt too embarrassed to tell him because

Possible trigger:

it was about my sister masturbating in front of me

which is really weird and uncomfortable and gross and i dont know why im dreaming about these things. he asked me if ive been having flashbacks and i said sometimes but not that many and sometimes it happens when im driving and im not even in the present moment looking at the road because im seeing things thru my mind's eye and not paying attention to the road, so that is dangerous. i told T about how desperate the thoughts make me feel and that i am worried my voices will come back. he said thank god for ur PRNs.

bluh

Your former T sounds like a piece of ****. I'm sorry you had to go through all that it must be hard to talk about.

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ofthevalley · Feb 20, 2016, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by junkDNA

i told the group today about how

Possible trigger:

my former T was having sex with me one time and i was crying and i apologized to him for crying and he said it was ok bc he always wanted to **** a girl while she is crying

but then i immediately regretted it cause everyone was like omg and stuff and i wanted to leave the room.

after group T and i played cards and i took a ptsd test thingy. i told him i had a bad dream last night and he asked what it was but i felt too embarrassed to tell him because

Possible trigger:

it was about my sister masturbating in front of me

which is really weird and uncomfortable and gross and i dont know why im dreaming about these things. he asked me if ive been having flashbacks and i said sometimes but not that many and sometimes it happens when im driving and im not even in the present moment looking at the road because im seeing things thru my mind's eye and not paying attention to the road, so that is dangerous. i told T about how desperate the thoughts make me feel and that i am worried my voices will come back. he said thank god for ur PRNs.

bluh

sounds like a rough day. You should be proud of yourself for opening up.

ofthevalley · Feb 20, 2016, 09:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unsure123

I'm finding giving up smoking soooooo hard

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It's a real *****. I "quit" June 19th but I still smoke in the morning and before bed. The rest of the day I vape. Good luck!!!

Feb 20, 2016, 09:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ofthevalley

It's a real *****. I "quit" June 19th but I still smoke in the morning and before bed. The rest of the day I vape. Good luck!!!

Thank you. Yeah not smoking in the morning is hard lol I'm used to having a cup of tea and a cigarette when I wake up

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ofthevalley · Feb 20, 2016, 09:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unsure123

Thank you. Yeah not smoking in the morning is hard lol I'm used to having a cup of tea and a cigarette when I wake up

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Yup. It's tough. I smoke when I get the kids off to school. It's like that 5 minutes makes my day lol

newtus · Feb 20, 2016, 09:48 PM

i quit cigs december 2014 and havent had one since but i still vape.

ofthevalley · Feb 20, 2016, 09:52 PM

Congrats

falcon09 · Feb 20, 2016, 09:56 PM

I can't seem to kick the habit totally.

Sometimes I'll go weeks without a cigarette but then I'll crack and smoke one when stressed.

Feb 20, 2016, 09:59 PM

I have a few cigs a month that's about it. When I'm feeling good, I light one up and it gives me a bit of euphoria because of low tolerance. I vape when I'm chatting on cameras with internet friends. Nicotine spray for when I'm feeling agitated.

Tweaky says it would be efficient to put stimulants in my vape for a quick focus and clarity.

ofthevalley · Feb 20, 2016, 10:01 PM

It's so hard. I wish I had never started. I've been smoking regularly since I was 14 though I first started at 11.

Feb 20, 2016, 10:04 PM

I wasn't peer pressured at 9. I just flat out asked for one. But that's me.. 2 years ago I started cuz I was suicidal and agitated to hell.

Feb 20, 2016, 10:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ofthevalley

It's so hard. I wish I had never started. I've been smoking regularly since I was 14 though I first started at 11.

Ha that sounds like me I started at 11 aswell but I also smoked my first bong at 11. Looking back that probably messed up my brain a lot. I was way too young to do that

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ofthevalley · Feb 20, 2016, 10:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unsure123

Ha that sounds like me I started at 11 aswell but I also smoked my first bong at 11. Looking back that probably messed up my brain a lot. I was way too young to do that

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I didn't start that until I was 14

Feb 20, 2016, 10:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hyperagitate

I wasn't peer pressured at 9. I just flat out asked for one. But that's me.. 2 years ago I started cuz I was suicidal and agitated to hell.

I was peer pressured by my older sister and her boyfriend at the time. He used to buy me vodka aswell. When I was 11...

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ofthevalley · Feb 20, 2016, 10:10 PM

I just took one from my mom and that was it...I was hooked

Feb 20, 2016, 10:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ofthevalley

I just took one from my mom and that was it...I was hooked

Bad!

*Slaps wrist*

Feb 20, 2016, 10:14 PM

My mom still won't let me drink any alcohol because my psychologist said its not a good idea and now she's going to talk to him again because I don't understand. I always got drunk on meds before all I want is 1 drink on special occasions.

daisymazed · Feb 20, 2016, 10:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hyperagitate

Sooo tiiiired...

I didn't buy an energy drink cuz it has 50g of sugar in each drink but I neeeeed..

Osiyo, hyper, open a tin of beans,warm them, pour over buttered sour dough toast and watch your energy soar. Get the clark veggie brand. Nice glass milk, ahhhh, nothing like it. (Bon appetite')

daisymazed · Feb 20, 2016, 10:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ofthevalley

Xiamen. My fil is heading back to the big city hospital. He's bleeding "profusely" from where they removed his pacemaker and they can't get it to stop at the rehab hospital

. Poor guy needs a break.

daisymazed · Feb 20, 2016, 10:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

im going through so much right now. ive practically documented it. maybe if everyone can send me good thoughts/prayers my way.

Sending up prayers, Newtus!

daisymazed · Feb 20, 2016, 10:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unsure123

I'm finding giving up smoking soooooo hard

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Hi there 123,
I tried for yrs.,to quit, then went cold turkey.
Never looked back. All a matter of making up your mind.
I did not miss that tired dragged out feeling.
I believe you can actually do it! Do you?

Feb 20, 2016, 10:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by daisymazed

Hi there 123,
I tried for yrs.,to quit, then went cold turkey.
Never looked back. All a matter of making up your mind.
I did not miss that tired dragged out feeling.
I believe you can actually do it! Do you?

Yeah I've done it before cold turkey so I'm sure I can do it again. The one thing I noticed when I gave up before was food tasting a lot better.

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Erti · Feb 21, 2016, 03:34 AM

Hmm, how to mend this broken heart.

Door2015 · Feb 21, 2016, 03:43 AM

Hi erti, nice to see you,j

Erti · Feb 21, 2016, 03:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Door2015

Hi erti, nice to see you,j

Nice to see you too. Its been forever!

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