Roll Call 91!

That's only a small setback remember you ate lots of junk when the fridge wasn't working so that could be a small cause and you retain water during weight lose so remember if you weigh at night you might be 8lbs smaller then weighing in the morning!

I hate this week everyday this week it's like I have an appointment I'm so mad at myself for not being home when my package came and then having to wait after I come back to go back out from having to pick it up at the local post office because it needs a signature

Feeling pretty crap today and yesterday. Weird and off. Everything is dark and wrong. Hoping it's just a blip but I'm sort of getting dragged into it. Keep thinking about not taking my meds. This is how I get sucked in

@ Blue_Bird, how was the OA meeting, did you have it yet?

@ ofthevalley, does your state not have medical marijuana? Someone here in the nursing home gets that in pill form. He says it's not very powerful but he does get the munchies.

The machine is out of Monster Energy drink. There's nothing to make me awake anytime here. There's crappy coffee for breakfast, lunch and dinner with 1 to 2 cups at 10am in the dining room. Tomorrow that's what I should do.

Earlier I was in the bathroom and one of the girls next door started to walk in on me. I said "hello! I'm in here!" And she started laughing hysterically. I didn't see the humor in it. I'm very depressed today. There were two women here earlier from another assisted living place. I could vape there (hopefully indoors!). But my friend would not be able to visit me there because the trains don't go there. I have a list of questions I didn't ask. Too fogged up with morning drowsiness.

How big are the bottles? I've been wondering if I should try that too. At home I couldn't really because I never know if a package came, the mail carrier hates me.

Why do you think about going off your meds? Do they make you feel drowsy, or other side effects? You know what's happening so you can stop the blip if you choose to, or maybe I'm oversimplifying.

Im guessing that they are 15ml bottles. Either 15ml or 30ml

I think these two teenage girls were making fun of me in the store today so i took a picture of them and then a video when they walked out

Oh, that's great! That's about what I vape in a month here. I'll bet there's 15ml for each bottle. Otherwise they'd be a lot more expensive. Maybe I'll order but the nursing home is trying to get me in another residential home and I don't know when I'll be at a different address.

That's the kind of thing I'd do but you never know what people will do in revenge.

Glad I'm leaving the hospital on Monday. They want me to go back to the rehab program but I don't want to go I'll just get an addictions counselor when I get back out.

Hopefully my outpatient psychiatrist will put me back on Concerta like he did last time..

Bloody Concerta.. I'm always talking about it lmao..

I don't have to listen to this psychiatrist she doesn't care..

I dare them to try me. Teenage girls? Pfft. As soon as i started filming they stopped laughing.

Hey guys. Had a good day just hung around with the kids.
Now I'm watching tv waiting for my husband to get out of the shower. Hopefully we will go to bed early. I'm sleepy.
Hope you all have a good night.

So far I have worked 33 hours this week... Didn't this country already fight for a 40 hour a week work schedule? Has my boss not heard of this, or over time pay, or health insurance, paid days off?

I could move in with a friend that is being sober be chief of security for the first nations people learn how to shoot gun, woman that is using my phone all the time wants to give me 1500 I might as well go along with this crazy stuff it's better than sitting in the basement all the time..

Drank lots of coffee this morning.

Feeling hyper hyper hyper still

Tweak tweak tweak =]

I have three cans of pop left I usually drink two cans to stay awake these days

I went to the appointment today and well the doctor examined me and well he said I have healed up just fine now I need to do physio and I explained to him that I just started that!

Some a-hole is yelling out the window it's ridiculous so I thought whatever and turned the fan back on it's hot in my room and I like it chill!

Feel even worse than yesterday. I'm scared that the olanzapine is stopping working again. I don't want to have to take clozapine. I feel f***ing awful

I'd take a prn but they don't help how I feel they just make me sedated. Which is good if you don't mind monging out but I'm supposed to be going to the gym later (even though I can't be bothered)

My doctor increased one of my meds, paxil to 60mg. For anxiety I've been having and higher doses are also supposed to help with binge eating. I ended up not going to PA yesterday because by time I got home it was late and I was tired from going all around town to my appointments so I just stayed home. I'm going next week for sure because I have nothing else planned next Wednesday. I'm still reading the 12 step/12 traditions book. Today is day 9, I am still doing good.

I meant OA not PA

I'm sorry you are feeling so bad. I hope it's just a blip. Have you called your Pdoc?

Good morning. Woke up early today. Hope I stay this wide awake.
What's everyone up to today?

My doctor also wants me to do some research and find something good for sleep because we agreed on coming off the low dose of seroqu since she said there are better/safer things for sleep. Any ideas?