Roll Call 151

I’m still up. Running out things to do lol. Usually when I’m up this long I’d feel like my brain is burning but not now. I feel physically fine.

I was out in the afternoon and it feels like walking into an oven

My friend left. I didnt get my writers subscription box. They must've misplaced the key to the larger mailboxes or forgotten to put the key in my mailbox.

Oh well. I was really looking forward to that.

It's raining here....just gonna make it more humid. I kinda miss the winter

So I wanted to tell a little about this job.

IF I GET IT:

. They will pay for me to take classes to be certified as a peer support specialist in the state of Texas. But they said it would be a travel-trip. So I might have to goto south texas to take it. Like in Austin TX. Which is 5 hours away.

. It would be $12/hour

. I'd be working with adult patients with depression or bipolar in the beginning. Then they would switch me on and off between that and FEP, which is first episode psychosis patients.

. I'd have to travel half the time 30 or more min away to another city tho. But they said I can use the company car. But if I'm working part time then it shouldn't be much of a problem.

That sounds awesome newtus. I'm in Austin. It's a lovely city. Lots of good places to eat. I don't go out much on my own cuz of agoraphobia but I try. I hope you get it!

I had a mental panic attack last night. I was watching Ozark on Netflix. I watched like 3 episodes in a row cuz the Vyvanse allowed me to do that. I couldn't tell this reality between the one on the screen so I freaked out.

I had a panic attack after watching a movie once too. Weird..

Now I'm gonna go for a walk even though I don't want to.

Huge thunderstorm now, hope my power doesn't go out

We had some nice storms now it’s 75! Yay!

Here too, it went from 98 down to 77

Oh how I wish it would storm.
It’s supposed to tomorrow and then cool off next week.
I went outside to pick from the garden and made it about 1/2 way down the yard and decided it was way too hot. Veggies will still be there Monday

I tried taking a nap but it wasn’t happening. Waiting for my pizza now.

I can't wait for fall

It’s 8:07 here and this is our weather.


WAY better than winter but we really only get days like this a couple times of year if at all. I live pretty much right on the coast...abt 10 minutes from the ocean in two directions and 25 minutes in a third direction. It’s usually quite a bit cooler here than in the concrete jungle.

I love autumn and winter. Snow, ice, freezing temps, all of it. Can't stand summer, and spring isn't much better

Everyone around here (where I live, NY) always complains about winter, it does get bitter cold sometimes, but I guess I'm the odd one because I'm the opposite and love it. People here are always moving south to get the sun. I don't understand it.

blue_bird I am right there with you. Bring on the cold, snow, ice the whole shabang!! I could do without summer finally this year i got Central Air for the house so besides having to take Pete out a few times a day i can tolerate it locked away inside.
I mean really the heat index yesterday was 107F and today 104F. But tomorrow its supposed to be 80F at least i can tolerate that.
During last winter it went down to -40F, it thought that was rediculous but at least it wasn't 107F. I guess we had to have the extreme this summer to balance out last winter.

Midwest Tams

This is my weather currently...

it has dropped already to 84 and rain is coming i think. by monday night it says 58f YAAAAASSSSSS SIR! Open those windows

I don't think I had enough calories (500 calories) for my evening dosage of Geodon. When this happens it makes whirring noises in my head, like my hearing is going in and out. So this woul d basically be like withdrawal from Geodon. Anyone else get this? The only problem w/ Geodon I think, for me, is the short half life.

I look so awful I can't believe my friend stays with me. I wish I could go home. I want to watch Star Trek marathons everyday and order pizzas and burgers and fries and giant grinders. That would be heavenly. So stupid of me to have gotten into this mess.

This is all I take, nothing more =]

Meds;
Invega Sustenna 150mg every 28 days
Seroquel 4x 25mg
Olanzepine 5mg PRN
Vyvanse 50mg
Ativan/Xanax PRN
Atenolol 2x 50mg

Vitamins;
Vitamin D 1000ui
Vitamin B12 5mg
Fish oil 4x 900mg triple strength
Melatonin 10mg
Broccoli sprout extract 600mg (60mg sulforaphane)

Nootropics;
CBD
4-acetoxy-N,N-dimethyltyptamine 5-15mg
Phenibut 1500mg
Kratom 5g
2.5-5mg THC gummies
Phenylpiracetam 200mg
Nicotine
Caffeine

But I feel somewhat motivated again. Although sleepy. I might sleep..

I couldn't make myself take my meds today...

Tired....but I can't sleep.

I feel a bit sick. Could be the kratom. Took 10mg melatonin and 75mg Seroquel so I'm gonna try and sleep. I wish it was Monday instead of Sunday cuz then I could bring my books to the coffee connections before it starts and read.

I will say to them "I have no friends which makes me sad and alone" lol..

Maybe I could go to the library tomorrow. I really need to take it easy on myself. I'm soooo ****ing hard on myself it's unreal. I have such high expectations.

My mind is like a blank canvas and I just need to paint.

Got 3 hours of sleep, can't get anymore

I haven't been able to sleep yet