Roll Call 151

I'll be thinking of you today...

Good luck @Newt
Light and love to fiancé.
****ing sucks to lose a parent.

Got some good food

Hope everything goes okay today @newtus HUGS Kit

I'm not feeling as good as yesterday. Yesterday I felt uncharacteristically good though, so maybe I'm resetting to a sort of baseline. I'm not feeling great though. I'm having SH thoughts. I totally can't SH though because my arm is so not even healing yet from what I did 4 days ago. I don't feel in crisis so that's good, but I definitely feel off. Kind of down. I hope I don't go into crisis. I had a visual hallucination on my walk today. It didn't frighten me but the fact that I had it sort of bothered me. HUGS Kit

Hope everything goes ok today. @newtus Funerals are hard. I’m here for you if you need to talk. I’m grieving the loss of my mom’s best friend who my sister and I always called our second mom. Sometimes our second mom was closer to us than our own family. I broke down at the funeral and it was hard because everyone that has seen me grow up here in Georgia majority of them haven’t ever seen me cry but I was bawling my eyes out at the funeral. Everyone that talked from our community understood that our family was very close to my second mom. While I know that she’s in a better place and isn’t suffering anymore I just miss her so much because she was supporting me so much when I found out that my husband wanted a divorce and she knew that I didn’t deserve being treating like my feelings didn’t matter. I deserved to be loved and respected.

I'm waiting to see my therapist. I dont want to see her. I'm completely fine. Theres nothing wrong with me right now. I dont like my therapist anyways. Shes too happy and seems like she doesnt care.

I still see my therapist when I'm fine, and doing well. We work on goals and stuff in my life when I'm doing good and when I'm not we discuss what I can do to help manage my symptoms along with the meds I take. I think it's important to have someone to talk to and check in with even when we're doing good. Sorry she doesn't seem like she cares though Tweaky

Fresh vegetables are the best in the summer

Spent 3 hours at my apartment, about to go back to my grandmas now.

I'm going to drink a beer

I hope I don't get ethanol side effects

I'm back home.

I feel bad for fiances family. They could only afford the most basic funeral, and their dad didnt have a thing to leave them. Not to mention, none of their family from Iowa showed up at all. It was only their immediate family and friends. Barely anyone was there.

Really makes me sad. A lot.

No one stole my package thank god

The funeral was barely 30 min long. I was expecting an hour. I suppose they couldn't pay for longer. Oh well. Makes me sad.

What did you get from the food pantry?

Sorry

That's how my mom's funeral was, just me, my sister, her husband and my two brothers and a priest friend of my sisters. It was very small and quick

A lot of good stuff fresh fruits, vegetables, sausage, hamburger meat, bagels, rice, macaroni and cheese, noodles, eggs, juice, a blueberry cream cake, potatoes, cheese, tuna

The fruit I got was blueberries, grapes, and apples, and I also got dried fruit and nuts. Oh yeah, and Oatmeal

Nice. I got some fruits too like two days ago, only a half left now cause I kept making juices and smoothies

That’s really sad. I was amazed at how many people showed up for my second mom’s funeral. It seemed like majority of the Indian community in Georgia showed up at the funeral. Everyone that eulogized her talked about her kindness to everyone that she met at the temple whenever she was there. Some of the people who spoke didn’t even know her name they just called her Aunty. All of her nieces and nephews who lived in America were able to attend the funeral as well as all cousins and relatives who also lived in America. Everyone that spoke also talked about her kindness and her beautiful smile. I felt like I couldn’t talk because I was also going through a divorce and didn’t want to bring that up in front of everyone there. My sister was able to talk for our whole family.

To me that's so sad tho. Like dont other people care? Like idk man.

yes it is

I'm tired, took a nap. Also anxious.

can't wait for this week to be over, PHP will be over

We didn’t even have a funeral for my dad. He didn’t want one.

I wonder who would come to my funeral. I feel like not many. Maybe my immediate family.