Roll Call 174

WastingAsparagus · Sep 15, 2020, 09:29 PM

I am starting to feel like things are going in the right direction. Finally.

Erti · Sep 15, 2020, 10:40 PM

I hate myself.

childofchaos831 · Sep 15, 2020, 10:51 PM

(Copy/paste from bipolar check in thread, really don't want to retype it all)

Hey y'all. Sorry for the radio silence. I've had a rough go of it lately. My last post, I was in a psych ward after...

(triggered because of explanation, not necessarily graphic nature, but could still be triggering)

Possible trigger:

...a suicide attempt that put me in the medical hospital back on the 15th of August. I had to spend 3 days in ICU and 3 in a regular room. I had some serious neurological complications, like standing and walking issues, that got better after a few days, but I'm also still having some tremors in my hands even now. I also had a couple moments of acting out of character for myself that resulted in my being restrained, which really frightened me, when I woke up and started becoming aware again. And I was confused when they told me why... because I knew it was two things *I* would never do... and I'm having some aphasia now, too. I'm having issues recalling words for things that I want to say. I can remember words told to me that I'm asked to remember just fine, but when I'm speaking, I'll randomly come across a word that I can't recall for the life of me. It was "wonton soup" the other day and "practical" today.

That last post was on the 21st.

I started running a fever shortly after that and having some medical symptoms... on the 23rd, the psych facility sent me to the ER to get checked out after a fever of 102 and not being able to register a blood pressure. I ended up having a really serious kidney infection that had gone septic. I had to spend 3 days in ICU and another 7 in a regular room for IV antibiotics.

Then I was sent to a different psych hospital, because the one I had been at was full at that point, and spent 7 days there. So, all in all, I spent 25 days in the hospital. With two brief ambulance ride and one cab trip in there. Didnt get to go home at all during that time.

Angelique67 · Sep 16, 2020, 02:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by childofchaos831

(Copy/paste from bipolar check in thread, really don't want to retype it all)

Hey y'all. Sorry for the radio silence. I've had a rough go of it lately. My last post, I was in a psych ward after...

(triggered because of explanation, not necessarily graphic nature, but could still be triggering)

Possible trigger:

...a suicide attempt that put me in the medical hospital back on the 15th of August. I had to spend 3 days in ICU and 3 in a regular room. I had some serious neurological complications, like standing and walking issues, that got better after a few days, but I'm also still having some tremors in my hands even now. I also had a couple moments of acting out of character for myself that resulted in my being restrained, which really frightened me, when I woke up and started becoming aware again. And I was confused when they told me why... because I knew it was two things *I* would never do... and I'm having some aphasia now, too. I'm having issues recalling words for things that I want to say. I can remember words told to me that I'm asked to remember just fine, but when I'm speaking, I'll randomly come across a word that I can't recall for the life of me. It was "wonton soup" the other day and "practical" today.

That last post was on the 21st.

I started running a fever shortly after that and having some medical symptoms... on the 23rd, the psych facility sent me to the ER to get checked out after a fever of 102 and not being able to register a blood pressure. I ended up having a really serious kidney infection that had gone septic. I had to spend 3 days in ICU and another 7 in a regular room for IV antibiotics.

Then I was sent to a different psych hospital, because the one I had been at was full at that point, and spent 7 days there. So, all in all, I spent 25 days in the hospital. With two brief ambulance ride and one cab trip in there. Didnt get to go home at all during that time.

You've been through a lot. I hope you're feeling better now.

I have some of the same neurological symptoms. I've attributed it to aging and dementia but the years I spent psychotic might have a lot to do with it too. Anyway, I don't think I can write anymore. I should try though. Certain things used to come easily to me, but now I can barely do them at all.

Did they change your meds? I really hope you are feeling better, but I understand if you're not.

Angelique67 · Sep 16, 2020, 02:54 AM

I can't believe it is almost 4am. Having trouble getting to sleep.

childofchaos831 · Sep 16, 2020, 02:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angelique67

You've been through a lot. I hope you're feeling better now.

I have some of the same neurological symptoms. I've attributed it to aging and dementia but the years I spent psychotic might have a lot to do with it too. Anyway, I don't think I can write anymore. I should try though. Certain things used to come easily to me, but now I can barely do them at all.

Did they change your meds? I really hope you are feeling better, but I understand if you're not.

Thanks angelique! Im sorry you have some of the same stuff going on...

They did make some changes. They actually took me off of 4 of my psych meds and lowered the AD they kept me on. So I'm on an AD, an AP shot, and prn sleep and 2 prn anxiety meds, plus melatonin. So really just 2 regular psych meds, but one is monthly, so one I have to take daily.

I have other meds, for physical issues... narcolepsy, blood pressure, fibromyalgia, migraines, etc. that I have to take daily also.

But, the hospital did well at streamlining the psych meds, for now. Hopefully it can stay less meds.

Angelique67 · Sep 16, 2020, 03:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by childofchaos831

Thanks angelique! Im sorry you have some of the same stuff going on...

They did make some changes. They actually took me off of 4 of my psych meds and lowered the AD they kept me on. So I'm on an AD, an AP shot, and prn sleep and 2 prn anxiety meds, plus melatonin. So really just 2 regular psych meds, but one is monthly, so one I have to take daily.

I have other meds, for physical issues... narcolepsy, blood pressure, fibromyalgia, migraines, etc. that I have to take daily also.

But, the hospital did well at streamlining the psych meds, for now. Hopefully it can stay less meds.

Yes, I hope so. I wish they'd streamline my meds, especially the ad because I don't think it's working at all. And I have gained an ish ton of weight, which I'm still not "ready" to start losing.

My mom got angry at the prospect of me eating candy, the other day. I couldn't tell her the truth. I eat so much candy I'm in a sugar high for hours out of my days. For some reason I get incredibly hungry at night and I rely on candy and other carbs to satisfy my hunger. I hope I'll ease up soon.

I'm glad you're finally out of the hospital.

childofchaos831 · Sep 16, 2020, 03:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angelique67

Yes, I hope so. I wish they'd streamline my meds, especially the ad because I don't think it's working at all. And I have gained an ish ton of weight, which I'm still not "ready" to start losing.

My mom got angry at the prospect of me eating candy, the other day. I couldn't tell her the truth. I eat so much candy I'm in a sugar high for hours out of my days. For some reason I get incredibly hungry at night and I rely on candy and other carbs to satisfy my hunger. I hope I'll ease up soon.

I'm glad you're finally out of the hospital.

I'm glad I'm out too

bpcyclist · Sep 16, 2020, 05:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

My shoulder is still hurting. I've been using Aspercream with lidocaine. It helps. Not enough but it helps. It popped today so that kind of helped. I seriously need a massage but with COVID I don't think that is going to happen soon.

Hugs,kit!!

bpcyclist · Sep 16, 2020, 05:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Erti

I hate myself.

what is up?

Angelique67 · Sep 16, 2020, 08:40 AM

My keys are gone. I don't know what to do. I guess I'll have to ask maintenance to change my locks.

falcon09 · Sep 16, 2020, 10:02 AM

doctors office told me to halve my risperdal dose and if that doesnt help akathisia, come into office friday

Desoxyn · Sep 16, 2020, 10:58 AM

Hugs @ ChildofChaos <3

I'm going for a massive hike today all the way to the top of a mountain. I did it last year and it took 5 hours.

I'm a bit scared of my mom hiking with me because she drank a coffee this morning and has a bad heart. Hopefully the beta blocker makes her OK. Like I'm even worried about my own heart.

Getting to the top will be great though... I'll take pictures...

Blue_Bird · Sep 16, 2020, 12:31 PM

Apartment complex gave out lunches today

Fuzzybear · Sep 16, 2020, 04:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

Apartment complex gave out lunches today

(I'm thinking of the cartoon inner snake and the man saying .. ''think positive''... that's about where I am right now

(I do not like all the shouting.) Macaroni cheese and wine for supper tonight

(I have a sense of deja vu posting this but I don't think I have posted this before to you. Trying to think about ''positive stuff'' and not that **** ... GRRRR

nobody liked my bear humour today (well nobody in that other unknown forum). Papa bear liked it though

Blue_Bird · Sep 16, 2020, 05:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

(I'm thinking of the cartoon inner snake and the man saying .. ''think positive''... that's about where I am right now

(I do not like all the shouting.) Macaroni cheese and wine for supper tonight

(I have a sense of deja vu posting this but I don't think I have posted this before to you. Trying to think about ''positive stuff'' and not that **** ... GRRRR

nobody liked my bear humour today (well nobody in that other unknown forum). Papa bear liked it though

Macaroni and cheese and wine sounds great!

I’m glad your trying to think positive Fuzzy, it can often be difficult

falcon09 · Sep 16, 2020, 05:25 PM

Just got ativan from the pharmacy and took one...anxiety /akathisia is so bad lately

Job 30 26 · Sep 16, 2020, 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

Yeah, I'm prescribed klonopin to take as needed. I use it sometimes but don't want to depend on it too much. I'm on a mood stabilizer (trileptal) ,thorazine, trilafon, Zoloft, and Wellbutrin.

Most of the panic attacks are physical. I try mindfulness and meditation, that helps sometimes. And yoga.

Strangely enough the day I didn't have panic attacks (today) is the first day I've drank coffee in a month. I stopped drinking coffee for a month and it seemed like my anxiety only got worse, if that's even possible or makes any sense. You would think it would be the opposite

That is odd.

Wellbutrin gave me panic attacks for 4 years even after I stopped taking it. It also didn't allow me to stay asleep. It was a terrible med for me. It can *definitely* cause anxiety, BB. That might be it! It's an upper drug but without being so physically addictive. When i was on 150mgs I coulnd't sleep but it didnt' work either, so he upped it to 300 and bam, met with continual panic attacks even after i stopped the med so I got on benzos, and then an SSRI but the SSRI's might not stop the panic attacks it wellbutrin is still flowing. I'd ask your pdoc.

Job 30 26 · Sep 16, 2020, 06:14 PM

SP, how's your reading compehension these days? Are classes going well? I'm still taking the fish oil but ambien is still effecting my memory. It should get better soon though now that I'm off.

Blue_Bird · Sep 16, 2020, 06:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Job 30 26

That is odd.

Wellbutrin gave me panic attacks for 4 years even after I stopped taking it. It also didn't allow me to stay asleep. It was a terrible med for me. It can *definitely* cause anxiety, BB. That might be it! It's an upper drug but without being so physically addictive. When i was on 150mgs I coulnd't sleep but it didnt' work either, so he upped it to 300 and bam, met with continual panic attacks even after i stopped the med so I got on benzos, and then an SSRI but the SSRI's might not stop the panic attacks it wellbutrin is still flowing. I'd ask your pdoc.

Thanks, I may ask her about that when I see her in October

Sometimes psychotic · Sep 16, 2020, 07:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Job 30 26

SP, how's your reading compehension these days? Are classes going well? I'm still taking the fish oil but ambien is still effecting my memory. It should get better soon though now that I'm off.

My reading is much better but not perfect.....I can’t read long books very well....but the kind of short articles we read for grad school are fine.

Job 30 26 · Sep 16, 2020, 07:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

My reading is much better but not perfect.....I can’t read long books very well....but the kind of short articles we read for grad school are fine.

Articles are very intensive! They definitely aren't casual reads. I hae trouble reading them.

cogladaid · Sep 16, 2020, 07:43 PM

I’ve been so unmotivated at work lately. Wouldn’t know it but I won a $50 amazon gift card from work. So that’s cool. I have some paperwork to do tomorrow I’m not excited for. Been procrastinating on it. Bleh.

I see my psych tomorrow after work! I’m excited for it. I keep mentioning it, sorry. Like I said before I feel like I have a lot to talk about. Intrusive thoughts aren’t so bad but it’s good to talk about.

I’ve been learning programming languages during my lunch using free learning from work. Pretty nifty.

I’ve also been studying for my computer course I have an exam on in a couple weeks. Psych course exam is on Halloween. Starting new courses on November 1st. I’m excited for that too.