Roll Call 193

HUGS cogladaid

Hope you feel better cogladaid

My mind will not shut up, like it's a constant stream of internal chatter and is driving me crazy

HUGS Blue_Bird!

Just got back from the buildings bingo game. I didn’t win any of the games but it was still fun

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Did you miss any meds…usually my AP keeps inner chatter supressed.

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No I’ve been taking all my meds

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It’s like a constant monologue. I want a break from it.

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Got out of bed at 230pm

It might be counterintuitive advice but meditation helps me step out of the inner chatter for a while. But it has to be a very specific type of meditation. Like there's this one thing I learned called the STOP skill (it comes from DBT if you're interested in reading more about it). What it is basically is Stopping, Taking a step back, Observing, and Proceeding mindfully.

I like to think of the stopping part as just literally freezing in my tracks and not doing anything.

The taking a step back doesn't need to be physically taking a step back although it can be. I usually just take a big deep breath.

Then the observing part is like, hm, what is going on in my thoughts right now nonjudgmentally.

Then proceeding mindfully is like, hm, what should I do next.

I hope that helps some.

I am struggling with really low motivation today. I guess it's just part of my personality/illness/humanity that I have low motivation days.

Have you tried singing?

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No, but maybe I'll try that sometime, thank you

Also thanks WA I appreciate the tips

I really miss when my mind was quiet, it was for a long time, I don't know why my brain will not shut the **** up anymore. I'm glad I'm not around anyone because I would probably drive them crazy because I'd be talking non stop. I'm gonna try to meditate or something tonight, I feel so damn agitated

Is it the sun? We just hit the longest day of the year yesterday….

Tired today. I miss the fun times.

Edit: I can't focus

I definitely think too much. I feel like I have plenty to do but I don't even feel like approaching any of my work or anything like that.

It's frustrating because on the outside it looks like I should be doing a lot with my time or whatever, but it seems to me like I'm doing nothing with my time.

I also feel like a lot of people have lost their patience with me. Not anyone here. But just my family and people like that.

Seems like negative symptoms or depression. I have the same thing.

Avolition in Schizophrenia: Symptoms, Causes, and Treatment

Yeah it just feels like everyone looks down on me because I don't have a job. I know I'll get there eventually to a place where I feel like I can work or whatever, but it seems like right now that is impossible. I am just trying to be okay with that.

Also I wish I could have like three jobs. 1 as a translator, 2 as a teacher, and 3 as a tutor. I feel like I would be relatively content if I were able to do those things.

Have you considered some sort of language professor?

Yeah I forgot about that, could be

Me too, WA