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#76
Oct 24, 2013, 12:13 PM
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Urges still but haven't done anything
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
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#77
Oct 24, 2013, 02:01 PM
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Headed for an assessment for possible admission in an hour or so...might get some cutting done while I still can
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 Blue_Bird
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#78
Oct 24, 2013, 04:09 PM
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 The assessment might be a good thing secretwhisper. If you are struggling at the moment it might help you
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#79
Oct 24, 2013, 06:07 PM
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If there had been a bed I would have been admitted....instead I'm on my way back home.
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| Blue_Bird
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#80
Oct 24, 2013, 09:13 PM
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not doing well. I just want to start again. what was the point in stopping? I'm just more anxious now. I feel like I need to SH to feel better
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#81
Oct 24, 2013, 09:21 PM
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The urges are getting worse and worse as each day goes by. Haven't done any cutting for awhile though. I am just going through too much stress in my life. And next year will be a lot worse for my family.
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| Grey Matter
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#82
Oct 24, 2013, 11:48 PM
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I am FINALLY back to work after a three week leave. And it has done wonders for my urges already. Keeping busy helps. What a relief to go to bed and look forward to something...
__________________
“You are so brave and quiet I forget you are suffering.”. |
| Blue_Bird, tealBumblebee
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 Blue_Bird
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#83
Oct 25, 2013, 09:48 PM
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I'm so stupid, I deserve this. I have to do this too myself. I'm so stupid. I'm such an idiot. Nobody cares. I'm so stupid. God just kill me.
__________________
It's not as if this barricade blocks the only road It's not as if you're all alone in wanting to explode Someone set a bad example, made surrender seem alright The act of a noble warrior, who lost the will too fight. |
| Blue_Bird, Grey Matter, MusicLover79, tealBumblebee
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#85
Oct 26, 2013, 03:22 AM
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Haven't si'd since the 24th. Still getting terrible urges but the 21st - 23th were the absolute worst. I completely lost it and just covered both of my legs and one arm.. I hate myself so much for doing that. And honestly, I think part of the reason why i si'd so much is because it's almost winter. It's easier to cover up.
i need help. my parents know i'm depressed but they don't know how horrendously scarred my skin is. they know i used to si but i'm too afraid to tell them i never actually stopped. i'm just so mad at myself for continuously doing this.
__________________
i wrote the gospel on giving up |
| Anonymous200125
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#86
Oct 26, 2013, 07:18 PM
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Some urges earlier, I slept through them. Probably not the best coping strategy but at least it worked.
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
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#87
Oct 27, 2013, 06:43 AM
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I use sleep as well sometimes. Don't knock it if it works
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| Blue_Bird
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| Blue_Bird
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#88
Oct 27, 2013, 08:55 AM
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usual series of cuts and urges here.
nothing really new... a lot of urges |
| Blue_Bird
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#89
Oct 29, 2013, 06:57 AM
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No urges lately
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
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#90
Oct 29, 2013, 07:07 PM
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Quote:
 didn't give in though
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
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#91
Oct 29, 2013, 07:52 PM
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Well done on not giving in Blue_Bird.
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| Blue_Bird
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#92
Oct 31, 2013, 12:05 AM
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Some major urges due to overwhelming anxiety
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
| Liinu
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#93
Oct 31, 2013, 12:25 AM
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Hang in there. The urges will pass. Is there anything you can do to remove the stressful situation or any relaxation/distraction techniques you can use?
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| Blue_Bird
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#94
Oct 31, 2013, 12:50 AM
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Quote:
Sometimes I just need to be reminded of my own coping skills.
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
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#95
Oct 31, 2013, 03:43 AM
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Struggling right now, again. Nearly gave in last night. Somehow managed not to! But I'm feeling worse now. Again. I hate this
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| beloiseau, Blue_Bird
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#96
Oct 31, 2013, 10:10 AM
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Last night self injured pretty bad, my T almost called 911 on me. Pretty scary.
__________________
Diagnosed with: Major Depression, Bipolar with Borderline traits, Grief/Anxiety, depersonalizations disorder, disassociating identity disorder, PTSD Lost dear older bro November 1987 to March 2005 My love for him will never stop |
| Blue_Bird
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#97
Nov 01, 2013, 12:00 AM
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Had the urges today, but resisted. Hopefully I can keep resisting.
__________________
Love is.. OSFED|MDD/PPD|GAD|gender dysphoria|AvPD a baby smiling at you for the first time a dog curling up by your side... and your soulmate kissing your forehead when he thinks you're sound asleep |
| Blue_Bird
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#98
Nov 01, 2013, 12:40 AM
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Not really any note-worthy urges, today, so far, so that's something.
__________________
{ Kein Teufel }
Translation: Not a devil [ `id -u` -eq 0 ] || exit 1 |
| Blue_Bird
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#99
Nov 02, 2013, 09:21 PM
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Feeling pretty hopeless and I have been drinking. I self-harmed earlier today. I just feel like there is no point if I'm going to have to live with these scars. But I have a therapy appt on Wednesday and I've started two new meds, so I'm going to continue on to that.
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| Blue_Bird, tealBumblebee
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#100
Nov 02, 2013, 11:18 PM
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No urges thanks to hypomania, now to hoping I don't crash
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
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