Help! Telling Dr. About Cutting?? (trigger?)

i need advice

i've been having an awful time at work. fairly certain i'm going to be fired or driven to quit soon. which will leave me with no income or insurance.

this situation along with another (i recently tried to see a therapist but got scared in the office and left) has sent me into a bad place.

plus my cat died!

i've been cutting and scratching myself this past week, which i hadn't really been doing for a while

i went to see my regular doctor last week and he said he would refer me to a counselor but it could take a few months to get in.

i'm now afraid because of my job issue - in a few months i may not have insurance or an ability to pay for help

i was thinking of going back to my regular doctor and showing him the marks on my arm. so he can see that i'm really not doing that great and maybe get help faster?

but i'm afraid of what will happen!!! i don't want to be sent to the hospital - mostly because then i'd have to tell my parents (i would need them to take care of my dogs)

i worry more about them worrying or being hurt than anything that might happen to me

has anyone been in a situation of showing cuts to a regular doctor when you're not in therapy?? what happened??

i'm NOT suicidal!! i'm just a numb, non-feeling, sometimes anxious, unable to concentrate, waste of a human....blob (hmmm....kinda suprising i'm not suicidal, huh...sorry i got a sick sense of humor)

oh well i guess i just needed to write out my situation some....helps me concentrate....

do you ever feel like there's nothing wrong with you and you're just making it all up so you don't have to deal with anything like work, etc. that's kinda how i feel right now.

i don't know....

Hi gostryter,

I’m so sorry you’re having such a hard time (and that you lost your cat.)

To answer one of your questions, yes, I have gone to a doctor while not in therapy and have shown my cutting. They did not put me in a hospital. I was very calm about it but serious. I made it a point to tell them that I was not suicidal but that I was struggling very badly and just needed someone to talk to. Obviously, they seem to treat suicidal patients more urgently. I told them that if I didn’t get help soon I was afraid I’d end up in a suicidal state. Saying this sped up the process a little bit but I think with all health care and referral type stuff it takes time. Mine took no more than 3 weeks though. While I waited I relied on walk in counseling that cost around $10 through places like Peace For Families. And the crisis lines were helpful with offering different options.

And try to not let your parent’s worry stop you from getting the help that you need. I can relate so well to how you shelter them from things like this. But <font color="green">you</font> and <font color="green">your life</font> is what matters right now and I hope you do what you have to do to get the help you need and deserve. Know that my thoughts are with you. I know it’s scary and frustrating, but don’t give up.

Big hugs. ~ Bee

make sure you and this doctor...know each other well....or are at least close in patient doctor form...or even pretty comfortable with him...because a doctor found cuts on me ...and he really didnt even know me....and deemed me a hypochondriac and refused to help me....so make sure you and this doctor know each other

thank you beelieving & inacorner!!

i really appreciate your input!!

beelieving - thank you so much for sharing your experience. sounds alot like mine! very scary to think about showing what i've done!

inacorner - good point. thankfully i go to a clinic with doctors who do a great job. i do feel they will take this seriously and will help.

Your community where you live may have an outpatient hospital short term treatment. It is called IOP where I live. It is for people who are borderline in needing an impatient hospitalization. It helps keep you out of the hospital. You just go to the hospital for part of the day. You have no contact with inpatient patients due to they may trigger you in the wrong direction. You can ask your doctor or just talk to the social work department at a nearby hospital.