Bad thoughts

WIth everything going on, and i'm trying to get better, but not succeeding much. Everything is such a struggle. I'm coughing again, my chest is tight, etc. I went to my gp the other day, and not much came out of it - just that they're going to send me to do a sleep study to find out why I'm so sleepy all the time.

Today, when I got home, picked up a message my doc's office left. They said they've faxed a referral to the hospital where I'm to get the study done, and I have to call them next week to make an appointment. The problem is that they didn't give me the number to call. I tried calling my doc's office, but they were closed by then.

I spoke with a rep regarding health insurance for work. He told me that they may have questions later because half (2 out of 4) people are from the same family, and I have pre-existing conditions.

None of my illnesses are curable - just wasting money buying meds (7 meds that I'm 'suppose' to take on a daily basis).

Anyway - I'm so discouraged, so friggin tired of fighting incurable diseases. No insurance. Just breathing is hard work for me - literally.

Lately, I just have bad thoughts running through my head.

I know people here care about me, but it's so hard! It's like I'm in a maze, looking for the way out - when in reality, there is no end, except for the permenant one. Sort of like false hope. Am I making any sense? Probably not. Guess I'd better stop. Cant think, cant stay awake.

(((((((SS))))))) hugs, hugs, and more hugs for my dear friend!

I'm so sorry about all this stuff! I wish I knew the words to say. Today, I don't really know anything much to say at all.

I just want you to know that I care, and I hope you don't choose to do what you're talking about in this post.

Angela

(((((((((Angela)))))))))))) Thanks for the hugs. I really need them. You don't have to say anything. Just knowing that you care is enough.

(((((((((((SS8282)))))))))))))

Hi. I'm sorry I didn't reply already. I was the first person to even view your post. Don't hate me.
I just want to tell you that even though it is no consolation for feeling the way you do, I still care about you and hope you're feeling better since this post. Life does suck sometimes, we just need to hold out hope for that light at the end of the tunnel.

Anyway, my thoughts are with you, and I hope things work out for you.

((((((((((SS8282))))))))))))))

((((((((((((((lost)))))))))))))))))) Can NEVER hate you. You're a great person and I'm glad to know you - my friend. I know you care - and that counts a lot. Thank you.

Hope you're ok. Big hugs.

I need to tell you that reading your response helped me so much tonight, your kind words were exactly what I needed to hear. You are such a great friend, and yet you don't even know me. You have no idea just how much that means to me. ((((((((SS8282))))))))))))

You have put a big smile on my face. Thank you.
You're right - I don't know you, except that you're a friend to more than just me.

Hope you're ok. Talk to you later. Hugs