Why?!?!?!?!?!

Sooo, I've just been wondering what the hell is in chicks minds now'a'days.

I'm 17, My friends are around the same age. My bestfriend [ from back in the day ] got prego at age....14 !! And she wanted too ! She purposlly got pregnate. She told her boyfriend she was taking the pills, when she really wasnt...and boom....she got what she wanted.And now she regrets it. [ and also, she's now 17, prego with her second =| ]

Most of my chick friends are pregnate, I have atleast 9, and all are prego or already had a kid, except for 3 [ including me ]

Most of them want pregnate, and get prego on purpose, or not use protection, knowing its a possibility, but they still do it !!!!

Most of them regret it once the babies here.

My Bff Maine, got prego on birth controll, she regrets ever doing it, and regrets still not being safe with protection. But she does not regret her son. She even talks to teenagers about it, thats what I think is so nice, that she's sharing her experience and letting people know how hard it is at a young age. She's trying to make a difference, letting them no babies are cute, but hard to take care of.

But most chicks want pregnate....why? I can understand wanting kids, I want some, But having a baby at a young age is tough, and I want to go to college, get a job, and if I had a kid my teenage years would be over, and it would be time to step up and be a mom...thats what I dont get... Most chicks know this, how hard it would be, but they still get prego?

I've lost my V-card at a young age, and I regret it... But I was smart enough to make sure I had protection, Birthcontrol, anything I could think of.

And whats up with this whole " if your not having sex, your not cool" I dont get it. And another thing, having sex to show off? Its pathetic.

Thats all I really had to say.

Sorry it was just on my mind, sorry if this might have offended some people =/

Also, sorry that it was a long post, hope I didnt bore people to death

I'm 22 and a virgin, and I hide it from people. On the weekend some people I was with started talking about oral sex and then one of them started talking to me about it like I'd actually done it, like it was a damn expectation that I'd shagged someone. I tried really hard to evade the topic and my male friend that was with me was trying to change the subject because he knows the truth to a lot of things. Of course someone suggested I was a lesbian.
It frustrates the hell out of me, that I have to HIDE it otherwise I'll be questioned as to why, and then everyone will end up finding out that I've also always been single, and then they'll want to know why, blah blah blah. The other thing that that pisses me off is that when people try and guess the reasons why, they always think I'm gay, prude can't get any or am religious, but nobody ever seems to consider abuse.
I am EMBARRASSED to let people know I am virgin.

Dont be embarrassed Evening. I wish till this day that I would have never done it. [ And yes, abuse makes it alot harder ]The fact is, its more special when your first time is with someone you love. Thats why alot of people wait till married, its just not all about the bible sometimes. When your ready, you will know.
And I know what you mean, My friends used to make fun of me when I was a virgin, saying I was scared, Lesbo, Heartless, try not to let it get to you. Being a virgin is a wonderful thing, dont let anyone tell you otherwise.

I sometimes wish I was a virgin. I gave it up too early... didn't really consider the consequences etc.

People put way too much emphasis on sex. I did, and sometimes still do. But that doesn't mean it's right. I envy people who are virgins...cuz once you do the deed, it's not like you can just un-do it.

Pregnancy is a whole other issue with me. I don't get why girls trick guys into getting them pregnant. I could speculate why though.

In my case, I got pregnant... on accident though, wasn't like I wanted to. I was on birth control... obviously that failed. Needless to say I'm not a fan of the pill. Ultimately, I miscarried... it was a blessing in disguise. I was only 15.

Some girls really need to get a reality check. Fortunately, I have the sense not to want a child until I know I'm with the right guy.

I didnt think it threw when I was younger too. I thought that it would be easy, And I felt if I didnt do it I would loose the one I love. Thats why I have problems in relationships, If my Bf asks me to do something, i'll do it [[ atleast sexually] even if I dont like it much. But now that i'm honest with him, he doesnt mind me saying no to somthing I dont want to do, and he doesnt try to force me so i'm glad I found a awesome guy, that cares and loves for me, I've never felt more loved. Its hard wen I dont see him for a couple days too :/

I also envy Virgins, for the same reasons you said CherryDrops.

Even on brith control it is not 100% safe, I got prego, and had a misscarage, Now, because of this, I'm hurting everyday, even though I was not ready to have a child, I would have rather it lived. Thats another thing, Teenagers that get pregnate, Its not just all there fault, Like me, I could have did something to prevent it, and so could everyone else.

I lost my virginity at 15 and I didn't want to do it. He definitely pressured me into it. I don't necessarily regret it because I figure everything from my past makes me who I am, and I (for the most part) like who I am. But at the same time, I do wish it would have been more special.

My sister got pregnant at 17 also. She had asked my mom for birth control and she refused thinking that she would be condoning premarital sex. Well, she used condoms and still got pregnant. Don't get me wrong, I, nor anyone else in my family, wouldn't give my niece up for anything in the world. She is such a bright, fun teenager and I'm so happy she did not give her up for adoption. However, she did have to get a degree while being a single mom and, being 11 years younger, I watched her do it. Which, luckily, I learned from.

That's why I don't get why parents don't have a more active role in their child's "sex life". Personally, my family NEVER talked about it. When I got my period at 11, I had no clue what was going on! My school district taught abstinence only and I just didn't buy it. But my sister talks with my niece a lot about how hard it was for her. She has openly said that she wants her to get the HPV vaccine and be on birth control if she ever thinks she will become sexually active. She has been very open with my niece and I think that's part of the reason my niece has not lost her virginity yet (or at least I don't think she has!)

I think a lot of parents take a back seat when it comes to this issue hoping that, if it's never brought up, they'll never have to deal with it. And that is really sad to me.

My ex presured me into it most the time, not the first time though.=/

My family never talked about sex to me, I never new what it was till I seen it on TV when I was about 8-10. I rather them not give me the talk, My mom trys to now, but to be honest, its too late, And it feels plain akward.

I think around the 13 age is when kids should learn about sex, Schools should not have to teach it to kids/teens all the time, parents can help.

^ I agree that parents should help, but parents don't have a curriculum enforced by a body of professional educators. While most parents do have good morals regarding sex, I've heard some horror stories about parental sex ed. I asked my brother what puberty was when I was 9 and didn't really get the answer I was looking for. Mind you, had I asked my mom or dad, it would have turned out a lot better. But my point is, teaching kids about sex in a classroom is important. It's not as personal, but it provides a point of view that's different from a child's parents'.

But regarding girls who get pregnant intentionally, that just makes me sad. I knew a girl in high school, she was 18 at the time and intentionally used her boyfriend just to have a baby. She dumped him as soon as the doctor said she was prego. She was not financially stable, she had not graduated high school, and the child's grandparents were both her and her daughter's main source of support. I'm sure the baby will grow up healthy and happy but I just can't wrap my mind around using a guy like that and wanting to have a baby when you are not financially able to care for it.

I'll admit, sometimes my maternal instincts kick in and I think I'd love nothing more than to be a mom. But I will never do something spontaneous like that. For one thing, I haven't lived life long enough to provide a child with a strong, good influence. Teens who have children still have a lot of growing up to do themselves. They still have so many lessons to learn and to pass on.

And as for losing one's virginity, I lost my v-card when I was 15, due to pressure from other people at school. I'd never had a boyfriend, so as soon as I dated my first guy I made a personal pledge to sleep with him at least once. And it was probably the worst consensual sex in the history of consensual sex x) I don't regret it, it's just a part of my life story and helped push me along to wear I am today. But it is humiliating and hilarious to think back on...

I agree with everything you said AmDaws :] You madea really good point.

I was 18 and in a relationship with someone who cared and who I knew would look after me. I guess the first time is never the most pleasurable, but it wasn't painful and it was special to me.
I'm glad I chose what i feel was the right person.
Sure, we broke up a few weeks later, but still remained good friends. After that I went on a bit of a wild spree, sometimes not being quite as careful as I should have been, but I came out ok, and have now been in a relationship for nearly 5 years, bar a 6 months break.
Pregnancy in young girls is ridiculous. Up until about 1 year ago, I was totally against the idea of having children. Now I'd like to. But I first want to get married. I take my pill regularly, and I'd never consider going off it without my bf's consent.

Peer pressure plays a big role in teenagers getting pregnant at such a young age - it really ruins your life though, and is VERY difficult to deal with

I so agree with you Suga Horse. I think teens do it because they feel if they dont, there labeled as uncool, which is not the case at all. Some do it thinking it will make them feel more loved, theres tons of reasons. And theres lots of ways to prevent it.
First it was adults before marragie, now teens, whats next, little kids?
Alot of people should be taking this alot more seriouslly.

I'm with you, Yoshi! I can't even comprehend it. Like you, I lost V-card at an early age [it was the thing to do, back in the day, and I craved having a "boyfriend." What a joke!~ Like you, I didn't waste a lot of time securing birth control, and I never had children. Altho I regret this to some extent in middle age, my maternal instinct has still not kicked in sufficiently to undergo all that would be required to bear, raise and educate another person. Do you think the girls you reference are getting prego to keep the boyfriend? To have someone that will love them? To live "on the edge" during the sexual act? Your guess is as good as mine. Thank You for providing some great food for thought to those who might be in such a situation. billieJ

I'm sorry BillyJ! And you also made a very good point.
I find that another reason teens think it's okay because there mothers, siblings, or friends did it. Which is not true. Of course everyone makes mistakes, and we have to live with them. But most teens are not very good parents, as far as I seen, and why have a baby, when you cannot support the child. That's what I dont get, Teens want a child, and try to have one, even though they know they cannot support it.
This subject really gets to me.
Sorry if I offended anyone

Happy holidays everyone