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#1
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Hi everybody,
It's about masturbation, I'll say that right now in case that makes anyone uncomfortable. I just feel really guilty about doing it. When I do, all I can think about is my mother and what would happen if she knew. I feel like she knows somehow. I've been doing it since I was 12, and I'm 16 now. I know it's not something to be ashamed of, but I just can't get comfortable with doing it and talking about it. My parents and I were never very open when I was younger and we still aren't. When I was 10 and started my period I asked my mom not to tell dad. I'm very interested in sex as a lot of teenagers are, I just am not comfortable discussing it with other people. And about my thing with masturbation, that I don't know who to talk about to. Certainly not my parents, and not T either because that's just weird ![]()
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Only you can prevent neurotypical jerkiness!
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![]() FooZe, lynn P., notz, Typo
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#2
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Kudos to you for going ahead and starting this thread, Indie. I noticed you seemed to be hesitating a little earlier. ![]() |
![]() Indie'sOK, lynn P., Typo
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#3
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Thanks Fool
![]() ![]()
__________________
Only you can prevent neurotypical jerkiness!
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![]() FooZe, lynn P., notz
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#4
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I'm glad you don't feel ashamed about it Indie and I understand how you don't feel comfortable talking to your mom. Did she educate you about sex? I think you could talk about it with your therapist if you're comfortable or if you have a cool aunt who you trust or a friends mom who's open.
Regarding menstruation you can post in the Women's Forum and we could help you with that or any other issues. This forum is also great for young people who need questions answered. I know what it felt like to be clueless when I was younger and didn't want my own girls to feel this way. We are sexual beings and that's okay.
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![]() ![]() *Practice on-line safety. *Cheaters - collecting jar of hearts. *Make your mess, your message. *"Be the change you want to see" (Gandhi) |
![]() Indie'sOK, notz, Typo
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#5
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I understand the hesitation to discuss things such as masturbation with a T, I know I never had the gall to do such, but I think you should, looking back now I wish I had.
I understand, sometimes it's hard to feel comfortable, but it is your body, and what you are doing is not wrong, no matter what your mom might say if she knew. It is a perfectly normal thing to do. I don't know if that helps any, but sometimes it helps to hear something like that from someone else. As for if your uncomfortable talking about sex with your parents, and feel the need to know more, there are many books out there geared towards your age group with information and can answer questions on the manner. It wouldn't hurt to look on amazon.com or other book sites for them. Feel free to pm me anytime about anything. Best Wishes Typo |
![]() Indie'sOK, lynn P., notz
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#6
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Hello Indie, I wasn't very open with my parents either. Like you we just didn't talk about it. My parents are very closed minded when it comes to stuff like this. I like these forums too because I too feel free to discuss my issues regarding sexuality.
I started masturbating when I was 10... felt what an orgasm was like and loved it ever since. But yes I use to feel guilty about it... like I felt wierd that I did it... felt like I wasn't normal... still have feelings ragarding this. But yes keep posting here. I'm glad you feel comfortable here, that's what this place is here for. |
![]() Indie'sOK, lynn P., notz
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#7
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Thank you very much
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#8
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![]() Indie'sOK, lynn P., notz
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#9
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Thanks. I don't see why anyone would think it was too much - the forum description itself says it's for "frank and open discussion". If you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen
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__________________
Only you can prevent neurotypical jerkiness!
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![]() FooZe, lynn P., notz
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#10
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Exactly! yeah hon you're fine. In fact I like the details... it helps wth understanding the person better.
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![]() FooZe, Indie'sOK, lynn P.
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#11
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your fine hun! Like you said this forum is for frank and open discussion, if you never say anything or never ask, you'll never learn!
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![]() FooZe, Indie'sOK, lynn P.
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#12
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Thanks!
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__________________
Only you can prevent neurotypical jerkiness!
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#13
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I am in the process myself of finding nonjudgemental folks to talk to about my s*x*al issues. Billi
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The idea of a soul mate is an ILLUSION. In reality, we must learn to be our own best friend/partner. Then if love comes to us, we will already be whole. All that love can do, at that point, is enhance our wholeness! ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() Indie'sOK, lynn P.
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#14
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Indie-
The first (and only) time I talked about masturbation with my T it was really scary. I don't know how we got to the topic. But she was really supportive and was totally more comfortable talking about it than I was. And she was really supportive and didn't leave me feeling like a freak. And said we could talk about it whenever I wanted, not that I took her up on that offer. Something I try to remember in T is that there is nothing I can say that they have not heard before. |
![]() FooZe, Indie'sOK
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#15
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I could never image talking about masturbation with my mom (I can talk to her about sex, but for some reason not masturbation.
I have found it easier to discuss that with a good friend of mine, who is like a sister to me, I don't feel the anxiety from discussing it with someone that is an authority type figure, and it is easier to discuss it with someone on my own peer group. Maybe you have a close friend you could discuss it with? |
![]() FooZe, Indie'sOK, lynn P.
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#16
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Thanks you guys
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__________________
Only you can prevent neurotypical jerkiness!
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![]() lynn P.
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#17
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If you have any questions you could try asking them here or in the women's forum - if you're comfortable of course.
__________________
![]() ![]() *Practice on-line safety. *Cheaters - collecting jar of hearts. *Make your mess, your message. *"Be the change you want to see" (Gandhi) |
![]() Indie'sOK, Typo
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#18
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Lynn P has a great idea, or you can PM one of us if you are more comfterable with that. I will try my best to answer any questions you may have.
(((((((((((((Indie))))))))))))))) |
![]() Indie'sOK, lynn P.
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#19
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Thank you ladies
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__________________
Only you can prevent neurotypical jerkiness!
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![]() lynn P., Typo
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#20
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Dear Megan,
You may put your mind at ease. Your mother may not know you masturbate per se. Yet, given your age, I'm confident she surmises you do. Since, it is a perfectly natural, normal act, most everyone engages in. It is also perfectly normal to feel uncomfortable discussing masturbation, particularly with ones parents. Since it has been made a moral wrong in the past, and still is considered wrong by some religions. In regard to questions or issues, you may have regarding masturbation, I think you will find it relatively comfortable to post them here. Ultimately, it would be good to discuss them with your therapist. Talking about the subject in person, will make you more comfortable with it. I wish you the best, Larry |
![]() FooZe, Indie'sOK, lynn P., Typo
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#21
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![]() Thank you for the support though everybody. It is soooo much easier to talk about it on here than in real life.
__________________
Only you can prevent neurotypical jerkiness!
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#22
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Where was the awkwardness? Was it awkward for you to find what you wanted to say? For you to actually say it? Did your T seem to have any difficulty with it? Were you too preoccupied to notice if she did or not? |
#23
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The awkwardness was just in saying what I wanted to say...she appeared to not have any problem with it, so I'm not sure why it seems weird to me. I think I'm just skittish about taking about it face to face.
__________________
Only you can prevent neurotypical jerkiness!
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#24
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I understand what you are saying Indie, it can be awkward to discuss things with T, I saw my T for a short session this monday and it was really hard for me to tell her I was bisexual, it felt uncomfterable and I feared she would be judging me. but she didn't even react at all the way she thought I would and it was a relief to me. (I was expecting her to throw rocks at me or something)
I would say progress with T as you feel comfortable, but sometimes the only way to become comfortable with something is to waddle through some of the discomfort first. It is awkward to have those discussions, I use to dread asking my mom questions I would have about sex or female issues, it was awkward and uncomfortable, but the more I did it the less nerve wrecking it became and the easier it became overall for me to discuss sex or masturbation or any related topics. ((((((((((((((Indie)))))))))))))))))))))) |
![]() Indie'sOK
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#25
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Thank you Typo...yes that's what I was thinking as T and I were talking yesterday. It's just one of those things that I'm only going to become more comfortable with by just sucking it up and talking about it. The face-to-face vs anonymity on the internet is still a problem for me but I think that's normal.
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