i never have a handle on it!!!!!!

i went into store to buy curlers because my hair is getting longer and i'm disgusted with it and thought i could loosely curl it....well, by the time i got the curlers in my hand, i had told myself that i really wasn't worthy of them and i put them back. i do this all the time....then i hate it later.......yeckkkkkkkkk

my hair sucks wads too. always sticking out the wrong way and looking like a stupid mushroom head. you have my condolences!

thanks for the replies and understanding........

Pat,

I wonder if there is something you could do to talk back to that voice saying you aren't worthy of them...something like attach a little note to the sun visor of your car that says, "I DO deserve good things." Maybe that idea's not the right thing for you, but just something that can stop the negative self-talk in its tracks.

Because the one thing I am sure of is, you definitely are worthy of good things, especially something like this, that would make you feel better about yourself.

*hugs*
Jo

Pat... STA works for that, too.

DAMN! I wish I was close to you and Susan! We'd have a "hair" day! I'm an ex beautician and a damned good one at that. I sure could have some fun with you guys! LOL

The way I see it, my hair is one of my strong points. Since I was in beauty school some 40 yrs ago, I've always done something to it, I look at people and think how I would change their hair. The only drawback is that I don't trust one singel hairdresser to touch my hair!! They always screw it up one way or the other. Invariably, I come home and fix it when I've gotten up the resolve to go.

Hair and the way it's taken care of, to me, says alot about the person and their state of mind. I reflect my own state of mind with mine and also whether I wear make-up or not.

Pat, it's not a matter of whether you're worthy or not. Just look at it as something new to do. If I knew what hair color you have, how much grey, etc. I could tell you of something really simple to do to it to get going on taking better care of it.

Ok, ok... here's something you might think is "eewww" but try it anyway. We can all stand some good conditioning. Before you wash your hair next time, get some mayonaise and work it in really good. Yes, MAYO! LOL Wrap it with a plastic bag (don't put the bag over your face, BTW!) and sit in the sun or warm it up a bit by puting the blow dryer on it. Let it sit for about half an hour and then go ahead and wash and whatever you do to it.

Susan, if your hair is thining, massage your scalp and loosed it up. Do this everytime you wash your hair. Make your scalp move over your skull. It may take a time or two, but it will work. If not, it will at least feel good. LOL

Anybody else have hair problems?? I'm here to help!

(((((Pat)))))

I apologize. Before reading your posts just now, I just had this sense that oops, we got carried away off-topic on your thread, and I was wondering how you were doing. I guess I figured that a hair styling party might help out with your self-esteem and be a pleasant distraction, but I feel bad that I didn't even address you or your post.

Honestly, that's easier than directly giving you advice about self-esteem. I know that you have been facing some difficult life circumstances, and that can knock your self-esteem around, especially if you have self-esteem issues to begin with. You're a great person, and we can see that here. Being assertive enough to redirect your thread and let us know what you need is really good. We could come up with lots of kudos for you based on your postings. I'm not sure it's a lot of help, but maybe a place to start would be noticing for yourself all the things that you like about yourself and the things that you do well. Would you like to start here? Maybe that will go along with the hair styling party thing. I hope I'm not just sticking my foot further into my mouth here.

Take care,
Wendy

thanks to everyone of you...it appears that my lawyer is caving on the damages that we should seek from the bank that loaned my neighbor the money on my property....that just knocks me flat. i'm supposed to pay about $14k in legal fees that we incurred because of the bank mistake? that's what he told them that we would do. he didn't even discuss it with me. it's not like Stephen to do that. i called him and he wouldn't talk to me. that shocks me completely.....so now, i just feel like "i don't deserve any better".

as for the positive??? i am good with the patients at the clinic..i'm kind and caring. and you're right.......hair do would help. i'll get the color tomorrow and get my daughter to do it. her husband is in the field. i don't really think it's depression at this point. it's more like giving up. the meds keep my mood pretty stable now.....before i would have been suicidal.

thanks for all the kind words. i'm going back to bed.......don't know what i've got or if it is a result of the meds. i see the Pdoc tomorrow... xoxoxo pat

Wait, so let me get this straight. Your neighbor took out a loan using YOUR property as collateral? Is that what happened? So now you have to sue the bank to keep your property? Yikes.

I think the 'giving up' part goes hand in hand with depression. Of course there are various degrees of depression -- just because you aren't suicidal, it doesn't mean that you aren't depressed. I'm not trying to tell you how you feel, but just from an outsider's point of view, people who are not depressed don't give up on themselves.

I can, however, understand your strong reaction to your lawyer not wanting to talk to you. However, you are the customer and are entitled to an explanation. Could you write him a calm note asking for a summary and perspective of what's going on and then fax it to his office? Maybe give a fax number where he can send you a reply?

You deserve everything -- this is YOUR property and YOU are the client. Do everything with as much dignity as you can muster and if you stay on the high road, then whatever doesn't work out to your satisfaction will not be because you didn't give it your best shot.

What do you think?
Love,
LMo

thanks to each and every one of you....i have done well with affirmations before. i used to have a book of them and i read one every day...i'm going to try to find the book...then i'll put some up.......
the house........i'm composing a letter to my atty about the house. i know he's tired of the struggles..as am i....but you're so right..it's my house and my property and for him to say that i'll sign something that absolves them of paying the legal bills that they caused me to incur isn't working for me.....i went to bed last night and just worried and worried. the bills will be at $20k before i know it.......i need the money to live on while i'm in nursing school....
every one that answered me, it's truly appreciated. i hate giving up on myself and that is what is going on. i did have a very good appt with the psych doctor. she is wild! she put me on thyroid medication. said thats why my metabolism is so low and my skin and hair are so dry, etc, etc.......and all my meds are free! so that's a wonderful affirmation of all the legwork and stress i went through to get to see her.....now i will start seeing a psychologist on a regular basis.....whewwwwwwwwwwwww.. life is hard and then you die.......xoxox pat

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life is hard and then you die.......xoxox pat

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Yea, hardly seems worth it most days.

that was a joke...and i probaly should not have put it on there.....i was feeling really, really tired and it just popped off my finger tips..sorry

Guess it shows how stupid and gullible I am.

that makes two of us, Angelgirl... I thought she was serious, too, and was going to send her a PM to talk it out.

Angel and LMo:

At least I'm not the only one then.

i am so sorry for making that flip remark.......can we get it removed? i don't know how or i'd ask.......pat