Dealing with self hatred

Has anybody triend?

I just don`t knwo what forum to move it and i think that HERE people post the most
ha!

post
most

Anyways ones i started SI ing at the age of 17 i stopped....for many reaosns....one of them was that i wasn`t REALLY addicted thanks God. I also

SWORE BY THE NAME OF GOD to my Aunt. and when i rememebred that i KNEW that i can`t.

I tried swearing the same way in my head that i will never hatre myself

well - i think that i don`t that much of HATE...maybe..like scolding myself crazyly...about forgetting things and stuff

Lsiten - you may say that i need more time and that self work take it yes it does!

I have been working on it since the age of 13

It`s teh issue of my life to do htings WITH ALL MY HEART
that means that i don`t think i am doing wrong

I have this especially in 2 case these days:

1. When i work and i see things are not working as i planned and i start fo panic and i think that i never work hard enough or not concentrated enough but when i hear students form my class talk about doing homework they talk about the same amounts of time it takse them to do. I feel the same way of "not ok when spenign money or rest i know i FAIL something

RIGHT Now i fail because i have to go to the shower and go to bed but i just got into it

i feel that way when i compare myself to others and i hate it it makes me cry feelings "less" and i KNOW it`s not true

It`s disgusting to think that my self worth has to depend on external thing when i know it should not.

what is annoying me is that i KNOW A LOT of things from psychology AND spirituality....you already heard me here probaly...talking about self reliance phylosophy and pthers and more and more andmre conversaitons with God kittei bayron low of attraction tao te ching adn my own thinking head



You probably heard me here haha

BUT all that stuff I KNOW that i shouldn`t feel like that althoguht the fact i do can mean that i should. exceptence not deniyal.

But in hte end i feel that crappy way...i try sometimes useing my natural emotions- my strongest is anger......so i say %#@&#! whatever **** me

But somehow i don`t knwo if i get to the point

IT`S LIKE- EVERY TIME I FIND A NEW "DEALING METHOD" OR THEORY OR PHYLOSOPHY I rave and i do it for a while and then things get forgotten adn i feel careles adn depressed about the way i am and a looser again

Do you think that in a way people who have it will have to for all their lives?

I think you are struggling with the same issues as a lot of people. It is, I think a life struggle. But instead of feeling like a failure you can try small steps. Today I will do one small thing that reinforces my good feelings. Whatever that is for you. I also think that though you know a lot of different philosophies, that you have not really figured out who you are or who you want to be in the grand scheme of things. I hope this makes sense to you. I had to learn what were the most important values for me? Where do I want to go? How do I want to live? I keep asking some of these questions and finding my way as life changes more. I hope you can reflect inward and learn what is important, what you can celebrate each day. Maybe you will volunteer or something. It's hard to know.

This is a tough one. I think learning to really like of love ourselves involves a lot of hard work, for me it took a lot of CBT to overcome distorted thinking patterns. It also meant really and truly objectively looking at my faults and accepting them as part of who I am, but as traits I can work on changing. I also had to be willing to let people into my life, and be willing to accept love and positive feedback. It meant finding out who I am (still working on this) and what I believe in and what I want most out of life.

It is hard but it is not impossible. 3 years ago I hated myself. Today, most days I like myself, flaws and all.

--splitimage

((((((ladymacabethadmunsen))))
SOmetimes I have found self hate to be a learned trait. Maybe from childhood on up. Its always easyer to forgive others than ourselfs
Remember you are important.............

A lot of people have recovered from self hatred, depression, self-destructive habits, etc. You were able to stop hurting yourself physically. I would take that as evidence that you can change. Don't give up, even if you have more things to change after overcoming one. Get help from a professional if you still struggle with change and not liking yourself. It isn't easy to change how you feel about yourself, but that is what is at the bottom of a lot of therapy, even though approaches may differ.

You can do this, and you don't have to accept misery or other limits on your life and your potential!

Rapuzel and nufy - thanks for your encouraging words

Wisewoman and splitimage - you pointed out somehting very interesitng.......that we have to knwo clearly HOW WE ARE

That`s something i haven`t thought about.
It`s good because...well i knwo some1 who has a theory of saying this"

"Every human being has this life, but many trap it. They do this by trading that actual life for the crappy story of who they believe themselves to be which is what you are doing in this e-mail. If what you just read offended you it means nothing more than the fact that you are protecting and defending the crappy life that you believe to be yours. It is not "your" life, it is the life that your mind is playing out time and time again, and since you don't know who you really are you filled this whole with this defective sad and lonely story that has nothing to do with the truth."

here he says lonely but i say anyhting- when you DEFY yourslef more clear of ourse it may get easier.

But i consider mys;ef as some1 hwo knows what i want from life...

I think that we just live on the out side when we get into a case - we forget and go forget and the remember and relieve

forget and recall who we are

the waking up to what you really are is happening after you get come comfortabel and more sued to waht you have,....and theus you get all the strenth to deal fomr inside and don`t need anyhting else

Damn that is such great happiness to write it!