ok here goes...

there are international agencies to assist... can you research that on the web?

this shouldnt be happening to you...

international agencies??

im working on finding something blue... hold on ...

check out this link... just cut/paste into the browser... theres crisis contact info there...

http://stopitnow.com/resourceguide/rg03_vicsurv.html

oh ok. yeah they've got such sites in the netherlands too. thanks.

blue I'm so sorry you are dealing with this, I am a female survivor of sexual and emotional abuse, I would like to help if I can, pm me any time.....are there any adults you trust at all? Someone you can tell about this?????

love and hugs Jinnyann x

i wouldnt know who. besides they would all think they know whats best and inform youthcare (ss) wich is what i dont want.

where does your mother stand in all this,you mentioned that she still let your fathers friends come over...why did they not lock her up also?Was she actually aware of this before he went to jail?and if not why would she let the friends come back after the fact?I'm sure this hurts more than I can comprehend so I am trying to be careful what I say.But should'nt she be locked up as well?

I understand you not wanting your brother to read all this,I just thought that he was already aware of everything...these people seem very brave to come back even after your father went to jail.
I did not know if the social service there makes sure you will be able to keep contact with him in the future(say 3 years or more)or not.

Say 3-4 years from now when you are 18 you can get your own place and your brother can live with you...you seem mature enough now to handle your own life if it were a possiblity. What are the labor laws there? would you be able to get a job with a workers permit after scool and in the summer?I got a job in a bakery in the summer and in the mornings early before school at age 14 this way, and work became my focus and helped me alot, since I never wanted to have to depend on anyone again,
I gained work experiance and was able to land better and better jobs.

I understand you fearing for your and your brothers life right now and wish I could help more...and mabey all the above sounds silly.If you are afraid to do anything other than what you have already done I understand...I am stumped though at what else you can do....but you can not let this end your life before it actually starts.

How many people do you fear? You said more than a few?

after they arrested my father they allowed us to live with our mother cause then we could stay together.. She was aware of it before they arrested him though yeah.. I guess she dont care.
Well anyway, soon enough she took one of them home and it took only a few days before he was doing this stuf again.. and she knew about this too yeah.
I told ss and they put us both in fostercare the same day.
They are investigating the case and deciding then wether they will continue pressing charges against her or not. She's not in jail at this moment. We do not have contact with her anymore though. She doesnt want to and well.. we don't really either.
My brother knows it is.. continuing but he doesnt need to know any details and stuff and I wouldnt be able to write freely either knowing he would read it.
I dont know if ss will continue giving us the opportunity to meet each other but i dont think thats really up to them anyway, it would be our fosters who have to be willing to drive us over and such, until i would have money to go by train i guess.
Labor laws are pretty strict, i would be able to get a job when i'm 15 but it would only be for a couple of hours a week and it would not nearly be enough to take care of myself. Besides i cant go live on my own anyway before im 18 and then i would need a job to be able to rent an appartement wich i wont have if i want to study.. So it would be a studentroom wich would mean i can have him over as much as his fosters would allow... so that would be better then it is now, thats right.
I said more then a few .. yeah. I wouldnt know how much though.. im sure i havent met all of them yet.. i honestly wouldnt know.

Blue

I am glad you seem to want to continue your education....here in the states you can move out on your own at age 16 as long as you dont break the law.

I went to school until this age then I quit since the law was changed in my state that you could not work past 11:00pm if you were in school and I worked at the time from 10:00pm till 5:00am then went to school at about 8:00am.
I just figured that I had enough work experiance to get a regular job at this point and started another job landscaping full time,I figured it was better than foster care or a childrens home after my grandmother was unable to take care of me anymore(she was very sick)..after another job in construction,at 19 I got the job I still have now.

though I have to admit my past has messed with my mind and I have mental disorders that probably dont even have anything to do with the past...work has helped me stay out of trouble.

If you can get a part time job in the summer or after school if there is anyway possible even for a few hours a week you should try it...it gives you a chance to prove yourself to yourself..atleast it did me.

I can understand you not wanting anything to do with your mother ,I'd not either after all that.

You should be able to get some sort of grant for further education after high school,considering your situation.are you able to maintain average grades at this point?

You seem very smart and should be able to be anything you want in the future.

mabey you and your brother could open hotmail accounts,that is if you dont already have some sort of email contact,that you dont have to worry about losing in a move

Blue, I've read this whole thread and have a question. Where are your foster parents in all of this? Have you told them, or is it that you're afraid to tell them because they would talk to ss?

I'll tell you one thing! If I was your foster mother, those creeps would have to go THROUGH me to get to you!

BTW, I'm a survivor of homosexual as well as heterosexial incest. This kind of stuff doesn't go away easily, Blue. Somehow, some way, you need to take care of yourself and make it stop.

I'm just someone else that cares about you and what is happening.

I talk to my brother on the phone and on msn and trough emails and stuff. Letters even, sometimes.
I do have average grades still though yes, even though ive been more out of school then in this year due to being sick and moving etc.. but i should pass.
I would like to get a job for the saturday or something... I can use the money to get my brother a gift once in a while and maybe go see him more often then i can now.
I havent told my fosters, no. It's not like its easy to talk about this stuff.. and yeah they'd tell ss...
I just dont see a way to make it stop.. not yet anyway.

Blue

Blue, I am thinking about you, wishing you well. Wishing I knew more how to help you. Try and stay well. Glad you have made a lot of friends here.

Great! I started by just going to every business I could and telling them I was hard working dependable and honest,and really needed a job.

Keep up the good work at school,I'd say that average grades are WAY higher than average considering what you are going through.

You should be able to get a scholarship easy..after high school.

we dont have scholarships, everyone gets studyfinance from the gvmt, how much depends on how much your parents make. So I should probably be able to get the full amount... But i'll see about that then. its not for another 3,5 years or so.

Blue

blue, have you told your lawyers its still happening? ... there has to be a way to make it stop...

no i havent. they certainly wont be able to change anything.

what did you think about calling the crisis people? just for ideas, info... you probably can stay anonymous while you get some resources gathered..

no. not calling anyone. wouldnt be able to get anything out anyway. ive tried online chats with such organisations though. that was good, for getting it out for once. they really do try to help.

That sounds great,I'd think since technically your in the governments care, unless your adopted I guess..they should give you the full amount.

I use to want to be a marine biologist..never happened but I have had some nice reef aquariums up to 180 gallons with all live coral and a live coral propagation system that was 1200 gallons.

Have you decided on a field you'd like to study yet? Or have you been to overwhelmed to consider anything yet?

ive got no idea what i want to study.. but i guess ive got some time left for thinking about that

my heart goes out to you blue... hang in there.. still trying to come up with some helpful ideas for you...

Ya, I understand that it probably is not on your mind at this point in time really,but it is something to think about,and encourage your younger brother to think about.

It seems like yesterday that I was 14, time flys,the single most important thing you guys can do other than protecting yourselves now,is being able to provide for yourselves as adults...and not letting this ruin your future together.

You will be happy one day,rest assured,you seem to smart not to be.

Blue,

Is there any way any of us can help you? Anyone of us would be very glad to do so.

I am very sorry with what is happening to you and your brother. Hopefully we all can come up with something together to help?