Quitting two jobs due to anxiety/depression-any advice?

I posted a topic about this several months ago, but things have gotten worse for me, due to my own inability to cope lately. I worked for a non-profit up until last October for many years, enjoyed the job but was taken advantage of and had no future. I left to work at another, much bigger, company. I went through 3 weeks of training for the new position and just couldn't handle the job with my anxiety and depression, just had no motivation to try. I was then unemployed for the past 6 months, until recently getting a job at a nursing home as an administrative assistant. I had been seeing a psychologist and really thought I was feeling better. However, I resigned this new job Friday due to the same anxiety and depression. I just couldn't face it. So now that is two, really 3, jobs I've resigned from in the last year. I am finally on some medication (Lexepro?) to see if it can help me get over this hurdle. I am so embarrassed and ashamed about where I'm at. Fortunately I live with my dad, who has been mostly supportive, but he is worried about me, as am I. I lost my mom and two aunts over the past 4 years, and life has been pretty bad. It's a daily struggle to get up in the morning. I really don't want to feel this way, but I just don't know how to cope anymore. I don't even know what to write on a resume to explain all the lapse of work. I even have two college degrees. I feel so silly.
Anyone ever go through something similar? Thanks in advance for any comments/suggestions. I enjoy these forums as they make me feel less alone.

Hi lost feeling. Sorry for your losses in your life. It sounds like you are still grieving. Have you considered a grief counselor and or therapist.

For me the challenge is to find things that I can do every day that keep me in balance. For me that is yoga, mindfulness, exercise, and positive activities that give me a reason to push through the stress of work and the world.

You can do volunteer work and that can lead you into a new opportunity and serve as a reference point in a resume.

Maybe there is a pattern of the type of company or the type of job that you find stressful. These jobs could be a road sign saying STRESS AHEAD - do not proceed seek an alternate route.

These are all good things to talk to a therapist about.

Your not silly or stupid ok? I think you should soley focus on your mental health and getting better before you commit to working. If finances allow, perhaps stay off work for 6 months to a year? Just so then you can focus on your recovery.

I left a good job a number of years ago due to anxiety and I also felt very ashamed, embarrassed, etc over it. I was just out of grad school and had landed a good job but I was not prepared for the level of work this position required and I was so stressed. I didn't give a resignation - just quit - and it was not the type of thing I felt good about to say the least.

I took a few months off, got some counseling, and then went back to work. It was not easy going back (I had a ton of anxiety and my confidence was rock bottom) but I took a less stressful job initially and worked my way back up over a couple of years to where I had been.

I don't know that I have much advice ... just my own experience. I hope the Lexapro will help and staying with a psychologist is important. You've had a lot of losses to deal with in recent years. Those of us who have had struggles are not bad people ... just humans trying to find our way under challenging circumstances.

Thanks for the comments. I have been seeing a therapist, thought it was helping. I was excited about this new job. Then when I got there the place was so chaotic, and the workload was just overwhelming for me with no experience in the new field. I got too far in my head and couldn't get over it. I couldn't face it anymore and felt so self conscious. I hate myself for not being able to deal and running away. Just at a loss right now as to how to overcome this with any job I might face, and I know it's gonna be even harder to find work now with an even longer employment lapse on my resume. People in this world have so many more issues than I do, and here I am, unable to get over myself and stick it out at a job. I just have no motivation and can't bring myself to care. Life has just finally caught up to me I guess. Sigh.

Hi, Lost, I can totally empathize with your feelings. I recently quit a good-paying job because I couldn't handle the hours and was feeling stressed and burned out. I felt out of balance...work, eat, sleep, repeat until death.

I spent a while examining not just my situation but my response to it and why I felt that way and what steps I needed to take to improve. At this point, I'll try to get better and deal with the financial consequences when and if they happen. BTW, since I decided to cut back on my work schedule, I have felt much more at peace with my decision. My gf mentioned the other day that I am more happy and relaxed. Good luck!

Thanks, mountain human! I've been fortunate enough that I've had enough money saved to make it thus far without work. And I live with dad, who has been mostly supportive. I think my main thing now is the embarassment and shame I feel, and the feeling like no one will ever hire me due to my lapse in work for so long. But maybe I can find something part time and less stressful while I try to get myself together.

Sorry to hear about all your losses in life lostfeeling, I can't say I understand how it feels to loose people close to you, however I think I may going through the same kind of anxiety you have right now with my current position at a large company. I really didn't know what I was getting myself into when I accepted my current position, and it is way more stressful than my last job, and managers push and push and push you to try and do more with your career...anyways, definitely take advantage of the time off from work life to listen to yourself and do some exploring before taking your next job, if that's possible financially, if not, stay at home and work in a job that has the least amount of stress or something that you can tolerate, even if it's not much money....

That's how I felt, like I really didn't know what I was getting myself into. I would advise you to try to stick it out, but I have no room to talk. I will say that that the shame I feel from quitting the last two jobs is unbearable. And now I have no idea how to explain any of it to any future employer. I wish you nothing but the best! You are not alone!

Can I suggest doing some part-time volunteer work? Your hours would likely be flexible, less stress because it's voluntary, and it would "pad" your resume' And it will probably boost your self-esteem...

I'm so sorry for what you've been going through. I actually went through years of jumping around from job to job, because I never felt like I belonged anywhere. I even cried in a couple of interviews, which was so humiliating.

After my divorce, I was so upset and out of it that I was fired from yet another job. I did a lot of temp work after but to no avail. My depression was huge, and luckily I was living with someone who didn't mind supporting me while I gathered myself back up, and I didn't work for about six months. I only started back with part-time work because I actually got tired of being home all the time.

The point is, I think it would do you a world of good to take a bit of sabbatical, especially since you have a supportive father that can help you during this time. Kudos as well on the counselling. Reaching out for help is good. You've been through so much, and it looks like you need time to regroup. Don't feel guilty for being a human being! Let your dad know that you need to time, and you're not sure how long. If your dad is anything like mine, he'll try to boost you without pressure. He sounds like a good dad, like mine.

Good luck. And take your time with things. You're stronger than you think, and just need time to grieve and renew yourself. I hope things work out!

Thanks for the kind words, all. I've been trying to be kinder to myself, it has been hard cause I just feel so silly. I saw my therapist today, and I'm grateful that, if nothing else comes out of this rough patch, at least I finally am talking to someone, started back in December, and I really lucked out. She doesn't judge me or make me feel badly about myself, and it is nice to have someone removed from the situation to talk to. Wish I woulda started seeing her sooner, but oh well. She reminded me to take life one day at a time and not think I can fix everything at once, and she's right. My biggest fear right now is that no one will hire me, even for part time. But I've always been a "worst case scenario" type person. I know I need to cut myself more slack, and stop being so worried about what others think.

Thanks LookingforCalm! Thats how I feel, like I don't belong anywhere right now. But it is nice, in a way, to read your history and feel less alone. May I ask how you explained not working to your new employer? I don't know what to say if they question why I'd leave a full time job, then seek a simple part time job. Maybe I am just over analyzing....

Thanks for this post.
My son is going through a lot of these issues (he's had three jobs in the past couple of months) You can see the anxiety build as he goes to work each day. I would say to you what I say to him. We all are plagued with feelings of doubt and inadequacy concerning new jobs and stressful jobs. The difference is to some that it can be overwhelming. It is not silly at all and nothing to be ashamed of. My son is a good person and a capable person as is anyone with two college degrees. You are seeing a therapist and I think that's a great step. He's had a couple of false starts with therapists so he is resistant and I believe he is ashamed and he won't discuss it. I'm just trying to encourage him now. I wish you luck and hope you find the help you need. Everybody has an important contribution to make in this world.

For me, I think it has to do with my self esteem. I feel like I'm in my 30s now and should have my life figured out. I left a "decent" full time job, only to "fail" at two more when I tried to better myself. I haven't forgiven myself or gotten over leaving the job I originally had. My self esteem is pretty low. So it's kind of a vicious circle. My therapist recommended starting small with a part time job to gain some confidence, and I think I'm gonna try that. I am lucky that the first doctor I found turned out to be very helpful and supportive, and non-judgemental. It sounds like your son is probably experiencing the same issues I am, with self doubt, anxiety and depression. I wish him and you the best! I applaud you for not yelling at him, and supporting him, it can be hard to know what to say, but having people supporting me and not bringing me down further has made a lot of difference!

~Whisper words of wisdom, Let it Be~

Thanks for the reply. I'm glad you have people supporting you and that you think it helps. I support my kid 100% and although I don't yell at him, I do make mistakes! Good luck regaining your confidence!

I consistently quit jobs and it's becoming a huge problem in my life. I just started another role, and a week in it took everything I had not to send an email explaining how i didn't think it was a fit. I have quit many jobs, the count may be around 10. I become overwhelmed, feel dread, I have no ambition or motivation, and I simply feel "brain dead" because I believe I choose jobs I look qualified for on paper but no longer want to or can do. I have bounced around a lot. I don't want stress, just some nice easy tasks that I can understand, but none of those pay well. My resume is designed to look pretty good, but the reality is that this habit has destroyed my life and confidence. Also everyone must think I am crazy or a flake. I have a very hard time getting excited to meet new coworkers and I never feel like I fit in. I have a very resistant and introverted attitude, although I am actually a nice person who works hard and fast when I understand what I am doing. I don't know what to do.. just thought I'd share my story on this.

I cannot agree with you more. It's like some kind of bad cycle..

So were you trying to better yourself by doing something you loved, or by doing something you didn't like just for more status/money/whatever?