[bizi]

Up early to take a shower and wash my hair. That happens about 2 x week.
It feels so good once in there, it is just getting in there that is so difficult.
And I hate it that I almost run out of hot water....
Onto my 2nd cup of coffee, need to dry my hair and get going.
Make it a great day!!!
171.5 this morning!!!! 6 weeks sober!

Maybe I could be 169.9 the morning we leave!!!!
bizi

[bizi]

Got up a bit early and washed face, applied mad hippie vit c serum on my face and neck (love this stuff), brushed teeth, dental mouth wash and concealer on my rosacea, dressed in clean clothes had 2 cups of coffee.
My normal self care morning routine. Sharing a non scale victory: scrubs are looser today!!! yay!!
Ready to start my day!
bizi

[bizi]

45 days with out alcohol. down to 171.8, that is down 14 pounds since nov 1st.
I know that I said I was not going to count days.....I promise I won't post often about it.
oh well I lied!
lol
Getting ready to start my work day, 3rd cup of coffee down the gullet.
Hattie gets her stitches out today, hoping she can take off her coat today.
Even so It takes a full year for a wound to heal.

Have a great weekend!
bizi

[bizi]

Hello there....Hope you are enjoying your saturday! I worked and saw 4 clients and managed to sneak in a lunch with hubby. Chicken and sausage gumbo,, no rice nor bread for me.
After working out of town, came home around 5pm and hubby and I decided that we would go to texas road house for dinner. We had a gift card
While we were waiting I snacked on many peanuts, love throwing the shells on the floor! Once seated I did NOT have any of their fabulous rolls,(I smelled one though)....Had a salad no croutons and ate most of it with out salad dressing.
I had the texas road kill. 10 oz chopped steak patttie with grilled onions and mushrooms and jack cheese and a baked sweet potato with butter and brown sugar. As soon as the meal was brought to the table I asked for a to go box and cut both the pattie and the potato in half to take home. I shall eat that for lunch on monday or tuesday.
We decided that we are going to watch the movie."The nightmare before christmas", we own it and love it!

AF and loving it!
bizi

[bizi]

I weighed in this morning at 170.8!!!
So close to my goal of 169.9 before

we leave on vacation this wednesday.
It is a laundry day and billing to do.

Must pick up stamps from the grocery store today.
I am finished gift buying/wrapping and started packing.

Filled my med box for 2 weeks, need to see if that is enough
maybe need one days worth more??? Will have to come up with a used med bottle to hold the pills,

I know what they look like so that is/will be easy to figure out.
2 weeks worth of pills is alot!
I am glad that I had enough and that I did not run out this year.

Last year I had to get early refills.
It looks like it will be a warmer christmas up north.

So maybe I should not change the windshield wiper fluid??? I have an appointment on monday morning.They will also do a check up and fill tires including spare. It is not due an oil change yet so that is good.

I think I will keep the appointment.

I have the wiper fluid already and I don't know what new years will be like, too far out in advance. So I don't want to take my chances. The fluid also has rainex in it so that is good.

Last year it froze so I said I never wanted that to happen again.
Happy Sunday yall!
bizi



edited to add a non scale victory:
No more puffy/ankles (fluid retention) this morning!!!!

[bizi]

Just finished watching the sound of music.
What a great musical!
bizi

[bizi]

Ate 2 snacks last night
fudge pop and a bowl of pop corn.Am up a pound perhaps from the salt on the pop corn or just fluctuation. I really wanted to be 169.9 by wednesday...doesn't look like it.
I am still doing well so should not complain!​
171.6 weight this morning....
sigh
bizi

[bizi]

I took a shower today and washed my hair!
This evening at 4pm I go to have my first BBL treatment on my face. Supposed to help with redness, rosacea, acne etc.
She is numbing my face prior to the treatment....wonder what I will look like when she is done???
bizi

[splitimage]

How'd the treatment go?

splitimage

[bizi]

I look the same though my face is still numb, some 2 hours later after she applied the agent. Especially my lips are numb.
I have a left temporal headache. And It feels like a have been clenching my teeth. I took 2 excedrin for a migraine....though I don't think it is that per say. I started having it last night.


Spoke with Mom today.....
Too many things going on around the house with Dads radiation treatments for prostate cancer some 6 years after surgery. She doesn't want me to come home for her birthday in february.

"We can celebrate in the summer time"
(This means she knows that I will not be going to the florida trip in march).
Mom has been dealing with sciatica, at least this is what she thinks she has and that is what caused her to fall in new orleans. She has exercises to do but never saw her doctor who will probably order PT for her.
She goes in to see her for her annual soon.

Have a good night yall!
bizi

[bizi]

The BBL was a laser, and it heated up my skin that is why she used a numbing agent....it hurt at times it was so hot. She kept it at 40-42 degrees C.

slept late today 8am.
finished packing last night, just to get my toiletry items pack after tomorrows morning routine.
7 weeks Alcohol free,
170.6 this morning that is 15 pounds gone since novemeber 1st.
onto my second cup of coffee.
Jeff just left for a morning walk and it is very foggy outside.

I need to find my black leggings to wear for new years.
Not sure we are doing anything at this point. Maybe we will just have dinner with our friends Dan and Maggie. My twin has to work the day before and after new years day, our birthday!

Have a great day yall.
bizi

[bizi]

There is a grateful dead tribute band playing at a dive bar just blocks away from jeffs mothers house where we will be staying most of our trip. New years day is my birthday.
found my leggins.
need to clean out my car and pack after work. I should be home around 5;30pm.
I will change my answering machine/voice mail messages to reflect that I will be out of the office until jan 3rd. Yeah!
This is the most ready I have ever been....The car will be packed fully.
bizi

[bizi]

171.6 this morning so goal not met but I think it was an unreachable goal.
It is going to take much discipline dieting and not drinking..
My face is improving since the BBL laser treatment.
My sores are healing from where I picked at them.

got up early this morning...maybe I should jump into the shower?

hubby just got up.
We exchanged christmas gifts last night.
He got me a couple of coffee mugs made out of glass that are
double walled to help keep my coffee hot.
He also got me a new 7 iphone, my 4s just was not working that great.
I hate change....will learn it when we get home.

WE ate out yesterday at a place called Zeas. They are famous for their thai ribs, so I ordered them from the appetizer menu and had corn grits as a side dish and the crispie brussel sprouts. Every thing was delicious!!!!! And I told the manager this on our way out.

Came home and got everything ready to go until after midnight, then went to bed, jeff was already asleep..
.
I need to get into the shower.

I just need to pack up my toiletry items after I use them this morning.

bizi

[bizi]

ate and drank too much, weight gain...sigh
bizi

[splitimage]

Hi Bizi,

Welcome back. Sorry about the weight gain, but it's really hard to not overeat/drink over the holidays. Now that you're back in your own place you can get back on track.

How was the trip otherwise?

splitimage

[bizi]

I did not drink at my parents house as I had said that I would not but wanted to. Then when we went to my mother in laws house....sigh
It went well but I drank a lot of alcohol.
I was super stressed, slept in late every day.
Got up at 7;30 this morning with the alarm. Did not sleep well at all.
very tired this morning.
bizi

[bizi]

I completely over ate tonight while at trivia. and then also at home.
I am miserable. I also over drank at trivia too.

My heart rate was 136 resting.

Jeff said he could hear my heart rate while we were watching LOST.
(we have started watching the series again! yeah!)

sigh
I am a mess.
How am I going to be able to sleep tonight?????

I am having a hot flash this is not helping me at all.
I better go try to drink some ice water and cool off.

Jeff is in bed already.
bizi

[splitimage]

Bizi,

I'm sorry you're feeling so bad. I hope you managed to sleep. I know it's hard, but I believe in you. You can get back to being AF.

splitimage

[bizi]

Thank you for your support.
yes one of these days I will get back on that horse.
bizi

[bizi]

Thank you all!
I slept great last night until 11am this morning.
What woke me was the smell of the cinnimum friendship
bread jeff was baking for our neighbors and us too.
My resting heart rate this morning is 80 bpm which is fine and normal.
IT was art walk last night so I ate snackies and drank free wine.
did not drink too much went to bed at 1am.
So got 10 hours of sleep which I needed.
Jeff is wanting to go to breakfast at the diner so I better get ready.
One cup of coffee down!
Have a great day!
It is going to be chores day.
Both christmas trees, laundry.
Recharging my freon in my cars air conditioning,
Have to watch you tube video about how to do that.
bizi

[bizi]

I have sobered up enough to see some perspective.
I forgot my meds at noon, did this once while out of town too, ran out of meds.
Drank too much today making chili and taking down the christmas decorations.
Looking back over the past 6 months I have been running pretty high.
When I start ordering things off face book I am not well.
I spent about $600 for these facial treatments to take some of the red out of my face and maybe lessen my spider veins too. I have two treatments left and one tomorrow and then another one in a month.

My friend karen...if I can call her that....was a fad. It was wrong of me to talk about her on the buzz forum. I apologized but she has stopped coming to sandras for lunch. I gave her a gift certificate for christmas, stuck it into her mail box...no response. I am afraid to call her, hate rejection.
I was only trying to get information for her, I was trying to help, but it back fired.
Think I am ready to stop drinking and start dieting again.
I need to take better care of myself.
I took my meds tonight and supplements, applied face cream to my forehead, have a pimple on the tip of my nose.
I won't wear make up.

Jeff just got home from picking up a friend at the airport.
I need to get to bed.
0730am will come soon enough.
I am not tired which is not a good sign.
bizi

[bizi]

Thank you for your support!
Had lunch with 2 of my lunch bunch friends. Which is always great to see them.
I told them of my Karen stories and they both told me to not deal with her any more. She has too many issues. I am kind of sad about it...I tried to help her and she did not want my help. She stopped going to sandras cafe for lunch so that is sad, and I had been eating lunch with her for a couple of months. I gave her a gift certificate to sandras for christmas and never heard from her. I won't call her like my friends told me. If she goes to sandras again I might say hi....Rejection is hard to take. I also hate confrontation.
Maybe I will never see her again....I don't know.

anyway today is day 2 AF.
I weighed 184 last night. 14 pounds heavier than before our vacation. Drinking fattening beers really bloated me. I think the scale will reflect that in this next week.
Had a slice of jeffs cinnamon bread/cake for breakfast with 2 cups of coffee.
Ate beef moussaka for lunch with a cup of turkish coffee.
Before dinner I had a slice of sharp cheddar cheese. For dinner Jeff cooked pork chops in coconut oil. and steamed broccoli.
After dinner, I snacked on 1/2 cup of mint chip gelato and one diet fudge pop and a handful of almonds. I drank sparkling water sweetened with toffee stevia.
I had a lot to eat today but did not drink any alcohol.
Hope I don't substitute food for alcohol. I really want to lose this weight and the only way that will happen is by eating less and moving more...so I will start going to the gym again and walking on the tred mill. I will go tomorrow.

I really need to take a shower tonight as I can't seem to get up earlier in the mornings now that I have been seeing 8:30 appointments. I set the alarm for 7:30 and roll out of bed.

Jeff is gone playing trivia with a friend and I was going to go to the gym tonight but changed my mind.

Have been reading this good book called the night circus. It is very good.
Jeff and I started watching LOST again. This will be our 4th or 5th time watching the entire series. We love it! It is something that we share doing together. We were watching 2 episodes of seinfeld but it moved to an hour later so that stopped.
So I am very happy we are watching LOST again!!!!!!
Thank you for reading this post.
bizi

[splitimage]

Bizi,

I'm sorry about Sandra. I'll be honest, I thought at the time, that you were becoming over involved with her. I'm sorry she hasn't contacted you to thank you for the gift certificate, but she may not know what to say, so disappearing is easier for her.

Good luck on getting back into an exercise routine at the gym. I suck at exercise so I admire you.

And good luck on getting back into healthier eating.

splitimage

[bizi]

yes split I was getting overly involved with karen.
I am going to the gym tonight for the first time in a while. It is getting chillier and chillier and they keep the place cold which is a turn off from going but no excuses, tonight I am going!
I have been hypomanic off and on now for months.
pdoc doesn't know what to do with me.
thanks for your reading and posting to me.
((((HUGS))))
bizi
Hope you are alright?!

[Guiness187055]

Originally Posted by bizi

yes split I was getting overly involved with karen.
I am going to the gym tonight for the first time in a while. It is getting chillier and chillier and they keep the place cold which is a turn off from going but no excuses, tonight I am going!
I have been hypomanic off and on now for months.
pdoc doesn't know what to do with me.
thanks for your reading and posting to me.
((((HUGS))))
bizi
Hope you are alright?!

Maybe the hypomania on and off is tied to the drinking on and off.